[geez]

I thought I would post as things have developed and I'm now at another crossroads.

I emailed marriage T again to tell her I may need the name of a new T as I'm leaning towards not going to T2 anymore (I am going to give it 1 - 2 appointments and see how I feel).

AND that I'm interested in joining the support group she invited me to (marriage T) (about people contemplating bariatric surgery). She invited me to join the group as someone who was morbidly obese and lost weight through other means. She thinks it would be good for the group to see an example and to share my story about my weight loss journey.

Long story short marriage T told me that T1 just recently got certified to do EMDR!!!! ( I talked to T1 briefly about my situation with T2s time management and T1 didn't mention the fact that she recently got certified. - but we had a nice talk and she said she was proud of me for my accomplishments and hard work .

Sooooooo

T1 is on vacation this week so do I then contact her about EMDR when she's back in town? She's not a 'trauma specialist' per se but the fact that I trust her 100% and now she does EMDR does that count for something? I'm considering calling her next week when she's back and asking her about it and if she would do EMDR in addition to therapy again and help me with a few other things... (I am posting the other things in the abuse forum and need some advice/help).

The universe works in strange ways!

[Open Eyes]

geez, it is interesting that T 1 is doing EMDR now. You could try that, some people feel it helps others don't feel it helped them at all.

I still think that you should see if you can work through this issue with T2, it would be for "you". Ofcourse the decision is really up to you.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes

[geez]

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

geez, it is interesting that T 1 is doing EMDR now. You could try that, some people feel it helps others don't feel it helped them at all.

I still think that you should see if you can work through this issue with T2, it would be for "you". Ofcourse the decision is really up to you.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes

Trying to work it out with T2 will only be for 'me'. I'm not holding back and I'm going to ask T about her 'not angry with you/at you right now' and see where that leads.

Keep you posted!

[Perna]

I forget if you asked her, "Are you angry at/with me?" If I had asked that and my T answered, "I'm not angry at you right now" I would have taken it to be she may have been angry before and reserved the right to be feel angry again but was not, right now, in this instance. I would be glad of the specificity/clarification, would maybe get that my t believes one is not, generally, "angry", over a period of time but for a specific incident and, if brought up at the time, that can be worked through. I would be encouraged that she said she was not angry with me "now", in "this" discussion.

[geez]

Originally Posted by Perna

I forget if you asked her, "Are you angry at/with me?" If I had asked that and my T answered, "I'm not angry at you right now" I would have taken it to be she may have been angry before and reserved the right to be feel angry again but was not, right now, in this instance. I would be glad of the specificity/clarification, would maybe get that my t believes one is not, generally, "angry", over a period of time but for a specific incident and, if brought up at the time, that can be worked through. I would be encouraged that she said she was not angry with me "now", in "this" discussion.

I didn't ask her if she was angry at me as a direct question. She was very uncomfortable and was holding back from saying anything to me (probably how I look to most T's when they ask me to speak about something). We/I was were discussing how I felt she was defensive with me when I brought up I was angry about her tardiness the previous appointment and how I felt she was being very defensive when I brought it up ( in the previous session her take it or leave it attitude of this is just one of my faults, I'm not perfect and 'I can help you find another therapist'). That's when she let slip out of her mouth: " I'm not angry with you right now". I'm sorry perna but I'm not buying T's BS. If I purposely did something to offend T previously (i was simply talking about my feelings of anger and how I felt like I didn't matter to her. I wasn't personally attacking her) and in the process of the conversation she said the "i'm not angry with you right now' then I would say OK.

BUT

She clearly 'let it slip' and is having some issues (along with some controlling statements not asking me but telling me: I need you to be here at 10:30 not 10 - instead of saying "I think 10:30 would work better for both of us does that work for you?"). I'm going to ask for clarification on her statement about being angry 'not right now' and see where it gets me. The first time I worked up the courage to tell her something it was so hard but I did it anyways to get it out of the way and it backfired on me and she took it out on me. NOT something someone in trauma therapy should have to be dealing with. - the very basis of trauma or any therapy in my opinion is to feel safe. I've been beaten enough in my life to know or sense when someone is aggressive or domineering towards me.
I'm not going to play the roll over on my back like a dog and submit myself to her 'treatment' if she hasn't steered the ship in another direction. I shouldn't be afraid of my trauma therapist. I'm going to face this head on like I need to in the hopes that I can grow from this experience for what ever that means.

Hope my comment/statement doesn't come across rude or hurtful to you Perna. I do value your input I'm just a little 'hot under the collar' on this topic.

[Open Eyes]

Originally Posted by geez

Trying to work it out with T2 will only be for 'me'. I'm not holding back and I'm going to ask T about her 'not angry with you/at you right now' and see where that leads.

Keep you posted!

I can see how this is triggering to you geez. This is not "you" demanding or scolding her. This is you needing her to be there for you and she is not making you feel that she "is" there for you with her responses and body language.

It is interesting how this anger seems to me to be connected you to wanting to locate an abuser right now. This conflict with this T is bringing out some deep anger in you.

You know, I went through this myself, I would just burst with anger and my needs were not being met either. I was amazed at how much that triggered me and where it went that I had not consciously reconized before.

I hope you can work this out to getting past this issue with this T. I think that if you can get past that and let the original anger bubble up, the two of you could better work through the reason behind this trigger about the schedule and T2's reactions/body language.

You have been surpressing for many years and these emotions that bubble up need to come out and be worked through. I found that following triggers in myself was very important to my healing.

So, I hope you can work this out.

Open Eyes

[Wren_]

Geez, I thought there was another reason you weren't working with T1 now? that you'd gone back there and it didn't work, I may have confused it though You could always try asking about the EMDR and see what happens

AND that I'm interested in joining the support group she invited me to (marriage T) (about people contemplating bariatric surgery). She invited me to join the group as someone who was morbidly obese and lost weight through other means. She thinks it would be good for the group to see an example and to share my story about my weight loss journey.

Have you shared this on PC at all? if not ... could you please? or if you don't want to share publically could you pm me about it, I'd really like to hear

[rainbow8]

I think it's great that T1 is doing EMDR now! My gut feeling is that she is the best T for you, but you have to go by YOUR feelings, not mine. Did SHE say that she couldn't help you anymore, or did you decide that on your own? Regardless of which T you see, it doesn't sound like T2 is the right choice.

So, yes I think you should call her and ask about seeing her again? EMDR is for trauma, so it seems like T1 is on her way to becoming a trauma T. About EMDR, I'm not sure if it works for me or not, but it has brought up some useful thoughts and feelings for me. You haven't tried it yet? Was T2 planning to use it with you?

[geez]

(((((Open)))))) yes I am very much being triggered and I'm sure it's somehow all tied together!!!

Thank you for your insight!

Originally Posted by tigergirl

Geez, I thought there was another reason you weren't working with T1 now? that you'd gone back there and it didn't work, I may have confused it though You could always try asking about the EMDR and see what happens

Have you shared this on PC at all? if not ... could you please? or if you don't want to share publically could you pm me about it, I'd really like to hear

I stopped going to T1 because I felt like I didn't need her anymore. I really didn't feel like she had anything more to offer for me. Then a few months after ending therapy with T1 my husband and I went to marriage T. Marriage T said I clearly have unfinished business and recommended I go back to T1. I told marriage T no I don't want to go back to her (secretly to my self it's because it would be too painful to say goodbye to her again). Marriage T recommended I go to a T that specializes in trauma and EMDR (because I had such a negative reaction to EFT when I tried it for a couple sessions with marriage T). I then found T2 who does EMDR (on my own) and that's where I am now.

and I just found out that T1 has been certified in EMDR (marriage T told me this).

Also marriage T mentioned that she is starting a support group for people contemplating bariatric surgery and invited me to join for a few reasons - To help support others and give an example of someone who chose not to do the surgery route. I used to be obese (the majority of my life) and now I am not. I lost weight through proper diet and exercise. I'm training for my first marathon that takes place later this year.... and I'm interested in why people gain weight (psychological/behavioral). Currently studying health and exercise science but I am also interested in psychology.

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I think it's great that T1 is doing EMDR now! My gut feeling is that she is the best T for you, but you have to go by YOUR feelings, not mine. Did SHE say that she couldn't help you anymore, or did you decide that on your own? Regardless of which T you see, it doesn't sound like T2 is the right choice.

So, yes I think you should call her and ask about seeing her again? EMDR is for trauma, so it seems like T1 is on her way to becoming a trauma T. About EMDR, I'm not sure if it works for me or not, but it has brought up some useful thoughts and feelings for me. You haven't tried it yet? Was T2 planning to use it with you?

I am considering calling T1 because she now does do EMDR but I don't know that she would take me back? (probably all in my head)

If things don't go well with T2 and I do need to get a new T perhaps call T1?? (because T1 now does EMDR). what would happen if T1 said no?? - that would be such a major hurt for me and I feel like so much is going on right now.

My feelings are so confusing right now. My head is telling me one thing, my heart another and my gut is saying something else. AND I'm majorly triggered right now for many reasons. I feel like I'm going through a growth process and really understanding my attraction to people and what it means.... and I'm somehow mixing that in with my feelings about who should be my therapist. It's hard to know if I'm making the right decision. When I picked T2 I thought I was making a good choice and now I feel like she has too many issues and I feel extremely guarded around her right now. Time will tell... and I hope time goes by fast!

Thank you all for posting!!

[Wren_]

Thanks geez I knew you'd ended with T1 and why; and about the marriage therapy for some reason I thought you'd had a brief return to T1 inbetween ... I know you were considering it at one point and then I thought you had for a few weeks but I must have dreamt that do you think you'd be able to handle the attachment part again if you go back to do EMDR with her? that's wonderful with the weightloss

[geez]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

Thanks geez I knew you'd ended with T1 and why; and about the marriage therapy for some reason I thought you'd had a brief return to T1 inbetween ... I know you were considering it at one point and then I thought you had for a few weeks but I must have dreamt that do you think you'd be able to handle the attachment part again if you go back to do EMDR with her? that's wonderful with the weightloss

Tiger yes I did see her in between while I was looking for a new T. I was striking out finding a T so I saw her for a couple of sessions to deal with things (I also saw marriage T for a couple of individual sessions of EFT to help me along). So you didn't dream it

I don't know about the attachment part to T1. There is a part of me that still does feel really attached to her (she's like a second mom to me for lack of a better description). And I am ok with that however only if she can help me.

As a very, very, very last straw I can go to marriage T ( I feel attached to her) as I feel she can help me as well however I don't want to lose her as a marriage T and she won't do a dual roll.

[Perna]

Originally Posted by geez

My feelings are so confusing right now. My head is telling me one thing, my heart another and my gut is saying something else. AND I'm majorly triggered right now for many reasons.

I really get that reading your posts! Sounds very uncomfortable. I think if I were in your shoes, I might fall back and regroup; just see marriage T for awhile, since you seem to get along with her and have the least amount of difficulty working with her and then think through what trauma therapy you'd like and with whom, etc? I'd get one plate spinning before adding a second, then a third, etc.

http://www.artizans.com/images/previews/RKIN200.300.jpg

[Open Eyes]

geez, what I feel has been going on with you thus far is that T1 really helped fill a missing component from your past. In your relationship with her, you got permission to invest in yourself for the first time really. And this T1 was the healthy mentor that you just never had in your past. So what happened in you is that you finally got the chance to have a relationship with someone that not only invested in themselves in a healthy way but gave you permission to do the same.

The reason you felt you didn't need her anymore was what normally takes place in a child that is raised properly and also gets to a point where they feel ready to leave the nest and strike out on their own.

However, the one thing you didn't really work on is the past part of you that was injured and disrespected somehow. This new T's need to "put you off and make you wait" has sturred up old injuries that you are not really consciously aware of. But she really triggered you and this time you have had enough time to "be involved in gaining in investing in yourself in a healthier way", so you are not going to allow yourself to "not feel this disrespect".

This is what this new T is missing and misunderstanding about you. Her words and body language is showing that to you. And it is also triggering a very injured part of you that up until now, you never really addressed before. And you didn't even truely consiously know this about yourself either.

geez, I have experienced this myself and that is why I can see where you are right now. That is why I feel it is important that this new T understand this as well. This is "her job" to see this geez and she isn't seeing it. If she was seeing it she would not have said what she did or express it in her body language either.

geez, I went through this last year and everywhere I went "socially" I was misunderstood, even here at PC. Oh, I was so incredibly challenged last year and the people I needed to understand it failed me. Even my T failed me, but thankfully I hung in there and worked through it.

What finally came out is how this anger I was presenting was connected to the way I was abused and how it effected me in ways "I" didn't even recognize. It is crucial that a professional T be able to recognize this instead of "feeling threatened by it". This is the opposite of a crying hurt child geez, this is a very angry child that adults can very easily misread, even professionals, Unless they are trained in how to recognize it. Because it is a very important part of PTSD that can be very "misundestood".

Even if you take this post to show your T2 geez, it is so important for her to see. Last year it was so missed when I was experiencing it, I was crippled to a point of experiencing some very unhealthy thoughts. And I was not capable of understanding it myself. I was trying to explain it (like you are) but I just could not explain it to where other people were able to really understand "the anger that was coming out in me".

I truely feel that this is very important for the therapists to recognize and VALIDATE in you. This has to be handled for what it really means and you need to have that kind of "professional help" that can help guide you through this.

From the moment I began to develope PTSD this "anger element" in me was constantly misunderstood, even misdiagnosed. And I have the records to prove it geez. I said all the "red flags" but the anger I displayed was just taken so wrong.

This anger bubbling up is important geez and it genuinely needs to be validated and you need to have a therapist that not only recognizes this but can be there to help you work through it.

I have had to jump through hoops to have this recognized myself. And once it does get recognized it is such a release. We have to be able to express this deep anger geez and it has to be validated it is crucial to the healing process.

Open Eyes

[geez]

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

geez, what I feel has been going on with you thus far is that T1 really helped fill a missing component from your past. In your relationship with her, you got permission to invest in yourself for the first time really. And this T1 was the healthy mentor that you just never had in your past. So what happened in you is that you finally got the chance to have a relationship with someone that not only invested in themselves in a healthy way but gave you permission to do the same.

The reason you felt you didn't need her anymore was what normally takes place in a child that is raised properly and also gets to a point where they feel ready to leave the nest and strike out on their own.

However, the one thing you didn't really work on is the past part of you that was injured and disrespected somehow. This new T's need to "put you off and make you wait" has sturred up old injuries that you are not really consciously aware of. But she really triggered you and this time you have had enough time to "be involved in gaining in investing in yourself in a healthier way", so you are not going to allow yourself to "not feel this disrespect".

This is what this new T is missing and misunderstanding about you. Her words and body language is showing that to you. And it is also triggering a very injured part of you that up until now, you never really addressed before. And you didn't even truely consiously know this about yourself either.

geez, I have experienced this myself and that is why I can see where you are right now. That is why I feel it is important that this new T understand this as well. This is "her job" to see this geez and she isn't seeing it. If she was seeing it she would not have said what she did or express it in her body language either.

geez, I went through this last year and everywhere I went "socially" I was misunderstood, even here at PC. Oh, I was so incredibly challenged last year and the people I needed to understand it failed me. Even my T failed me, but thankfully I hung in there and worked through it.

What finally came out is how this anger I was presenting was connected to the way I was abused and how it effected me in ways "I" didn't even recognize. It is crucial that a professional T be able to recognize this instead of "feeling threatened by it". This is the opposite of a crying hurt child geez, this is a very angry child that adults can very easily misread, even professionals, Unless they are trained in how to recognize it. Because it is a very important part of PTSD that can be very "misundestood".

Even if you take this post to show your T2 geez, it is so important for her to see. Last year it was so missed when I was experiencing it, I was crippled to a point of experiencing some very unhealthy thoughts. And I was not capable of understanding it myself. I was trying to explain it (like you are) but I just could not explain it to where other people were able to really understand "the anger that was coming out in me".

I truely feel that this is very important for the therapists to recognize and VALIDATE in you. This has to be handled for what it really means and you need to have that kind of "professional help" that can help guide you through this.

From the moment I began to develope PTSD this "anger element" in me was constantly misunderstood, even misdiagnosed. And I have the records to prove it geez. I said all the "red flags" but the anger I displayed was just taken so wrong.

This anger bubbling up is important geez and it genuinely needs to be validated and you need to have a therapist that not only recognizes this but can be there to help you work through it.

I have had to jump through hoops to have this recognized myself. And once it does get recognized it is such a release. We have to be able to express this deep anger geez and it has to be validated it is crucial to the healing process.

Open Eyes

Thank you so much (((open))). You have helped me so much. It's like you reached right into my brain and put into words what I am feeling clearly and precisely in your post.

No matter what T I go to (marriage T, T1, or T2) they have to understand, acknowledge and help me learn from this so I can move on - with compasion. T2 I'm not so sure can do this. Marriage T I would say yes. T1 I would say maybe? - I never went through really much 'anger' when I was in therapy with her.

I may just ask each one of them that very question about anger to see what I get as a response (sort of like an interview question - how do you explore a clients anger in therapy ). - any suggestions on how to phrase that question??

At my appointment this Thursday I'm unsure if I want to talk about me finding my abuser. I don't know if she's worthy of knowing about that. It's going to be painful to talk about. I feel like the fist person I want to call is T1 when I do get his name (i'm close to finding it).

Open thank you for 'getting it'

[Open Eyes]

You know geez, that is a good question. Your thread actually was a turning point for me too geez. In my effort to try to understand "why" you were so upset about this T being "consistantly late" something struck me. I had to think back on my own anger last year. And for me, my T actually "forgot" he had made an appointment with me and put someone else in my time. He did that even after telling me that I could count on that time on Tuesdays to be our set time. I showed up and he told me "I" was the one that made the mistake. And I called him on that and he finally admitted that he was "burning the candle at both ends and it WAS his fault". But even though I worked that out with him, he did it again when I had planed a meeting with my husband. I was triggered again when that happened. But he sent away the other patient and saw me and my husband. But, I wondered if he would have still done that had my husband "not" been present that day. So in that session, some anger bubbled up because the whole session for me was just thrown off. The T looked at me surprised because he had never seen me angry and short tempered like that before. And I didn't have the words at the time to explain how what had happened had triggered me and that was why I got so short tempered. In that session, I was sitting in a room with two men that "let me down" and that meeting was supposed to address that? Wow, I am the patient, not the T, can you imagine how hard that situation was for me?

What had been going on outside that was that I had an attorney that was doing the very same thing to me by forgetting to inform me about a few scheduled depositions.
Even after I sat across from him and pleaded with him to please get on track with notifying me on time, he still forgot yet another deposition.

So while posting to your thread, I remembered my anger and why. And how it is so MISUNDERSTOOD even by my T who is also a PTSD treatment "specialist". Wow, was I challenged last year geez.

Actually geez, when I brought all this out for his attention again today, he had an aha moment as well. He realized what I was saying was "true" and he too failed to see it last year.

I know my T is going to rethink what he did last year that really "did" effect me. While he made it a point to "not" make scheduling mistakes again. He didn't really see the impact he added to my already troubling state of mind last year like I explained it to him today.

However, he did validate how this kind of "anger" is attached to my history of abuse and that "yes" I am definitely being unfairly "challenged" and even "disrespected" by my attorney.

But geez, I told him about your thread and how I could relate to it. I don't think he truely ever looked at "this particular" issue the way I showed it to him in respect to PTSD and what the disrespect means to a person like you and I who went through that type of magnified disrespect in the trama/tramas in our past.

If I had your T2, how I would handle it is the same way I talked to my T about this topic. I told him about the thread and what it meant and how I could understand where your anger was coming from and what that meant in relation to "missed scheduled or late appointments". It triggers something "very deep" in the PTSD patient, something that needs to be "noticed" and is going "un-recognized".

geez, it is the therapist's job to help the patient "feel safe" and that starts with "being on time and accurate scheduling". See, your T1 got that and so you never had that issue come up with her. It is an important detail when it comes to "treating PTSD patients that have any history of abuse/neglect.

Open Eyes

[geez]

Thank you so much again (((open))) for sharing this thread with your T. It may be one of the topics of conversation. I'm not sure how T2 will take it but it will tell a lot about her as a T (I think). I'm kind of nervous and afraid to say anything to her but I have nothing to lose. Wish me luck!

[Wren_]

If marriage T would be the best one to work through things with at this point; and she won't do dual roles ... is there any way that you could find another marriage T instead? or would that not work as far as your husband and the relationship the three of you have together in therapy? thanks also for explaining about T1

is anger something you've talked about before with t1 and marriage t?

[Open Eyes]

(((geez))),

Why don't you just copy this thread and bring it to her. Whatever you do, don't be afraid to talk about how this has effected you. We should NOT be afraid of our T's.
They need to know it when we don't feel "safe" with them.

geez, remember that T's (practice) and they learn from their patients. If a patient just decides to walk away from a T, the T should at least know WHY and how they may have contributed to that happening.

I think this T has her heart in the right place, as I mentioned. She is trying to give her patients time in therapy and sometimes that goes over. But she HAS to understand what that can mean to the patient that is in the waiting room as well.
My own T kept me waiting last week, but he did pop his head out to acknowlege me and tell me he was running late. So that made the waiting much easier.

You have been "triggered" twice now with her and that is important for you and her to address because it really goes deep with you. And I am "sure" that you are not the only one that has struggled with this problem. I have too and everything that presents a trigger is connected to more than just the seemingly small thing that "she" is just not seeing. This is exactly what I addressed last year and I could not really verbalize it well either last year. It did go very deep in me as well geez, something I needed to talk about and work on with my T too.

You have gained so much ground, you deserve to keep moving forward with the right support to keep moving forward. PTSD can lead to a patient being very misunderstood. It is so important T's see as much as they can so they can help ALL their patients.

((((Hugs)))))
Open Eyes

[Open Eyes]

Can you copy this thread including how I was able to validate you and email it to her?
This way maybe she can think about it and be more prepared in your next visit?
I know MY T is mulling my session over in "his" mind now. He didn't catch his very really error last year and what it all meant to me. I think that now he will consider this not only with me but with his other patients in the future.

I didn't know how you overcame so much and rose up to transforming yourself from the obese woman you once were. Your T1 must be such a good T to keep you encouraged to keep on that track of self improvement. That is something these other people who are considering surgery also need to hear. Often is not what we are eating, it is what is eating us and how we need to consider the whole picture when we make an effort to make changes in our lives.

I would hate to think some T that is supposed to be a "trama specialist" would take from what you have gained thus far. Clearly she is not seeing this for what it really is, which is so important for trama T's to recognize. You deserve to have what you need to keep going in your efforts geez.

Open Eyes

[geez]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

If marriage T would be the best one to work through things with at this point; and she won't do dual roles ... is there any way that you could find another marriage T instead? or would that not work as far as your husband and the relationship the three of you have together in therapy? thanks also for explaining about T1

is anger something you've talked about before with t1 and marriage t?

Unfortunately it took my husband three years of me asking him to get him to marriage therapy and he does like her. I don't know who else I would go to for marriage therapy or who else my husband would feel comfortable with.

But

I do think that I could ask him his thoughts. Marriage T did mention in front of him that she could be my T if I chose but she couldn't do both and he was fine with me having marriage T as my individual T. So that's an option too to consider. I may use marriage T for a consult or two if I need to figure this whole mess out further but for the next appointment with T2 I'm staying put.

On the subject of anger I actually expressed anger at T1 before and she was accepting of it and I felt heard.

On the subject of anger with marriage T I've never experienced anger in her presence so I don't know how she would handle it. I plan to ask her

[geez]

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

(((geez))),

Why don't you just copy this thread and bring it to her. Whatever you do, don't be afraid to talk about how this has effected you. We should NOT be afraid of our T's.
They need to know it when we don't feel "safe" with them.

geez, remember that T's (practice) and they learn from their patients. If a patient just decides to walk away from a T, the T should at least know WHY and how they may have contributed to that happening.

I think this T has her heart in the right place, as I mentioned. She is trying to give her patients time in therapy and sometimes that goes over. But she HAS to understand what that can mean to the patient that is in the waiting room as well.
My own T kept me waiting last week, but he did pop his head out to acknowlege me and tell me he was running late. So that made the waiting much easier.

You have been "triggered" twice now with her and that is important for you and her to address because it really goes deep with you. And I am "sure" that you are not the only one that has struggled with this problem. I have too and everything that presents a trigger is connected to more than just the seemingly small thing that "she" is just not seeing. This is exactly what I addressed last year and I could not really verbalize it well either last year. It did go very deep in me as well geez, something I needed to talk about and work on with my T too.

You have gained so much ground, you deserve to keep moving forward with the right support to keep moving forward. PTSD can lead to a patient being very misunderstood. It is so important T's see as much as they can so they can help ALL their patients.

((((Hugs)))))
Open Eyes

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

Can you copy this thread including how I was able to validate you and email it to her?
This way maybe she can think about it and be more prepared in your next visit?
I know MY T is mulling my session over in "his" mind now. He didn't catch his very really error last year and what it all meant to me. I think that now he will consider this not only with me but with his other patients in the future.

I didn't know how you overcame so much and rose up to transforming yourself from the obese woman you once were. Your T1 must be such a good T to keep you encouraged to keep on that track of self improvement. That is something these other people who are considering surgery also need to hear. Often is not what we are eating, it is what is eating us and how we need to consider the whole picture when we make an effort to make changes in our lives.

I would hate to think some T that is supposed to be a "trama specialist" would take from what you have gained thus far. Clearly she is not seeing this for what it really is, which is so important for trama T's to recognize. You deserve to have what you need to keep going in your efforts geez.

Open Eyes

My T2 doesn't do 'email' as she has said before to me but I have sent her things anyways telling her how I felt and in our 'exchange' she threw a lot of those feelings in my face - she told me how I wrote about me talking about 'her putting up with me' etc.. It was really hard to hear all of it.

I think I would incite her if I brought a copy of this thread. When I sent her an email (one of the times) she asked that I keep them brief in length

I really don't feel comfortable discussing this thread with her but i'm going to talk about her comment of "I'm not angry with you right now".

Thank you for understanding.

[Open Eyes]

((geez)), I respect your decisions and stand totally in support of your doing what is best for "you".

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes

[stopdog]

I hope your next encounter with her is less trying. She sounds quite defensive and that would be very hard to deal with.

[geez]

My appointment is tomorrow at 10:30am. Wish me luck! I'm feeling anxious about it.

(((geez)))) luck! you'll do great