[MissCharlotte]

I know me better.
I believe more often that T "gets" my core wounded self.
(Just figured this out last week and it lasted a whole damned week.)
He says I want to be seen.
I think I want to hide.
I want to run away from H.
I don't want to be alone.
I'm hopelessly caught in a spider web that I wove myself.

[ECHOES]

It is so good to see you here!

[MissCharlotte]

Originally Posted by ECHOES

It is so good to see you here!

[~EnlightenMe~]

Originally Posted by MissCharlotte

I know me better.
I believe more often that T "gets" my core wounded self.
(Just figured this out last week and it lasted a whole damned week.)
He says I want to be seen.
I think I want to hide.
I want to run away from H.
I don't want to be alone.
I'm hopelessly caught in a spider web that I wove myself.

MissC,
I am so sorry that you are going through such a difficult time.

You have not woven a spider's web, you are weaving the web of life. Shame is often a feeling that makes one feel like they want to hide. Maybe you want to hide because of your shame is keeping you there, but maybe the part of you shrouded in shame wants to be seen. I'm so glad you are posting, I have missed you dearly.

You are not alone. Didn't we plan on going in the same mental institution when we get older and sitting on the porch in our rocking chairs? lol That was so long ago. I'm still crazy. You're in my thoughts

Painful place to be. But the spider builds a web to lure flys. Your not trapped. Your thinking like a fly.

[skeksi]

I like the idea of a web you wove yourself--because you wove a web that got you what you needed, a T who understood the core you and could help you try to work out what else you do want and need.

I understand the feeling of being stuck. It's scary. For me, the antidote is to find ways that I am in control. You are finding ways to take control, slowly. It's a process. {{{Miss C}}}