Also losing interest....or not?

SoupDragon's thread kind of brought to the surface something I've been worrying about for a while. Therapy for me just doesn't carry the spark that it used to...and I've been seeing one therapist or another for a little over two and a half years. I feel like I'm almost growing bored with it, that I'm not making progress, know that I never will really figure myself out, and am lost even knowing what exactly I'm supposed to be figuring out in the first place. Someone on SoupDragon's thread responded that this lack of interest could be a sign that therapy is not satisfying like it should be - like we want it to be. Some of you know the story with my Old T. Well, after she left me with my now-Current T, I still carry some resentment even though that was months ago. I liked my OT better, but my CT is a better therapist all-around. She and I work well together, but lately our relationship hasn't been as strong as it could be because of her insistence that I have a condition I really don't. Both these things, though past issues, have left me skeptical of the whole entire thing. Maybe I'm just sick of thinking about my issues, of analyzing them to death. I don't want to be. I want to experience the mind-blowing intimate conversations with my T that I've fantasized about. I want this whole thing to become new again.......
And yet I'm afraid of ever leaving her.

Does any of this stick out to anyone? I need to talk to her about this. My session is this Wednesday at 9am. I'm afraid I won't be able to "get into it" as deeply as I'd like to because of it being so early in the morning My appointments are almost always at night.

I am just posting so that you'll know that you are not alone. I've been into therapy as well for 2 years and lately I've been feeling that I'm not making any progress. I'm stuck. I will write more when you let us know how it went on Wednesday, in my opinion you should really share what you wrote here with your T. It is crucial that she knows your feelings and maybe by discussing it together you'll come to understand better why you feel this way. Maybe it has to do with your previous T, maybe you have blocked yourself as a way to feel more secure and protected. Just random thoughts, but I think it is important that you share them with your T and let us know!

PS. I hate morning sessions! I only had to go twice in the morning but I was soooo sleepy that I just wanted my bed! You got to have the proper atmosphere to have a productive session if you ask me!

Or perhaps nobody really even cares.........

Thanks Harvest Moon

Nope, I care, just been really wrapped up in my own stuff lately, and it's hard to offer insight to others when I feel like my own world is going sideways.

Here's my thoughts, for what they are worth...

First - talk to your T about this. Tell her that you don't feel like you're making progress, that you're losing interest, that her diagnosis still bothers you. Since therapy is a relationship, one person alone can't solve problems in the relationship; you have to work together.

Maybe it's time to stop analyzing your issues and talk to your T about ways to deal with them now. Perhaps if you can ask your T to help you put together some kind of plan for where you want to go from here, you'll start to feel interested in therapy again.

I started to lose interest a few months ago, and it's because I'd realized that while I'd shared 90% of my issues with my T, that's all I'd done. Just shared them. I now needed a plan to actually deal with them. So, finally, I just told my T that...I told her that I need her help in figuring out how to deal with all this stuff, because I don't know where to go. I need a template, a plan, something to guide me. My T was thrilled, and instantly launched in to planning mode with me, and it revitalized therapy for me. Of course, it made it difficult and emotional again, but that's all part of therapy for me.

Yes, you're right, and I realize now that that is part of the problem. That's how therapy has always been for me - I sit down and try to describe in excruciating detail all that woes me, but we never really think of a way to start dealing with anything...good point Rhi - thanks so much for your advice

It would be sad to lose a good relationship over an intellectual disagreement. I find that psychotherapy is largely "undirected" (or perhaps "client directed" is more accurate), which means that diagnosis is pretty much irrelevant. My T is more interested in "symptoms" than "complexes". Even if you do have XYZ disorder, you won't exhibit all the signs, certainly not in textbook fashion.

If your T is worthless or is treating you according to a wrong diagnosis, then that would be a reason to leave. Otherwise, one option is to agree to disgaree and get on with the real work.

However, if this really is a dealbreaker for you, there is something else you might try. You say, "So you think I have XYZ disorder. Please get out the book and we'll go through the symptoms one at a time and see if we agree that I have them." If you find one particular symptom you say doesn't fit, tell her why and ask for her reasons too. The Devil is in the details, but so is the resolution.

An example. My GP said I was depressed and my T disagreed. But she didn't leave it at that. T got down the book and shot down my alleged symptoms one by one. "One bad night is not a sleep disruption. It was hot that night. Nobody slept well."

But the big point I'm trying to make is, that it is much more helpful to talk about your feelings for spiders that to argue if you are arachnophobic or not.

Right, I agree. I told her in our last session that I'd really appreciate it if, quite frankly, she'd just drop the matter altogether. I'm pretty sure she did, although every now and then when I'd talk and part of what I was saying would fit her dx, I could sense her interest perking up. But if it does come up again I will do what you suggest and go through the DSM definition with her, symptom by symptom. I'm sure that would convince her otherise