[jazzy123456]

When talking about ending therapy- my therapist talked a lot about her "wanting" to support me and me not fully allowing her too due to issues of trust and past hurt-- Makes sense. I know I'm not the only one. So, I opt' out to take a one month break from therapy... how does that sound? It's almost like I just need to take a break so I can remember that there was a time when I didn't give a crap about meeting up with someone for once a week, where all I did was find ways to be strong on my own...It's been 2 years of therapy- I have taken breaks but, no longer then 2 and a half weeks probably- and this was with my old therapist. My issue with quitting cold turkey is- idk how much sense that makes when I am going to be challenging myself more then I ever have in my life-come August. In August_ I will be working as a resident assistant, in charge of facilitating and creating a positive living experience for 55 residents. If anyone has read my posts over the past 2 years, this involves stretching myself to a place where I haven't been stretched before... I've been very focused on work and school but, this job will be a whole new one for me and with my issues with depression, illness, food etc. it just doesn't make sense for me to stop something when I am now going to be doing something that would require so much more effort on my part. Anyway, I don't have a lot of money for therapy either- which is why it makes sense to take a break but,

1. would you listen or feel able to go along with your therapists idea of lowering your sliding scale fee below your usual payment cus she insists that it's okay-?& Right now my fee is 25 dollars but, no job at the moment-and I'm a college student... but, how much lower could she go!? lol I just told her I felt "worthless" which I did at that moment- like how could I pay her so little!? I'm sure she gets money in addition-since they are a nonprofit and her parents are therapists and own the business but, still... lol...

And

2. whats the longest and shortest break you've ever taken from therapy?
what was the best and worst part of your "break from therapy" experience?

[SoupDragon]

I am always so ambivalent about therapy - a real push / pull which I understand is common.

Before Xmas, I was struggling financially and did enforce a 3 week break with my T. T wasn't keen for me to do this, but I did anyway. It was really hard for me and I understood why T had been reluctant for me to do it. However unless I had tried I think I would have continued to wonder how it would be, so I guess I learnt from it. It did make me feel more distant from T for a few weeks afterwards.

I think it seems totally rational and sensible considering your circumstances for you to accept a price reduction from your T. However I also know for me when my T suggested this, that pride or whatever it was, got in the way and I couldn't accept his offer.

The longest break i have had is 7 weeks, and i am about to have a break of that length again soon as i am going overseas. The best part is not having to pay out the money each week , and the worst part is that i miss her terribly and feel like i am going to explode with thoughts by the end of it. I also struggle immensely with returning, as i feel an enforced break may be the chance to make a clean break. Mmmmm, all so confusing!!

[mixedup_emotions]

I'm glad you posted this question, because I am considering taking a break or discontinuing as well. I know that what happened at my last session has something to do with it, but financially, I'm drowning....So, I have to really consider it.

As far as the idea of lowering the fees, I can imagine feeling the same way - it would create a further imbalance in the relationship. But, it may be worthwhile to ask your T directly why she feels it's ok for her to accept a lower amount.

I have never taken a break from therapy....although due to vacations, I did go about 3 weeks without seeing him once (after seeing him 2-3x/week). I managed better than I thought I would, but it was difficult to reconnect. I spend so much time keeping my feelings buried, so it took a while to adapt to the therapy environment again.

[WikidPissah]

1) T has offered "no copay" quite a few times (he would still get the insurance portion) for extra sessions...but I won't accept it. I personally have a thing about paying my own way in life. I don't think it's wrong for someone else to do it though.

2) I took about a 3 month break when I had cancer, I couldn't afford the cancer treatments and T. I am thinking about taking a few months off now while I am trying to get off medications...I am wasting a lot of time/$$ talking about withdrawal instead of life.

[stopdog]

1. If I was getting something out of therapy and could truly not pay the co-pay and did not fear a secret cost or obligation to the therapist, I can see taking the therapist up on her offer. For me, I could not get past the therapist doing a favor - what is the secret cost or expectation from the therapist. IF that is not your issue - then why not do it. I do not get concerned about taking care of the therapist - I assume they would not offer something that would put them in jeopardy= taking care of the therapist is not among my particular issues.
I usually only stop for a couple of weeks, but last year the one went on vacation for three weeks and I cancelled for 4 weeks so there was a seven week break. The first week was hard but after that I was fine. I almost did not go back. I probably should not have.

[critterlady]

Originally Posted by jazzy123456

It's almost like I just need to take a break so I can remember that there was a time when I didn't give a crap about meeting up with someone for once a week, where all I did was find ways to be strong on my own

Did finding ways to be strong on your own work for you? Or was it not working and you entered therapy to help you find those ways? If so, have you found them or are you still working on that? It sounds from your post that you might still be having trouble at least with trust issues.

You might want to think about your reasons for wanting a break. Many times people have the urge to take a break or terminate when they're on the verge of getting to the really hard stuff. I know I have because, frankly, it's scary. But some of the most valuable work often comes from sticking it out and working through those times.

Let your therapist set her boundaries on fees. She wouldn't offer anything she's not willing and happy to do. They're usually very good about their limits, for precisely the reason that then their clients don't have to worry about them.

[adel34]

Hi,
I wouldn't worry about the lower fee. Consider it a blessing that she's willing to be flexible. I'm on SSI and so have limited means for therapy, and I've interviewed many therapists who for whatever reason can't slide their fee.
Secondly, If taking a break feels right for you then go for it. I'd make sure to come back around August since it sounds like you'll have a lot going on then. The longest break I had from therapy was about a year and a half. Had a really crappy therapist sophomore year of high through, through summer of that next year. So took a break senior year of high school, and was a total mess by the end of the year. I was just keeping way too much stuff inside and basically had a breakdown. Got my depression diagnosis though. Which was good. Hope this helps.