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Sila
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Default Nov 28, 2012 at 06:17 PM
  #1
I leave in a bit to drive the 30 mins to go see my T. I haven't seen her for the past 2 weeks, so my routine that I finally settled into has been broken and I'm back to being super nervous before our appts again. I haven't felt this much anxiety about T since I first started going a month ago and i hate feeling like i "regressed" or took 2 steps backwards after finally taking a step forward.

I have some important things to bring up to her, a few questions, and I'm going to try and let her lead as much as I can so we can get things 'moving'. I'm so nervous though. ;.;

Anyone wanna pocket ride for me tonight, if you're not tired of it yet? :S I think I might bring my stuffed animal tonight too for some extra help in calming down..

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lifelesstraveled
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Default Nov 28, 2012 at 07:09 PM
  #2
Due to scheduling T and I had a bit of a break...I think it was almost 6 weeks! I was sooooo nervous going in. And when I got there I kept looking around to see if something had changed. We made small talk at first and then my nerves calmed down. Hopefully it will be the same for you!

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Default Nov 28, 2012 at 09:19 PM
  #3
sorry, just now seeing this. I would have come; hope it went well for you.
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Default Nov 28, 2012 at 09:23 PM
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Thanks for the hugs guys. I'm back and it went over pretty good. She didn't mind me bringing my stuffed animal- she thought it was pretty neat how it had little lavender pockets sewn in. I tried to remember to rub the plushie's ears instead of tearing my fingers apart. It helped a little.

We touched base on a lot of things. Covered my anxiety leading up to the trip to my bf's parent's, how I've been trying to face my fears but how I kinda went to the extremes and overwhelmed myself (ie: black friday shopping when I have social anxiety & hypersensitive senses). We talked about bullying incidents, specific phrases that really sunk in deep and how she hopes she can help me learn to stick up for myself instead of letting myself get walked on..I didn't even think that was possible.

She gave me a good idea when it comes to being 'grounded' while reading a specific book that's triggering me. She suggested for me to write things down as they come to mind, even if i don't show them to anyone. Just getting it out on paper can reduce the emotional impact it has while it's floating around in my head over and over.

A lot of things we talked about...Just kind of floating from topic to topic still..I don't really know how to make progress or start anything, there's so much going on.

Funny...she said she could try to help be a "translator" between me and my mom when it comes to explaining the anxiety situations n such, since my mom doesnt understand. She found it kinda interesting that I took on the personality traits of my dad even though he left when I was 3-4. The whole nature vs nurture thing. I don't really share any personality traits with my mom despite the fact she raised me alone for all these years.

Also funny thing...it's official now, i cannot have a session without breaking the clip to my pencil each time. It's totally accidental but it happens each and every time and it's become a running joke between us now. XD

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Default Nov 29, 2012 at 10:35 AM
  #5
I'm glad that it went well.
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Default Nov 29, 2012 at 10:41 AM
  #6
That's good that it went well! Sry, I would have come with u if I had seen it...

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