[lostmyway21]

I got upset at the end of session today before it was time to leave. T asked me to tell him what was wrong and I was quiet on the verge of crying. Then he was like you do this before the end of session a lot, is it because you don't want to leave? Then I think he asked me to tell him again what was wrong. But I spazed out and said no and and RAN out of there as he was talking, and didn't say anything to him.

I've never done anything like that before. No, I never want to leave session. But I was upset because of something I had been thinking about in session. I just didn't have the time to get it out and I freaked last minute. I feel like he was accusing me of doing something wrong. I couldn't run out if there fast enough.

The end of session DOES trigger the most emotional reactions out of me. BUT now I feel like he just thinks I was trying to steal more time. I don't know what to think of what happened.

I know I actively got upset because we were talking about my progress and lack of progress in certain areas of therapy. Even though he reassured me it was okay as long as I kept making progress in some areas. But now I don't know...was I subconsciously trying to stay longer? Was he actually right? What does it even mean if I was?

I'm feeling like such a horrible person right now.

its called a door knob move...everyone has done it.

Its when you wait til the last minute and bring up something earth shattering. I have done it and yes it was because I wasn't ready to leave. Its ok, your T knows what it is and why you did it. Like I said , I've read about others doing it. Heck my T did it to me once... and I called him out on it. LOL Your not horrible, its ok. Promise.

[lostmyway21]

Apparently it's a habit for me.

well know that you are aware of that you can change it.

[unaluna]

my T said it means "transitions" are hard for me. I was like wtf does that mean? he said, like when you were a kid, going to bed, leaving to go to school, transitioning from one activity to another. I was like, are you out of your mind? It was, get to bed RIGHT NOW. Get up RIGHT NOW. Leave for school RIGHT NOW. There was no one "welcoming" me home from school. WHAT transitions?? And then it was - oh, I get it... So now T gives me the transitions I never had, and never knew I was missing, with our own little caring hello and goodbye rituals. It's not a matter of stealing extra time, it's using your allotted time wisely. It's analysing why those last moments are always awful, and making them happy ones, and trying to hold on to that.

[~EnlightenMe~]

The old door knob confession.

[wotchermuggle]

It's also called a Last Minute Bomb. Bah, I've done it too. It's not always about wanting to stay longer though. Sometimes it's easier to drop something knowing you don't have time to fully discuss it.

[lostmyway21]

It's about me not wanting to leave. Not sure why...I'm not trying to drop any last minute stuff on him.

Could it just be a simple as, you like your T, you feel safe with him, so of course you don't want to leave after just an hour? I feel the same way many times. It doesn't mean we're horrible, it just means the confines of the limited session are hard to accept sometimes when we want to stay with our Ts.

[lostmyway21]

Originally Posted by amaj910

Could it just be a simple as, you like your T, you feel safe with him, so of course you don't want to leave after just an hour? I feel the same way many times. It doesn't mean we're horrible, it just means the confines of the limited session are hard to accept sometimes when we want to stay with our Ts.

Well yeah it's the only place I feel grounded. I feel safe with him. How do I fix it though? How do I make it easier to transition?

Do you get upset at the end of session because you know you have to leave?

Oops I see you already basically answered this. Maybe you could discuss this with him about how it is hard for you to leave so you could have a few transition moments? I don't know. It is hard to leave that safe place for me too.

[lostmyway21]

Yes sometimes. I mostly shutdown though because I don't know what else to do.

I'd definitely bring this up, maybe early in the session so you have plenty of time to discuss it. I'm sure your therapist can help you think of ways to deal so you don't have to shut down or get upset.

[critterlady]

My T tends to pull those on me. He often ends the session by saying "I need to stop us now, but I want you to think about x." Then he goes on to suggest something that he knows will make me ask him questions.

[lostmyway21]

Originally Posted by critterlady

My T tends to pull those on me. He often ends the session by saying "I need to stop us now, but I want you to think about x." Then he goes on to suggest something that he knows will make me ask him questions.

T had already wrapped up the session like he normally does. Summarizes the goals, what we talked about, asks if I had any questions. I remember him talking in the background, but I was so caught up in my head nothing he was saying mattered. The second he stopped talking and told me he'd see me Monday, I looked down at my pants teared up and shutdown.

I guess he did all he could have.

[unaluna]

wasn't it you who also uses the carol doll from where the wild things are? aka uncle moishe? yeah, uncle moishe always goes in for a handshake or stg with T as he helps me up from my chair. you never know what that crazy puppet is gonna do next.