[mixedup_emotions]

Just got back from my session with T. *sigh*

T almost canceled, as he was stuck in traffic on his way to the office. He seemed tired and somewhat distant. He usually stifles his yawns, but not today - and he yawned often. He seemed a little distracted...and less empathetic than usual.

I mostly recapped what went on this week, but his main focus was on the disappointment with the psych eval that my ex had done. It looked like my ex picked a forensic psychologist out of a bubble gum machine. So, I need to decide what I am going to do about it....but I don't have the energy right now. I will mull it over for a couple days and then decide how to handle it.

T was also pushing me to contact my neurologist to see if he can do something to stop this pain cycle since I've had this migraine for 3 weeks....since I'm not seeing the neurosurgeon until the end of the month.

Towards the end of the session, I felt like T was pushing me out the door (in a kind way though) saying that he needed to get something to eat before the next person came in - or he was going to have a sugar crash like I did on Tuesday. Had I known he hadn't eaten, I would've encouraged him to eat during our session. Maybe he would've been more....I don't know....more like "my T"....

Oh well. I'm a little disappointed, but such is life.

Thankfully, I have PC....

[PTSDlovemycats]

MUE- I am sorry that you had sucha crappy session also that you still have your migraine. That sucks. Hopefully your next session will be much better.

[zooropa]

(((((mue)))))

I hate that feeling of disconnectedness during and after sessions like that. You are right, such is life, and Ts have good and bad days just like we do, but it really sucks when you bear the brunt of Ts bad day. The good thing is, most likely the next time you see him he will be more present! I sure hope so.

[inbloom]

I just have to share that I have a personal pet peeve involving the yawning thing. I think that my T is just someone who yawns a lot, but seriously, every time he does, I want to just say "Am I friggin boring you??"

Anyway, I am sorry the session was off. I can always tell when my T is distracted and not entirely focused on me. It sucks, but I think that after seeing someone for any length of time, it's bound to happen now and again. Hope that the next time is much better.

[granite1]

i'm so sorry mue that would scare me afet that big rupture you had but i bet he was just hungry.are you seeing him again soon?what kind of phych did your ex pic?

[SpiritRunner]

So sorry it felt disappointing today.
I agree with your T tho, contacting your neurologist about this ongoing migraine would be a good idea. I'm concerned for you in that, too....it must be difficult! I've had migraines, but only for a day or two, not 3 weeks. I hope you get the care you need for that.
Your T probably was off because he needed to eat and re-fuel his mind! Generally, it's probably not a great thing for Ts to eat in front of clients. However, a couple times my T had to deal with a crisis over her lunch hour and missed her lunch break, too and my session was right after.....so I said it was OK for her to eat something while we talked. I'd rather that than maybe hear her tummy growl or have her not be as sharp or present because of hunger....

How weird - my T ate for the first time ever in my session this week. He said "I am going to do something I've never done before, but I need to eat a few nuts because I feel my blood sugar dropping" and he went to his desk and hand a handful of nuts. He offered some to me (twice), but I wasn't hungry. He HAS eaten things I've brought him (cookies or whatever) right when I've handed them to him

BUT!

I'm REALLY sorry your session was disappointing. I know that you really needed to go in and feel cared for, and it sounds like you didn't quite get what you needed. It's so hard when T is "off" and we leave unsatisfied.

I do think a neurologist is a good idea. I've been having lots of migraines and am considering seeing one. A mom I know just had a CT scan for headaches and found out she had some clots and had been having mini strokes. She is FINE, thankfully, but it was a bit of a wake up call.

Thinking of you and sending lots of caring from me

[Suratji]

Originally Posted by inbloom

I just have to share that I have a personal pet peeve involving the yawning thing. I think that my T is just someone who yawns a lot, but seriously, every time he does, I want to just say "Am I friggin boring you??"

Anyway, I am sorry the session was off. I can always tell when my T is distracted and not entirely focused on me. It sucks, but I think that after seeing someone for any length of time, it's bound to happen now and again. Hope that the next time is much better.

My goodness! Aren't we PAYING them to be attentive?? They shouldn't be 'off' unless they want to give us a discount. Thankfully, I've never had that experience.

Originally Posted by Suratji

My goodness! Aren't we PAYING them to be attentive?? They shouldn't be 'off' unless they want to give us a discount. Thankfully, I've never had that experience.

When my T is "off" for some reason, he always explains. It's rare, but it does happen. I've been seeing him twice a week for 3 1/2 years - there's no way he could be "on" every single time (although he almost always is).

He does stifle a yawn occasionally, and I DO say "are you bored?" and he actually checks in with himself and will tell me exactly what's going on...usually, he'll say "I'm really totally present, but I am a little tired". I believe him. I get REALLY sleepy and dissociative in therapy and sometimes just lay on the couch and hide and don't talk for a LONG time. And I like the lights dimmed. I don't know how the man stays awake sometimes.

[Sweetlove]

((((MUE))))

Yawning is one of the biggest frustrations in therapy for me. I understand that talking is his job and I yawn all the time at my job, so I can't get mad...everyone gets tired. But, there is that "I'm boring him and he's sick of me" feeling that I always get. He tries to hide it but I'm not stupid...I just have to remember that he's a human being too and gets tired just like me...but sometimes its hard!

Sorry you had such a hard time today, I hate when I leave feeling unsatisfied...like I still have more stuff left in me. I just tell myself that we have to have those "so-so" sessions so we can appreciate the great ones even more (usually it doesn't help though)

Hope you get some rest and feel a little better tomorrow

[WePow]

((((((((((( MUE))))))))))))))

[Liam Grey]

I'm sorry for your session.

I understand they are human just as us, but IMHO pushing you out (even gently) because he had to eat wasn't really professional/nice.

I'm totally comprehensive with a yawn here and there, if I feel that my T is still there and present (but again, I perfectly understand if others are annoyed at this)... but being sent away before time just piss me. If the situation will ever present to me, I'd much rather see my T eating something in front of me during session than this (so I can totally understand you saying "Had I known he hadn't eaten, I would've encouraged him to eat during our session. Maybe he would've been more....I don't know....more like "my T"....")...

Take care!

[Sweetlove]

How are you today MUE?? Thinking of you