Thanks to therapy I became a Sociopath

Please do not do it. It wont help you, you will feel more miserable that now. It will go away I promise. Mayby find another T or better join group therapy.
You know how it hurts so don't do it to somebody else.

I like so much of what Ygrec says here (and a lot of what the other commenters on this thread are saying). But I don't think it's always up to the client whether or not they fall for their therapist.

What we're talking about is a huge reason why therapy is dangerous. Here's the thing: the client comes to the therapist already wounded. The client is frantic, bleeding, susceptible, out of ideas, vulnerable like never before. And then, if all goes well, the client forms a special bond with the therapist. And that's supposed to happen.

So it's desirable for the progression of the work, but it's also really dangerous.

I used to kid my T that my feelings for him (I called it transference, he didn't like the term) were so awful for me that I felt like a cow on the way to slaughter. He made the experience nice, in his cozy office with the Turkish rug and the rice paper lamps, but I felt like I was on my way to slaughter nonetheless. But HE loved the process! I'm so glad one of us enjoyed it! He got a real kick out of playing therapy with me, and he never seemed to understand that he was mucking around in my psyche in a very dangerous way. I still resent it. There's nothing worse than falling for someone who can't return your feelings.

Some therapists handle the transference thing better than others. I still think it's a dangerous process. I keep thinking there's got to be some other way to make therapy work. It's like you come to the therapist with your arms broken, and then they break your legs too.

Look, if Proto was in a place where he could choose his reactions to therapy as if it were a game or a computer program, would he be in therapy in the first place? (Or - maybe he'd really need some therapy then!)

Even many high-functioning adults can't control every aspect of their emotions. (And why would you want to, anyway?) Feelings of love, especially, can descend without warning, and they're apt to turn the best of us into blithering idiots That's why they call them feelings. They're not logical, and we can't choose and reject them like Forest Gump's mother selecting bon bons from a box of chocolates!

Long way of saying that this therapy thing is so hard, so hard, so hard. As we all know! But yes, seconding the comments above that taking your anger out on someone else isn't really going to solve anything.

Therapy is for talking. Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. And Proto, I'm totally in your corner and getting where you're coming from! God, do I get it! I got over my T (and terminated him while I was at it), but I really don't envy you being in the thick of this right now. I do feel compassion for you.

FWIW: women therapists are not necessarily more compassionate than men. And yes, many of our relationships in life will be temporary. But most marriages don't end in divorce! Most marriages? Where'd you get that one??

The fact that I am socially stupid. I'm like one of those autistic people who just don't get it, who no matter how hard they try, they will always be out of sync when it comes to social interactions.

As I said, I went to therapy, felt attracted to the therapist, shared my feelings with the therapist, she took it calmly, told me it was a common reaction, told me it was nothing to be ashamed of, and sent me on my way. Very soon I shared with the therapist the fact that I did not like having feelings toward her, and felt distress as a result of those feelings. She seemed to think that my problem was that I felt embarrassed, so I actually had to repeat many times that I felt intense emotional pain, not shame or embarrassment. But because she did not help, I had an angry response and demanded that she help me do something about my feelings. She referred me to another T.

Obviously, I am not going to discuss the details of my therapy on a public forum, but all I can tell you is that the problem that brought me to therapy had nothing to do with relationships, just personal life problems.

I went to see a second therapist. A guy. He jumped in defense of the previous therapist and told me it was not her fault that I felt attracted to her. He accused me of being paranoid and did not even have the courtesy to acknowledge my pain. Regardless of whether I am or am not paranoid, and regardless of who - if anyone - is to blame, he did absolutely nothing to help me process what happened to me in my previous therapy, so I did not bother with that therapist again.

I would rather concentrate on solving the problem that brought me to therapy in the first place, because it actually impairs my ability to preserve my livelihood. I still haven't solved it and now I have a new problem that's getting in the way of solving the problem that actually affects my life.

One thing that bothers me is the fact that even random internet strangers like yourself understand the pain that I went through a lot better than my previous therapist did (at least as far as I was able to tell).

You know, I was under the impression that psychologists were really intelligent people who really understood human thoughts and human emotions. Maybe I was wrong.

To be honest, I think the only thing they can do to properly handle the transference is to not take people like us as clients. It's not like a magic word or a clever explanation of our thoughts and emotions is going to make the pain go away.

I thank you for your understanding. I wish my therapist had understood me as well as you do.