[Cotton ball]

I just found out this week that my therapist is retiring. I'm so upset and sad. He was a good therapist and I really trusted and felt safe with him. He not only understood me (or my issues) but also understood the patholoy of my ex.
He as always was wonderful, offered to help me find another therapist and encouraged me to not give up...even gave me his #, in case I ever needed anything. I will not call him however I can't fight back the tears. I didn't show it to him but it broke my heart....and it took everything within in me not to start crying in front of him about that.
Theres no way in hell I want to start over with someone new. I just can't.
I've had such crappy therapists in the past and this one was a godsend. It's ironic as he was an older man who did pro-bono work through a local church. If I had to choose initially those would have been 3 strikes against him.It's funny how life can be.
I'm really sad and fighting the tears because now I really have no one to talk to who's gonna get it. It took a year to trust him and he earned every ounce of respect and trust that I had for him.
I'm just really sad and don't know what I'm going to do now. I'm an emotional mess..literally. This one I just can't ignore or wipe under the rug.

[stopdog]

I am sorry to hear about your therapist. Do you get a wind down period or is it sudden?

Cotton ball. I'm sorry, that sucks!

[Cotton ball]

No, It's not like that. We will have 3 more sessions together. He is very professional and kind. He wouldn't just say see you and good luck. He even offered (knowing my trust issues) to have his replacement do a group therapy session together. I don't know. ?
I'm still so sad and don't want to start over with someone new.
I can't believe I'm crying over my therapist.

we completely understand how you feel. we recently just started over with someone new after being with our last one for close to 7 years. For us it didnt end well but that doesnt mean we didnt have a hard time with it. if you need to talk we are here to listen♥

[likelife]

I'm sorry this is so difficult. It sounds like perhaps the news was a bit surprising?

[Cotton ball]

Thanks you guys.
Yep the news really knocked the wind out of me. I just wasn't expecting it.

[taylor43]

Im so sorry, i hope you can find someone just as good to help you. (((((Hugs)))))))) I got extremly attached to my school counsellor it was so hard when she left. I cried for months over her and it took me along time to trust another counsellor.

[Asiablue]

Cotton ball this must be such a shock for you, and i totally understand your reticence to start all over again....i'm exhausted even imagining starting over with someone new!!
Would the transition be easier if he could let you keep in touch via email of something?

[Cotton ball]

Thanks-
No I don't think that would be appropriate. He is a therapist not a friend. I'm sure if I suggested it or let him know my feelings he would be very willing to stay in touch as long as he saw I was building a new relationship with a new therapist. He is a very good therapist and very kind person-without crossing professional boundaries.
Damn he was really one of the good guys- crazy thing is we were really starting to open some scary doors for me.
Ohh well. I'm thankfull I was able to work with him...but very sad to see him go. Ugh!!! LOL.. it''s not like I can say NO DON'T RETIRE I NEED YOU! How wierd would that be.
I will however write him a letter after our last session to let him know how much I appreciated his feedback and our sessions together. He did make a difference for me...I'll acknowledge that and move on.
...Looks like I'll be doing allot of blogging because I'm not starting over again with someone new.

[mcl6136]

[quote=Cotton ball;2296426]Thanks-
No I don't think that would be appropriate. He is a therapist not a friend. I'm sure if I suggested it or let him know my feelings he would be very willing to stay in touch as long as he saw I was building a new relationship with a new therapist. He is a very good therapist and very kind person-without crossing professional boundaries.
Damn he was really one of the good guys- crazy thing is we were really starting to open some scary doors for me.
Ohh well. I'm thankfull I was able to work with him...but very sad to see him go. Ugh!!! LOL.. it''s not like I can say NO DON'T RETIRE I NEED YOU! How wierd would that be.

It would not be very weird at all. At least not in my book but then again, I got a really really high bar for weird...just ask Hankster

[with or without you]

Ugh, I am sorry Cotton. I believe my T is in her late 50's and I worry about this from time to time.

[Perna]

I'm sorry; my T gave me about 18 months notice she was retiring and that was a difficult ride but helped some too, speeding up my work.

I'm really sorry. I know I would certainly cry, too, if my T left so don't feel bad about being sad. It is sad. Take care of yourself, all the best to you

I'm so sorry, Cotton Ball. I truly know what you are going through. My first therapist retired a number of years ago and I missed her horribly. I knitted her a beautiful fisherman's knit afgan to keep her warm during her retirement She gave me a lot of notice and we worked hard up until the very last session. I think of her with great fondness but the missing part lessened over time AND I was able to find the right therapist to continue the journey with . . . .after a bit of testing the waters. I hope things go well for you.

[critterlady]

I'm so sorry, Cotton Ball. I know how hard it is - my previous (and beloved) T moved to another state. I cried every time we talked about him leaving and I became a blubbering fool in our last session. He was wonderful about it, but it was so hard.

One of the first things I asked my new T (and I've asked him a few times since then, too) was if he was planning on moving, retiring or otherwise leaving his practice. He assures me that he is not.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by Cotton ball

I can't fight back the tears. I didn't show it to him but it broke my heart....and it took everything within in me not to start crying in front of him about that.

I'm sorry you couldn't let him see how much he means to you.

[growlycat]

Oh cotton ball---I am so sorry!

This hits home because I have a T that is in his 60's and both of his parents had/have alzheimer's disease. I worry about him all of the time.

I'm hoping for both of us really that there is "therapy after therapy"