[Silent_tsol]

Ok, I've never been one to remember my dreams. Usually I get one once in a while but never very often or in a lot of detail. I've started taking 6mg melatonin at night so I can get tired and actually sleep. I like it because any other sleeping pill I've tried has made me drowsy well into the next day.

Since I started though, I've been remembering my dreams. A lot of them, in DETAIL. They aren't awful dreams but they are...n't rainbows and sunshine. T said she's never heard of anyone saying this about taking melatonin (only that it makes your hands swell sometimes). So now here I'm posting
1) I think the answer you're all thinking is, well if you don't want the dreams, stop taking the melatonin. Try something else. But I also feel drawn to the dreams. Like I've finally gotten them - so I'm not missing out on that part of life, and I don't want to lose them. (Even though I know a lot of people don't remember their dreams). Like I addicted to the search of learning something from them, even if they are completely overwhelming me in waking life.
2) I kind of feel like I must be crazy, not normal if I have a reaction T has never heard of (even though she's never claimed to be the foremost expert of melatonin or sleep or anything like that).

And of course it's Monday so I'm having my weekly panic debate over whether or not to email her and book appt, or maybe I don't need therapy this week, or ever. Or maybe I do need it, or maybe I shouldn't need it. But I'd miss it if I didn't go. I didn't like when I missed a week a little while ago.

I just need to CALM DOWN but I don't feel like I can. Maybe it's because I stopped taking the ssri, and don't consider this panic enough for a benzo. Maybe I shouldn't have stopped taking them. I just didn't feel like doctor was listening - I wasn't depressed before I started them (for anxiety) but I was when I started. So it didn't feel worth it.

Sorry this got so long, thanks for listening

Well, I'm no medical professional (and I suspect your T isn't, either) but there are a lot of articles in PubMed about the effect of melatonin on REM sleep and dream activity. It doesn't look as if the effect you describe is unusual or abnormal at all.

The one thing I know about sleep is that if we get enough sleep, we do dream, even if we don't always remember the dreams in the morning. Unless your dreams are very disturbing, my layman's guess is that sleep deprivation is going to be worse than having unpleasant dreams. And sometimes dreams can tell us things that our waking brain hides from us.

I think you should go to T this week, and discuss this with her.

[pbutton]

Melatonin definitely enhances my dreams. I don't have pleasant dreams, so it isn't a welcome side effect.