[bpd mess]

My t wants my husband to come to session with me next week! She says it's time. Kind of freaks me out! I don't want to change things with t. Won't that make it where t isn't so safe anymore?

[Travelinglady]

I don't know your husband, obviously, but your T must feel safe about inviting him into a session. My T has said anytime I want to bring my husband into a session, then just let her know, but right now I don't feel the need.

[Dr.Muffin]

did she explain why she thinks bringing your husband would be helpful in your treatment?

[bpd mess]

Originally Posted by Dr.Muffin

did she explain why she thinks bringing your husband would be helpful in your treatment?

apparently, i'm kind of repeating what it was like growing up. isolate, keep my emotions to myself, protect. my husband is very patient and puts up with a lot. she wants to meet him and i think observe how i am with him. i told her i would be a different person with him there. she said "i know."

[Dr.Muffin]

ah, i see. whats your fear?

[bpd mess]

Originally Posted by Dr.Muffin

ah, i see. whats your fear?

i think my fear is that the only thing i know will change. i know change can be a good thing, but it's scary. i'm okay working on changing myself on the inside and learning to change my behaviors, but changing my environment absolutely terrifies me. if, in fact, i have emotionally replicated my childhood home, can i really pull out of that? i've kind of "trained" my husband to treat me in a certain way. can he really change? change makes him uneasy as well.

[Dr.Muffin]

i can so understand that. change sucks! even when we know it is probably for the best, its uncomfortable....really uncomfortable, at times. i think its a tremendous leap of faith and really brave to even try. be sure to talk to your therapist about all your misgivings...they are normal reactions.

[moonrise]

Talk to T if there are any subjects you don't want to get into. It's so important to keep your space safe.

[mixedup_emotions]

Remember that you are your T's top priority. If you are not ok with it, please talk through it with T until you can get to a better place with this....All of your feelings are completely understandable.

[bpd mess]

I saw my t with my husband today. it was okay at the time, but the emotions have now caught up with me. i'm spiralling. already sent an email to tell my t about it. she said she wanted to hear from me as i left her office. i think she knew i would have a hard time after we left.

[SenatorPenguin8081]

Originally Posted by bpd mess

I saw my t with my husband today. it was okay at the time, but the emotions have now caught up with me. i'm spiralling. already sent an email to tell my t about it. she said she wanted to hear from me as i left her office. i think she knew i would have a hard time after we left.

Wow, I'd have a hard time with that. I would never have agreed to have my ex in session with me (the very thought brings up extreme anxiety and anger). You are a braver soul than I am!

[sittingatwatersedge]

Originally Posted by bpd mess

spiralling....... i think she knew i would have a hard time after we left.

((((((((((((((((((((((( bpd )))))))))))))))))))))))) I would never be brave enuogh to do what you did. I hope this is a great opportunity for your healing (even if it doesn't feel like it right now)