Weird session...help?

Then I went into critical awareness. I realized about halfway through that when I answered the questions on paper, I was intellectualizing. So she had me put the paper away and answer the questions in the here and now. I made the point that in the first world, vulnerability of any kind is looked upon as "weakness", that society judges people who have needs. Or, if we have needs, we can't show them. T started to smile. If we do show them, then we open ourselves up to judgement, embarrassment, and shame, especially for a need perceived by many to be a need we should not have as adults...something that should have been met in childhood. Society tends to sexualize touch between adults. People can use the "I don't have any needs" attitude to hide their own shame related to touch and anything else.

Yes, there is an element of intellectualising.

Hi MissCharlotte! Just because she was a bit "hyper" and did things out of character during the session. Then it was as if she shut down at the end, which she never does.

One part that I did not remember until now was that when she asked me to talk about the shame bit, I put on my best "cute" face and and looked at her. She looked at me and said, "I'm immune to cute." I said, "So a lot of your clients sit here and act cute?" She said, "Not necessarily; I'm immune to cute because I've raised 3 kids."

Therapists, doctors, coworkers, baristas - whoever has any authority over me.

Chopin, you desire so much to be the favorite, and when it proves out that you are favored you back up and question it. It's like "You love me, you really love me" and then..."wait no, maybe you're faking it"..."no one can possibly love me". Insecurity grasping for the negative (like I do as well). There was comfort, playfulness, touch and love...don't over think it.