Had the most beautiful, heartbreaking and devastating session ever today!

Liam Grey · Feb 07, 2011, 07:34 PM

Hi!

Don't know if somebody remember my topic about the various problems I had last week with an invadent big guy the appointment later mine, plus some serious stuff about me starting to having problems trusting my T;
(if you'd like giving it a read it's here anyway http://forums.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=171750 ).

Well, I don't feel like going too deep in details, but today (in her other office) it was just beautiful. The fact she says I was right about this dude being unaducate (she assure me she was personally tell off him later in their session, the same day he made that high voice remark) and that I did the right thing bringing it to her. She was reassuring and protective about this, and about the fact this dude is waiting outside the door (she said she never paid attention to it but now she'll do). I will go again thursday at my usual appointment/hour and we will see, if other problems will come out/I'll still feel uncomfortable, we'll talk about it and we'll find another solution. It's just that she doesn't want me to renounce to a routine/comfort of mine due to someone else. And to tell truth, I'm REALLY feeling a lot less scared now.

But most of all, everything she said to me after I opened up to her about my fear of her not threating me like the others, and about the "calling her by her name" stuff. I really can't describe (and the meaning of what she told me would be anyway lost in translation, as I'm from an european country with not english language, so it's really better not to), it was heartshaking in the best way you can think of it, figure you I'm shaking right now while I'm writing this post. I almost cried there in the spot (and I think her eyes were wet too) but I hold it back.

Coming back home was incredible (and plus it's a really long way from other T office to my house, I even have to take a small train).. I felt both happy and devasted for all the things I had to spit out. Never felt like this before. Usually I just feel devasted

.

Well, that's all.. I just wanted to share this moment (I feel somewhat miserable in saying so, but it really was one of the better ones of my entire life

) and to thank each of you in supporting me with my first topic... venting and feeling empathy was almost vital last week and you all let me both! Plus all your practical advices were really useful. Thanks again and big hugs to everybody.

SpiritRunner · Feb 07, 2011, 07:38 PM

I am so happy for you that you had a session like that! Those are so wonderful!

WePow · Feb 07, 2011, 08:24 PM

WOW !!! Way to go !!!!!!! That is so awesome!! It took courage! And you had what it took!

with or without you · Feb 07, 2011, 08:41 PM

Way to go Liam!! great job

bounceback · Feb 08, 2011, 03:24 AM

Really glad you had a much better session. I was wondering how you were doing. I also have social anxiety so I kind of understand how hard it is. Your T shows like she handled it really well.