After hours

That is a BIG thing, to actually call! You should feel proud of yourself for making it.....whether you said all you wanted to or not, you still made the call, and maybe another time, it will be easier to say what you really want/need to on the phone. Step by step....
I have a hard time with calling too.....I only have done it once (and it was really because I had an insurance question that upset me, some stupid letter I got from my insurance company.....but she was pleased I called at all!)

Thank you, and I know I should be proud of myself for just calling. I am happy I called, and maybe next time I can actually speak when he calls back...baby steps I know we will talk about it Friday and I'm happy about that, and hopefully I can really open up since he already knows something is going on. I'll let you know how it goes!

it's friday here, so hopefully friday is quite close on your end of the world.
just popping by to say i'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, sweetlove.

re: your original question - yes, my pdoc does after hours sessions for me and squeezes me in at all odd hours. but he is good at managing what he is and isn't prepared to do - so whilst he has given me a same-day 'emergency' appointment in the past, there have also been times he has made me wait until his next availability.

Saw my T today...finally. I really was looking forward to this for a while, and obviously had high expectations. Of course I was let down. There was a huge disconnect from him being away and our 2 week gap. He didn't even bring up my phone call to him or ask why I called in the first place. I had to bring it up, and we spent some time discussing my anxiety surrounding asking him for help. All I needed him to say was "Call me anytime" or "I want you to call me in crisis"...but no, nothing like that was said. Of course after that I shut down, I needed to talk to him about other things but I couldn't get anything else. So, the rest of teh session was just insignificant and a waste of time. When I got out to my car I was paralyzed, I couldn't drive and sat there for a half hour and cried. I was so disapointed. Then, an hour later I had my first appointment in 3 years with my Pdoc. I was in the waiting room for an hour and 15 minutes before they told me she didn't even know I was there..ugh! That went fairly well except she wanted to know what has happened since I was there last, which forced me to talk about things I wasn't comforable talking about to someone I barely know. So that stirred up all kinds of good stuff and once again sat in my car for 20 minutes unable to drive!

However, here comes the part I owe to all of your support and encouragement. Since I was so angry and distraught over therapy since I left, I knew I needed to go back soon. So, I called my T and left a message telling him I don't think I can wait until next Fri and I would like to come in sooner. He called back and gave me an appt for Tues. Then I asked if I would still have my Fri appt and he said "Your Fri appt is still there if you want it". I've never done twice-a-week therapy but it is starting to look really appealing and I might talk to T about it. I need to start feeling better after leaving therapy, not worse...and maybe going twice a week until I'm stable again will get me over this hump. Whatever works, right?

I'm sorry that was all so hard and disappointing. It's so hard to be left waiting, particularly when your emotions are already stirred up.
I'm glad you could ask for another app't and that your T will let you have both for the coming week! I hope you get what you need from therapy next week.

It stinks that the session was so disconnected, but it led to you calling again to ask for what you needed; good job! Often when I need something from T, we have a disastrous session, wherein he not knowing what I need, doesn't give it to me. Then the next session I talk about what I needed and I'm able to say it and he's able, finally, to give it.

I've done a lot of work on figuring out what I expect/want/need from sessions. It's hard work, but sweetlove, you are learning a lot in this process.

My T has seen me for an emergency during the day during her lunch hour and has also set up times for her to call and check on me after hours a few times. Outside of that my T doesn't have after hours appts etc.. unless perhaps in an emergency.