[dub_phantom]

Hey guys, I know I'm new here and haven't talked much at all but there's something I'd really like to know about... what is therapy like? I can't imagine the idea of going to a new person that I've never met before and just opening my life to him/her. The only people I'm really close to are my family and a few friends from back home, and even with all of them I'm usually trying to hide my moods, how I'm feeling, and so on. I've known my family my whole life obviously and the few very good friends I have for 8 years or more, I don't think I could ever open up to someone I see only weekly or less for a very, very long time. If it's something else I'm just going to fail at, what's the point in going? I guess I'd just like to hear how some of you guys handle it.

[CantExplain]

Hi phantom!

Therapy is painful and hard work, but there are moments of bliss and it does get easier as you go on.

For details, read the other threads on this forum!

[mommyof2girls]

It is at first a little odd to go to a complete stranger and open up about things in your life, but if you do find a t that you can really connect with, its really cool that you can discuss anything with them and not be judged......

It's hard work, painful at times, joyous at other times, it's a journey that encompasses every emotion a human can possibly feel and then some, well this from my experience anyways. I won't pretend to speak for anyone else of course! I'm always learning something new along the way. Oh and the not being judged part is just the best thing in the world.

[tkdgirl]

From what I understand you can't actually fail at therapy since everyone's experience is different. I havent been going as long as alot of people here at PC. For me getting the courage just to go was half the battle. My T is non-judgemental unlike people IRL so it makes talking about things a bit easier plus there is no pressure and you get to work at your own pace at least thats how it is in my case. I still haven't totally opened up with T, I think it's a process that takes time. The nice part is you get to control the flow of information.

[rainbow_rose]

it's the hardest and bestest thing i've ever done. for me, i had to let go of trying to control or understand the process and just trust it - that has been key - not easy, but very rewarding.

[Nightlight]

I've always been really, really private. No one in my family knew about my struggles even though I was really really struggling with life by about 11 years old, and had been so unhappy for years before that. I had absolutely no practice telling anyone about my struggles, no practice sharing the real me. My therapist helped me learn to talk and say things, and 3 years on she continues to help me, every step of the way. She's been so patient and an absolute lifesaver. She's helped me make really practical positive changes to my life. Before I went to see her (I was taken in by a family member who finally realised that I was not okay) I had no hope or expectations of improving. I had no concept of being able to be helped by someone else, and given how private I am and how complex ( I thought) my problems were, I thought nobody in the world could help me, not even in the tiniest way...and I was so wrong. If you think even for a second you could benefit from the help, then you probably can. It isn't always fast, or easy...but it's worth it. Life is short...and it's hard. A good therapist can help you improve what you need to improve, and help you to lead a life that's happier and easier. It's totally worth it.

[elliemay]

Therapy is a place and a time where you don't have to keep secrets, or yourself hidden unless you want to at first.

It shouldn't be just pouring out your story however, it's a place to just be you, have that accepted and work on making yourself better.

You will begin to look at your past and how it's affecting your current situation. Over time you should begin to recognize when it is your past speaking versus when it is you.

It will help reign in your emotions by allowing you to express them and realizing that you didn't go under, you weren't overwhelmed and no one was hurt by them.

Over time you will regain control and freedom over your life.

It's the hardest work I've ever done and I've done some pretty rough stuff.

You don't need to open up until you feel comfortable. At the first session, my current T said he liked to get family info because he specializes in family of origin therapy. I wasn't there to discuss my family at all - I had something going on in my life that was why I went into therapy. But -I respected that it was important to him to have that background info and that it was only one session anyway.

It gave us a chance to start getting to know each other and to size each other up. The second session we got into what brought me there. Developing trust and being able to open up takes time, at least for me. No way am I going to walk in and just spill my guts to a stranger. So take your time, and don't feel pressured to talk about anything you don't want to - yet. Good luck!