[Sweetlove]

I appologize in advance for this being a little lengthy or rambly (not sure if that's even a word, but you get the point) but I've been beside myself for the past 3 days and I'm so frustrated at the moment and need to vent.

Ok so I posted a few days ago about how I was considering going to therapy twice a week and found out from my insurance company that they would only approve 24 visits per policy year. When I saw my T that day he seemed suprised and appropriatly annoyed for me, but a little less then I wanted. He said he wished he had thought of checking with the insurance earlier but didn't think of it because we didn't have an issue with my last insurance. He only thought of it now becasue he suspected we were going to discuss increasing it to twice a week. I recently got the insurance my school offered. He said he's not surprised, most college insurances don't pay for anything. I was rattled and a little emotional as expected. I told him that I can't do this every other week...I would be too disconnected it wouldn't be worth it. He tried a little to get me to rethink it, saying things like "well you can quit anytime, why now?" He told me that it normally is $75, which I know isn't crazy expensive but will add up if I do twice a week. I just don't want to get in any deeper and then have to pull out, cold turkey. So, he said "give us a week to call and figure it out and if you want, you can quit next week". Well, I guess he is doing the best he can and I need to accept that, but part of me wanted him to tell me that he would fix it, give me a reduced rate and continue to see me. Plus, I was soooo happy he was considering twice a week too that it made it even harder to say I might quit next week. I mean, seriously, I've been seeing him for exactly a year and the one week I go twice and decide to ask for help and extra sessions during a crisis period...I get this???

There is a therapist at my school taht I was scheduled to see for the first time this week and canceled because I felt like I was "cheating" on my T. I could see this school T exclusivly or alternate between my T and school T, but I DON'T WANT TO...I just want my T, twice a week, for as much and as long as I want!

I am currently filling out an application for insurance that pretty much covers everything and treats mental health like anything else, which many of you said before. However, becasue I already have my school insurance and don't really qualify for this "special" insurance, I doubt I will be approved. I'm just praying that by some miracle, I do get approved.

I don't know what to do. Do I see my T every other week if that is all I get with insurance? Just fork over the $75 twice a week and see him as much as I want right now? Quit T now and start to see the school T? Alternate between both? UGH!!! So much has been taken away from me in the lately, I just didn't think my T would be part of it!

So sorry again for this being long or not making much sense. Not many people in my life understand how this is afffecting me and I knew I could talk about it on here and you all would probably "get" it. IF you read all of this...thank you so very much for listening to me rant and letting me vent

[Melbadaze]

I thi nk what you've already said is proberbly right that every other week wouldn't be enough...theres an old saying, as one door closes another opens...perhaps eventually your find another T that offers sliding scale? Is not he end not to decide to quit his T...

[jazzy123456]

do you think you could set aside some money to go twice a week for the next three weeks? maybe? maybe that would help you see if its worth investing your time in,...if its worth paying money out of your pocket? or it may relieve the stress from having to make the decision so soon...you could have more time to talk about it, to think about it, in session with your T and it could even give you more time to help yourself adjust to the idea of having to stay at one session per week...if thats the decision you make... its important to not feel rushed i think, i don't think...anything will feel good that way, rushed, worried, or stressed......you wouldn't have to make a commitment to anything right away but, paying for a few sessions may relieve this urgency to decide so soon.....if not...melbadaze is right...when one door closes another opens, itd be cool if you researched more places that took your insurance? or therapists that work on a sliding scale cheaper then seventy-five? its a difficult dilema...but, do whats best for you.

[sunrise]

I hope you will give yourself and your T some time with this decision and not quit abruptly. If you can't see your T twice a week, maybe you could work towards a compromise of seeing him once a week instead of every other week, or something in between once every 2 weeks and twice a week. For example, maybe you could see him 3 times a month--your insurance would pay for two of those visits and you could pay $75 for the third. Could you afford that much? That would let you spread the amount you pay over the whole year. On the fourth week, maybe you and your T could work out something you could do to help you feel connected--some homework for therapy, journaling, or a brief phone call together.

It sounds like your T is trying to help because he is calling your insurance. Maybe he will have good results.

[Perna]

It is confusing and uncomfortable having to figure out how best to solve a problem. You like going twice a week but don't have insurance and/or money to sustain that.

I don't know how much you pay him that your insurance doesn't pay? Do you have to pay him like $10-$15 a session yourself, or nothing? Do you have any money yourself saved or that you earn?

I would take a pencil and paper and do a chart of all the possibilities; the twice a week for 3 months, once a week for 6 months, every other week for a year and then a few scenarios factoring in as much money of my own as I could scrounge/save in addition to various insurance payments and time periods.

I would also look at it from a therapy standpoint, as if therapy were a "class" I were taking and look at things like twice a week for a month then a month off for a "practicum" or "private study" with tasks set by you and your T for you to try to do/learn while you're off?

If I had or could earn some money, I would ask T something like, "would you lower your rate to $50 a session after my insurance runs out for the year and I'll pay out of pocket" so therapy doesn't have to be interrupted and see what you can do with that and various scenarios too. Maybe you can do a combination in-person and e-mail/phone twice a week that will work for you and be less expensive.

[Sweetlove]

Melba- thanks...I like that saying. I guess I don't always see things like that.

Jazzy- It isn't that the practice my T works at doesn't take my insurance, it is that my new insurance won't approve more than 24 visits....so it will be the same everywhere. You are right, maybe other places might offer a sliding scale...I wondered why my T didn't offer that, but maybe because he is in a practice, it isn't his decision. I think I will start setting aside a "therapy fund" and see how much I can afford for a few weeks.

Sunrise- I on discussing this with him this week and hopefully finding a plan of action that will work for both of us...I hope he has good results too!

Perna- I pay a co-pay of $20 once a week right now. I am a student and currently work less than 10 hours a week, so paying $75 1-2 times a week isn't that feasible for me. However, I talked to my mom about it and she is more then willing to help out if she has the money...but I feel guilty of course. Unfortuanatly, I don't feel like I can ask him to give me a lower rate, because I don't think he decides that and I am not that brave...hopefully he will offer it first, along with phone and/or email contact. I like your "practicum" analogy..and all of your other suggestions! Thank you

Love the input..thanks again!

[iGottaBme]

[quote=Perna- I pay a co-pay of $20 once a week right now. I am a student and currently work less than 10 hours a week, so paying $75 1-2 times a week isn't that feasible for me. However, I talked to my mom about it and she is more then willing to help out if she has the money...but I feel guilty of course. Unfortuanatly, I don't feel like I can ask him to give me a lower rate, because I don't think he decides that and I am not that brave...hopefully he will offer it first, along with phone and/or email contact. I like your "practicum" analogy..and all of your other suggestions! Thank you

Love the input..thanks again![/quote]

Take your mom up on her offer. I help pay for my adult daughter's therapy and I am happy to do it. No need to feel guilty. Most likely she would not offer to help if she did not want to.

Some therapist will not offer a reduced rate to their clients. They expect the client to ask. Sometimes they can be accomodating and other times they have to say no due to limits set by their practice, how many clients are getting a reduced rate already, etc.

[Sweetlove]

Igottabme- thanks, yes my mom and I talked more and decided she will do it for as long as she can and then we will deal with it when we need to. I'm not going to ask for the reduced rate until I absolutely need to, but maybe I'll find a way to bring it up just out of curiosity to find out if they even do that.