Hey guys!

I have an extra session on Monday. Last session was really hard as it was the first since our misunderstanding - and I was a mess. I had a lot of anxiety, found it difficult to be there, just wanted to hide... I just felt so vulnerable after putting everything out there - attempts to explain my reactions, my feelings, maternal transference stuff... everything. I emailed her afterwards, worried that things were still up in the air - not to mention awkward - but she sent me a lovely reply that reassured me... at the end of which she put:

You might want to write down all that you need from me, our sessions, and then we can agree the way forward?


But hmm! What to write?

I had a couple thoughts, but how do I know what I need? I know what I might like.. there are things that might make therapy easier for me, for instance: I'd perhaps like her to be a bit more directive sometimes, but maybe that wouldn't be as effective, wouldn't be 'good therapy'...

To be honest I like our sessions much as they are... we've been doing fine so far (one 'socratic' question and my subsequent hissyfit aside ) but as much as I'd like to show up with a blank piece of paper and say 'don't change a thing', I feel like she might think I haven't taken the question seriously?

I just wondered what some of you guys might write/say if your T asked you that question?

[elliemay]

My advice? Don't censor yourself. Write everything down that you want and give it your therapist.

Is it good therapy or not? Who cares! This is your list. I suspect in the end it will definitely lead to good therapy and lots of discussion.

So far I just have stuff on her being more directive and asking more questions... wishing she'd 'take hints' when I try to bring things up ... and that I'd like a hug

I feel like this could be a great opportunity, in theory, asking for what I want... but I'm really happy with my T, and I really don't know what else I can ask for other than what she already gives me. (I mean, you know, that would be within the 'frame' or remotely possible...)

I would only write down I JUST NEED YOU IN THE SAME DAMN COUNTRY AS ME. Everything else is going great.