I was talking about how I struggle when another humanbeing is relating to me. So it's a huge problem. I tried explaining the feeling of awkwardness I feel. I said it feels like I'm all sharp edges. Like a triangle being forced into a circle. T said she thinks it's because of my abandoment at birth and my step mothers rejection of me I was made aware of myself much to young. A baby normally experiences being one with the mother. I never got that. My safe cover was never there. It's that raw feeling I feel in other peoples company.

[Miswimmy1]

I am in the same boat... I was abandoned at birth too, spent my 1st year in an orphanage, etc. I know the feeling and I'm also working on it with my t... Wanted u to know that u aren't alone

[Dreamy01]

I understand

[unaluna]

how does your T KNOW all this stuff? she is so right on with everything. where did she study or with who? is this mentalization? I l0ve her. I need her.

She study at the institute of pyschoanalysis & social studies in London. A bit to far for you to travel I think Hankster :-)

Hankster we could make one trip, across the pond Earthmamma is T taking skype clients?

LoL xx
.

[WikidPissah]

I am up for a sail across the pond...pig pile on earthmama, sounds like fun.

I don't think I was ever one with my mom either. She found out she was pregnant again when I was a month old, and went into a depression. They say she left me in the crib all day

[unaluna]

a couple of years ago, I found a book by one of the founders of the ipss thru my usual google shenanigans. I can't get on their website now, but they had these great discussion forums scheduled. T still has the book, I think the guy's name started with a Z. I remember now, it was about using dolls in therapy.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by WikidPissah

They say she left me in the crib all day

no way. my mother says the old lady next door criticized her for leaving me alone in the crib too long. this is a story she has told my entire life, like it was a big joke, so I always took it that way, but as always, the devil is in the details, and she really doesn't have any to back up HER side of the story.

I wish there was a place where all the ground was covered in soft clouds and all the concrete was like a sleep number bed. Then we wouldn't have to hurt when we fall on the rocks or bleed when we are pushed down a cliff. We could try to pad our bodies, but then we wouldn't be able to move, and everyone would probably laugh at us and throw rocks at us to make sure we were human and not some monster walking around so strangely. Alas, it seems the only possible way to survive the danger of the world around us is to remember that we have a right to live, and to be free, and to succeed at everything we try to do. It is our right. No one can kill it, steal it, or destroy it. It's ours to keep forever! This helps me whenever I am afraid of other people and places. Hopefully it helps you too my friend! Sincerely, Glinda Gail

Lightbulb. No I'm more a realist. I'm just glad to be in therapy where my issues can be named & tamed

I hope you don't mind me asking a question...but here goes, what is a realist? what are the characteristics of that? am I one? AHHHH! I had no idea!!! I've been introducing myself to others as just a plain 'ol person. So far. But if the shoe fits, I'll have to strap it on.

I was trying to say, using phantasys such as the world having a soft cloud etc doesn't work for me. I exPereince the world as it really is, good and bad, and everything I between. I know that sort of thinking works for some, but not for me. I'm not sure what You mean "if the shoe fits" comment is about. I clearly said I am a realist.

As you have explained what a realist is in your own language, it sounds to me that we are all realists. Each member of humanity does bleed. Each one does cry. Each one is in need of mercy and understanding. Perhaps if one had used the power of understanding to it's fullest extent by say...I don't know.....reading a complete thought instead of the first line and then judging it in the presence of others.......they could actually be a more effective supporter of others, and receive support themselves. But what do I know? Lol thanks for your contribution to the solution of your very own problem. The answer lay in your own words all along =)