[o.kay]

My therapist that I've been seeing for a couple of years, told me she felt that I was being resistant. I guess I should have asked what she meant by it -- but it sometimes takes me a while to process information-so I didn't ask. Now I'm left wondering what this means. Does anyone have any knowledge on this? I feel I try to be cooperative and really think about what we discuss in session. Does anyone have any insight into what is it to be resistant?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by o.kay

My therapist that I've been seeing for a couple of years, told me she felt that I was being resistant. I guess I should have asked what she meant by it -- but it sometimes takes me a while to process information-so I didn't ask. Now I'm left wondering what this means. Does anyone have any knowledge on this? I feel I try to be cooperative and really think about what we discuss in session. Does anyone have any insight into what is it to be resistant?

dont know what your treatment provider meant but here resistant means the client is shutting down, not talking with us, refusing to try suggestions, refusing to follow treatment plans.

[Omers]

It is a term that really pushes my buttons! In my understanding, when it has been used with me, my T has meant that I am not open to what ever it is they are trying to do with me in therapy. There have been very few times I have been resistant and I know when I am doing it. Often when I get called resistant I don't understand/need more time to let it sink in or they have wanted my healing to happen more quickly than it was. Those are just my experiences and I don't want to try and mind read your therapist so please talk to them about it.

[WikidPissah]

Old T used to say I was resistant a lot. Mostly because I disassociate and shut down and have a hard time staying present when trauma talk comes up. New T doesn't think that, he has ways of pulling me back when I disassociate, and slowly keeps me present. Then I hear the therapy and can use it.

[ECHOES]

You'll need to ask her to say more.
She may mean in general, or she may have been referring to something happening right then, that she felt you were resistant at that moment.

It's another interesting thing about you

[sittingatwatersedge]

I've noticed, with some irritatation, that (judging by their blogs & other writings) a lot of therapists consider client resistance to be a personal affront, a culpable action on the part of the client, making their jobs harder.

No doubt it makes their jobs harder! but isn't it just an instinctive protective move, like throwing your arm up across your eyes if you see something coming at you? couldn't the T simply change gears, set the original treatment plan aside a bit, and work on the resistance - and then when defenses go down, the original work can proceed?

Kay - If yr T is rushing things, wouldn't resistance be an expected reaction?

[SpiritRunner]

My T has sometimes discussed resistance with me and how she views it in me. It's not something where she sees it as personal or as something that's bad about me or that it means I'm unwilling to do the work, because it's none of those things! She sees it as a natural part of the process and something to work with me about......when coming close to the more deeply hurt areas, it's understandably harder to talk about them, to find the words for it, because it does hurt! The resistance, if you want to call it that, is like self-protection, a sort of coping mechanism......it's also a form of control, or like a way that I can pace the process of telling the stories in my own time, as I'm ready. So, anyway, rather than seeing it as a bad thing (which would really deepen the resistance, for me), she works with it......and that helps wear it down!