[Indie'sOK]

Instead of continuing to hijack Dismissed Feelings' thread about depth therapy, I hope it's alright that I start my own?

My T is a social worker and she mainly uses CBT, though I imagine like most therapies it is probably more eclectic. That's fine. But the fact is that I feel like it's a "treat the symptoms, not the cause" approach. I'm so insanely intrigued by deep self-analysis, even at my age, that I can't help but wonder if a deeper, more subconscious form of therapy would be better for me? Even if my issues are the ones CBT is used for (anxiety, mild depression, low self-esteem), I have a hard time wanting to get better without first understanding the roots of my problems. And isn't this essentially what depth therapy aims to do? I want to explore this deeper (no pun intended) with T but at the same time I'm worried she'll be hurt, maybe thinking that I'm not satisfied with what she's able to offer. And I don't want to leave her in search of someone more qualified for the type of therapy I'm looking for. I just met her in March after a painful breakup with my old T, and I'm still not over that, so switching Ts is out of the question. Not to mention that my parents can't afford more-qualified. Crappy insurance is still better than none at all, though.

I don't know what this thread is asking for, but I hope it makes sense to those reading it. Does anyone know where I'm coming from?
Thanks for reading,
Indie

[dinosaurs]

my t is a cbt t but he certainly doesn't just skim the surface (eg just trying to replace negative self talk). we've done very indepth work on why i'm having the problems i am and where they originated. i certainly wouldn't assume that your t won't help you deeply analyse things - especially if she says she is eclectic. you're best bet is to ask her if she's willing to explore things more deeply with you. btw i'd also bet t won't be hurt if you ask her about this - it helps her to know what works/doesn't work for you and how you would prefer to work.

[ECHOES]

I like this short description of depth therapy:
http://www.depththerapy.com/approach.html

another link: http://www.depththerapy.com/approach.html

One thing I find fascinating is how associations are made. In a session I may talk about many seemingly unrelated things, and my therapist responds and at the same time uses her "third ear" to hear the thread that runs through all I have talked about. It is modern psychoanalysis and lying on the couch isn't used a lot anymore, but the focus still is listening to unconscious.

It very much helps anxiety and depression by getting to their roots, and the self-awareness and insights that help us understand ourselves much better improves self-esteem.

Indie, if you are near a large city you might see if there is a psychoanalytic institute that offers depth therapy; some do and for a small fee.

My T is a social worker too, MSW and a licensed mental heatlh counselor LMHC, who has been a therapist for 30 years. I found her by contatcting the pyschoanalytic institute near me for a referral to a candidate. She was undergoing her psychoanalytic training at that time, and has since completed it but she remains very much interested in her field and loves to continue learning.

It is okay to not be satisfied with what your T has to offer. Or you can be satisfied to a point, but want more. It isn't a personal rejection of her, and she knows that and she can take hearing your thoughts. She is interested in all of your thoughts. It might lead to a very good discussion! She may know a colleague who accepts insurance and does depth therapy (and knows how to bill the insurance so they will cover it) and that might be something to consider. Therapy is about you.

[wheeler]

I was actually in a very similiar situation. My T-at-the-time was a very nice woman and I liked her and her approach was more CBT-like. At first I thought that style would work for me, but after a couple of months I realized that I still needed more, I needed a deeper connection.

I finally was able to broach the conversation with her, although the problem is never as clear coming out of my mouth as it is in my head. She tried to change her approach a bit, but in the end we both knew it wasn't going to work. So I started looking for a new T.

At first I didn't tell her about looking for a new T, I was afraid she would be upset, but I didn't like lying to her. If felt like I was cheating. Eventually I told her, which actually helped our relationship for a while. In the end, after interviewing over 6 or 7 T's I finally what I think is now my perfect match! And oddly enough, my T-at-the-time found my new T for me.

So, I guess I would suggest talking about it a bit more with your T, but in the end it's your decision, and you know what you need.

Good luck

[Elli-Beth]

I like that I'm doing depth therapy for that exact reason- it goes for the causes and not just the symptoms. The cool part is that my T does still help with symptoms when things are at their worst, so I can leave his office and be able to function, but I know it's going to be a long term deal and eventually the symptoms will fade when the causes are solved.

As far as the cost, just be bold and call around and ask. My guy has a sliding scale fee. A lot of people might overlook him as a possibility because he is VERY qualified and looks expensive, but for those who ask and need it, he charges just a token fee.

My t is primarily cbt, but eclectic like yours. We do quite a bit of in-depth analysis. You might just talk to your t about what you were expecting from therapy. If she is eclectic, she may adjust her methods with you. Communication is really invaluable.

[Indie'sOK]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

My t is primarily cbt, but eclectic like yours. We do quite a bit of in-depth analysis. You might just talk to your t about what you were expecting from therapy. If she is eclectic, she may adjust her methods with you. Communication is really invaluable.

This is what I will probably end up doing..I really like my T and have grown attached to her. Hopefully she'll be willing to help me on this. I'll talk to her about it and let you know what she says.

Thanks for your replies everyone!

[learning1]

Originally Posted by wheeler

I was actually in a very similiar situation. My T-at-the-time was a very nice woman and I liked her and her approach was more CBT-like. At first I thought that style would work for me, but after a couple of months I realized that I still needed more, I needed a deeper connection.

I finally was able to broach the conversation with her, although the problem is never as clear coming out of my mouth as it is in my head. She tried to change her approach a bit, but in the end we both knew it wasn't going to work. So I started looking for a new T.

At first I didn't tell her about looking for a new T, I was afraid she would be upset, but I didn't like lying to her. If felt like I was cheating. Eventually I told her, which actually helped our relationship for a while. In the end, after interviewing over 6 or 7 T's I finally what I think is now my perfect match! And oddly enough, my T-at-the-time found my new T for me.

So, I guess I would suggest talking about it a bit more with your T, but in the end it's your decision, and you know what you need.

Good luck

That's pretty similar to me, 'cept I didn't tell my social worker t who I'd been talking with for a few months. And I already knew the t I thought I wanted to go back to. I wish I had told the social worker because he was very nice. I never figured out how to do it because I was afraid he'd think I was putting him down as not being "deep" enough or intelligent enough. I also wanted to keep my options open about going back to him and I was afraid telling him would make a mess of that. (hmm, as I'm writing, I'm thinking i actually made it more difficult if I wanted to go back to him by not telling him. ick. I'm glad it doesn't sound like you're likely to do that.) Now I think I might have been able to explain that I actually thought he was nice and intelligent, but just didn't have the training to do what I wanted.

I do think having a t who has the training and practice to talk about more in depth stuff is helpful, although nothing wrong with trying to see how it goes with your current t. I also had trouble when I was younger with finding a t who did what I wanted because most the t's on my insurance were social workers who probably didn't have that training. I see some people on here said some social workers do get the training though.

[ECHOES]

It is the insurance company's goal that therapy be short term.
When my insurance changed and my T was no longer covered, she wanted to know if I wanted to change to someone my insurance covers. I did not (huge deductible anyway). It was then that she told me that therapists my not list depth therapy or may only list short term therapy or CBT or Solution Focused, etc because then the insurance company will want them for network providers; however, she said that many do depth therapy as well. So, definitely it is a good idea to ask!

Yes it was me who said my T is a MSW and LMHC and also has a certificate in psychoanalysis. I've had a few, and she is the best T I've had.

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by Indie'sOK

I have a hard time wanting to get better without first understanding the roots of my problems.

I think it can actually go in the opposite direction. You can use the methods that your therapist offers to get the most pressing of your symptoms under control, then do the depth work. With a firm foundation of your anxiety and depression symptoms under control, the depth work can be less wrenching.

Why did you quit with your first therapist? Was he/she also unable to offer depth therapy?

Since you don't want to switch right now, why don't you talk with your T about your desire to go deep in therapy at some point, and see if she can offer that. Maybe you will be surprised! If she can't offer that, continue to work with her on what she can help with. Once you are done with that, move on to a new T. You can also get the symptoms under control with your current T and leave her but not start immediately with a new one, if your insurance isn't in place. Then in the future when you have the funds and insurance, go deep!

My first T was a social worker and had a strong CBT influence. We worked together for 9 months off and on, and she did help me with my worst symptoms. Then we reached a plateau and I realized she could no longer help me. I had outgrown her and now needed a T with different abilities and skills. There was no shame in that. She offered a valuable service, I took advantage of it, paid her fees, and then moved on when I needed a different service.

[sunrise]

I had another idea, Indie, for finding a depth therapist within your budget. The university I am at has a Master's program for humanistic/existential therapy (can't get deeper than that!). They have a clinic associated with this program where the therapists in training see clients for a very low rate. (This is not the same as the university counseling center, which offers brief therapies.) At this clinic, the trainees have close oversight from an experienced humanistic/existential therapist. The fees are very low, and you get someone who wants to go deep with you and has training in just that. So you could look around at universities in your area and find ones with therapist programs in the depth therapies, and they will most likely have an associated clinic. Good luck.

[*doodles*]

I agree with just trying to talk to her. My T does CBT, but when I told her I thought I needed more, she has definitely switched gears and we are doing a lot more in depth work/trauma work, etc. It's definitely worth a shot!

[Indie'sOK]

Originally Posted by sunrise

Why did you quit with your first therapist? Was he/she also unable to offer depth therapy?

I didn't quit...she did. Old T was gradually switching over to a new job and didn't let me know first, so all I knew was that she had another job in addition to her work as a T. There was much confusion and by the time I was able to get a hold of her to make a session, she gave me two options that day: make that my last session, or have one more with her. I chose the former and set up an appointment with a lady who is now my current T.

[Indie'sOK]

Originally Posted by doodle3609

I agree with just trying to talk to her. My T does CBT, but when I told her I thought I needed more, she has definitely switched gears and we are doing a lot more in depth work/trauma work, etc. It's definitely worth a shot!

This sounds very encouraging. It's not that I'm worried she won't want to go deeper with me, it's that she won't be able to due to lack of training, or experience, or etc etc etc...is your T a social worker? I'm just realllllly hesitant to leave mine because I just met her and really like her and there's always the fact that I'm overruled by my parents for the next year and a half.

[Indie'sOK]

Originally Posted by wheeler

...I realized that I still needed more, I needed a deeper connection.

Exactly my case.