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#1
Jan 25, 2012, 09:25 PM
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it was a good session, i guess.
i tried to explain to her the whole 'not real' thing. don't know if i explained it well ('cause it makes no sense, really  ).we talked about grieving ... and how to grieve (and how I don't know how to grieve) so i have home work toward closure/acceptance on a relationship that i never fully grieved. we talked about how the end of sessions being hard for me lately since we had the discussion about how i felt about her. it think it's gonna be hard for a while cause right after my session, i'm in tears tho I don't really know why. i'm ... just ... sad. how can you resolve emotions if you don't know where they are coming from?!  ugh. i wanted to go deeper ... and I'm glad we are... but i'm looking forward to another upsurge in therapy where it feels good and i'm not hurting so much. there's just so much inside that wants & needs healing. ouch. it hurts. 
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~ 
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 Anonymous100153, Anonymous32887, Anonymous33425, lostmyway21, pbutton, rainbow8, Unrigged64072835, vanessaG, Wren_, yang0868
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 CantExplain, kitten16
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#2
Jan 25, 2012, 09:31 PM
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Just wanted to offer (((hugs))))
__________________
"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second." "You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. |
| rainbow_rose
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#3
Jan 25, 2012, 09:32 PM
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 It sounds like you did get some stuff out. 
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| rainbow_rose
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#4
Jan 25, 2012, 09:34 PM
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Quote:
 I so understand this place right now. I'm sorry it's SO painful  I truly truly believe that we go through the darkness to get to the light. I've experienced it so many times in my own therapy...but when we're in the darkness, it can just seem so never-ending. It's not never-ending. You won't be right here forever. Sending gentle hugs
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| rainbow_rose
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#5
Jan 25, 2012, 09:48 PM
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rainbow rose
. It sounds like your session went well. I wish I could say the same about mine. We'll make it through this somehow. Hang in there. I'm sorry that despite having you ride along in my pocket, I didn't have the courage to talk to T about my feelings about her. I'm proud of you for not turning away like I did with my T.
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| rainbow_rose
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#6
Jan 25, 2012, 11:05 PM
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Rainbow...sounds like you had a good session. You are doing grief work; I'll be doing that very soon myself. You're helping me be brave with your testimony. Thanks for that and
to you!
__________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. - Henry David Thoreau |
| rainbow_rose
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#7
Jan 25, 2012, 11:32 PM
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My T always quotes Robert Frost: "The best way out is always through." You're going "through" right now. I always wanted to go deeper in therapy too, but this is the first T I'm doing it with. It's definitely not easy but I think it's worth it.
You said "there's so much inside that wants & needs healing". So, it's going to take time but it sounds like you have an excellent T who will help you heal. Grief work is difficult but you WILL feel better afterwards. Do you think the tears are from the unresolved grief, maybe? I know I cry in the car just because I hate to leave my T and the connected feelings. Even if the session is hard, it's difficult to leave. My first T said I had to learn to have "part of her inside of me". If we can do that, it's easier.
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| rainbow_rose
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#8
Jan 26, 2012, 08:30 AM
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grief work IS hard ... and we keep coming back to it so i guess it's important.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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| rainbow8
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| CantExplain
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#9
Jan 26, 2012, 09:09 AM
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I wish I had an answer for you rainbow_rose; I struggle with the same thing. For me I think it's more attachment-stuff, but maybe it's abandonment and grief? Or maybe they're all tied together?
Take care, and you're not alone.
__________________
wheeler |
| rainbow_rose
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#10
Jan 26, 2012, 08:12 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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#11
Jan 26, 2012, 08:30 PM
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((((((rainbowrose)))))) i wish i knew the answer also on how to resolve those emotions ... hopefully keeping on talking to your T ... will, just wish it didn't take so long
__________________
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| rainbow_rose
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#12
Jan 27, 2012, 08:19 AM
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Quote:
thanks, tigergirl
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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