Missing T

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 26, 2011, 03:03 AM

Hey I am really missing my T.

I usually see her twice a week and text and talk to her in between sessions. She is on holidays right now and I don't have an appointment for another week.

We have been texting back and forth a bit but it just isn't the same.

Can't Stop Crying · Feb 26, 2011, 04:22 AM

Hang in there! The gaps between sessions can be excruciating. Does journaling help?

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 26, 2011, 04:26 AM

I had never thought of doing that for this before but I might give that a try. Thanks Can't Stop Crying, I appreciate the idea!

Elley · Feb 26, 2011, 06:11 AM

Feb 26, 2011, 09:11 AM

(((((((((PTSD))))))))))))

Those breaks are hard, especially when we see T twice a week.

Posting here helps me. Dividing the time into "chunks" helps too. So, I see him Monday and Thursday. Once Monday comes and goes, I tell myself, ok, I only have to miss one more appointment and then I can see him (instead of "OMG! I STILL HAVE TO WAIT A WEEK TO SEE HIM!"). I try to plan something that keeps me busy - like REALLY busy - so I don't have as much time to miss him.

Usually, when he is gone for a long time, I write a LONG e-mail and usually never send it (although I've sent it at times too). I just keep it in my drafts and add to it as I need to. It helps to get the things I want to tell him out of my head, so I'm not hanging onto them and letting them bounce around in there...even if it's just "I miss you and this SUCKS".

My T goes on a lot - A LOT - of vacations, so I have way too much experience with this

Hang in there. Post here. We're not T, but we can at least offer a little support

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 26, 2011, 03:39 PM

Thanks Treehouse, I like the idea of the long long email draft to T. I might try that as well.

SpiritRunner · Feb 26, 2011, 03:58 PM

((((((PTSD)))))

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 27, 2011, 03:54 AM

Well T is still away but I sent her a text before I went to bed last night telling her that I really miss her and about a meeting I had at work with my supervisor and boss, and I also let her know she better enjoy the weather where she is because it is snowing here and won't be stopping for awhile. Well at 9am I was sound asleep and my phone started chirping away. I looked at it and saw that I had 2 text msgs from T. She told me that she was very proud and excited for me with the outcome of my meeting, that she is having a good holiday, and the snow better stop before she comes home and last but not least, TTYL. It was a great way to start my morning -even though she woke me up! -She has a tendency to do that quite a bit! Oh T.
-sigh-

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 27, 2011, 04:59 PM

I received another text from my T this morning. And ofcourse she woke me up again, It is great hearing from her but I still really miss her. Still trying to hang in there...

Feb 27, 2011, 07:16 PM

PTSD, it is so hard when Ts go away and the whole routine is disrupted- I really feel for you! I think in some ways it can feel especially hard for those of us who have frequent out-of-session contact, because a week or two isn't one or two missed sessions, it's 7/14 missed days of contact with T! How nice that you're still able to text when your Ts away- from her messages it sounds like she will come back renewed and with lots of energy for working with you

As for suggestions, my strategies are similar to Tree's. I suddenly become an expert at fractions- counting down the time in 'two fifths... one quarter... one third... one half' gone. This works especially well the first few days as often each day will be a significant fraction of time down! It's less effective once you get stuck in the second part of the count down, which feels significantly less satisfying!

T and I usually have contact at the end of each day, so I have also in the past written a 'bumper email' to her and saved it as a draft. I write what I would have written if we had been texting as usual, plus letting myself tell her how much I miss her, my fraction games... anything I want to say.

I hope time goes quickly for you. When is she back?

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 03:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Improving

PTSD, it is so hard when Ts go away and the whole routine is disrupted- I really feel for you! I think in some ways it can feel especially hard for those of us who have frequent out-of-session contact, because a week or two isn't one or two missed sessions, it's 7/14 missed days of contact with T!

This is so true!! I see her twice a week and I usually talk to her on the phone before I go to sleep every night or text. I guess she is like a bedtime story for me? That sounds kinda weird doesn't it? I am not quite sure when she gets back. In my text that I sent her tonight I asked her when does she get home. Hopefully I will hear from her tomorrow but it would be nice if she could let me sleep in!. lol. Thanks Improving!

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 04:05 AM

Improving- I forgot to say that I also like the idea of a bumper email and saving it as a draft. Both you and Tree have great ideas. If I weren't terrible I would try the fraction thing but I fear and know that I would get nowhere with that pretty quickly with that. lol. What do other people do when their T's are away for a long period of time??

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 04:19 AM

I just realised that I never sleep well when my T is away. I wonder why that is....

rainbow8 · Feb 28, 2011, 04:36 AM

I'm sorry you're missing your T so much but I'm sure all the texting helps! You've been so nice to post to me tonight. I'm going to look at the news in my kids' city one more time, try to call, and then get back into bed. I'm not getting much sleep tonight.

I hate when my T goes away!! I bought 2 identical stuffed bears, one for her, one for me. I don't know if you know that. I don't think you've been posting long enough to know my story. When she went on a trip, she took both with. I didn't like that so next time I kept them in my house. She keeps hers in the office. I liked having the 2 bears together at home when she went away. I had read about that on PC and my T liked the idea! I also have a mediation/breathing tape she did for me. What about something like that for you? I hope the time goes fast for you!

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 04:42 AM

Awe you are more than welcome Rainbow.

I am not sleeping well now either. And yes I do remember hearing about your bears. I am not sure if I was a member then or if i was a lurker at the time. lol. But I do think that it is a great idea, Yes the texts really do help quite a bit. At times I feel silly though because I know that she doesn't do this with her other patients so why is it that I need her to do it with me? She has given me a few things from her office kind of like a transitional object she calls them. I keep them in my room. I hope the time goes fast as well..

Can't Stop Crying · Feb 28, 2011, 04:51 AM

Sounds like you're doing a great job hanging in there! You should be proud of yourself...good coping skills!

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 04:57 AM

Oh Can't Stop Crying, Thanks so much! That means a lot to me. The texting really helps me and the blanket and pillow help as well. Thanks for your support. I still wonder though why do I need her to text me? And why does she do it when she doesn't do it for anyone else? Don't get me wrong, I really appreciate it, I am just curious I guess...

Can't Stop Crying · Feb 28, 2011, 05:00 AM

Because you are so special and she sees that in you!

PTSDlovemycats · Feb 28, 2011, 05:03 AM

Awe, thanks I never looked at it that way before. I though it was more that I am the weakest link sorta deal and need more time from her...

rainbow8 · Feb 28, 2011, 01:57 PM

I think my T told me she doesn't hold anyone else's hand, so I could wonder the same thing. She told me it was healing for me. I don't think she emails other clients either. Our Ts do what they think is best for us. Makes you feel special, doesn't it?!