(As Read by my Therapist from Daring Greatly, by Brené Brown)

"As I conducted my interviews I realized that only one thing separated the men and women who felt a deep sense of love and belonging from the people who seemed to be struggling for it. That one thing was the belief in their worthiness.
It's as simple and complicated as this if we want to fully experience love and belonging we must believe that we are worthy of love and belonging."

Me: I agree

Therapist: Yea, And that's where your getting. That's what's changed.

Me: Mmhmm

Therapist: I didn't know anybody actually had researched, solidly supported that, until I saw that. (I don't know anything about author's research.)

*** My therapist swears by Brené Brown

A rather simplistic view on a complex issue.

[autotelica]

I struggle to feel love and connectedness because I am insensitive to my feelings and those from others. It has nothing to do with my self-esteem, although the lack of empathy and feeling has certainly depressed my self-esteem.

I seem to always be the exception to this particular author's "rules".

[stopdog]

I am glad to hear it is working for you.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by earthmamma

A rather simplistic view on a complex issue.

Sometimes it is necessary to oversimplify if we are to see the big picture.
Eg in high school physics we always ignore air resistance.

PS:

Having said that, "self worth" has many facets. I have always had a very powerful sense of (and confidence in) my own intellectual abilities. My social sense of worth is much weaker.

[learning1]

Originally Posted by autotelica

I struggle to feel love and connectedness because I am insensitive to my feelings and those from others. It has nothing to do with my self-esteem, although the lack of empathy and feeling has certainly depressed my self-esteem.

I seem to always be the exception to this particular author's "rules".

I admire your ability to understand and explain how you experience this.

I suppose what you describe is the case to some extent for a lot of people. I'm not exactly sure what "insensitive to feelings" is like, but maybe part of it is just logically figuring out what the feelings are (in the way that average people define and understand feelings) and maybe part of it is knowing what to say or do to respond to the feelings. I have trouble with the second part.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by autotelica

It has nothing to do with my self-esteem, although the lack of empathy and feeling has certainly depressed my self-esteem.

Low empathy is not respected in our society.

[autotelica]

Originally Posted by CantExplain

Low empathy is not respected in our society.

I hate that people think it's a choice.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by autotelica

I hate that people think it's a choice.

Quite so.

[adel34]

I'm so glad your therapy is working for you, GTGT!