[Suratji]

I had started another thread asking for tips/ideas on questions to ask T in regards to finding a way to self-disclose. I had some ideas of what to ask but if anyone has any more ideas, it would be greatly appreciated.

[sittingatwatersedge]

hi there,
I haven't gotten to all threads so I am not sure whether someone else suggested this, but you could just tell T that you are not sure how to begin and let him/her try to help you. Mine is very very gentle with it, she has 10000 ways of coming to the subject and even so if you don't feel you are ready, you need not talk about something. that's important to keep in mind.

I used to feel like I was going to go in, hand T a big knife and say, OK slice away; but it won't work like that Suratji, the T is not there to CUT you open. You have to be ready to open, so the light can come in. And it takes time, you can't force it.

I have been on the spot in the road where you are standing - in fact I revisit it - and it's hard, so hard. please go gently and let T help you.

[lastyearisblank]

When I have to say something in therapy that makes me nervous, sometimes I would say, "please don't react until I'm done." I didn't want any feedback, good or bad until the story was done. This was mostly at the beginning though before I was used to sharing.

Just read your other thread and saw the things about being nervous about the positive regard. Maybe you could even ask her first, "are you going to change how you feel about me if I tell you something now?"