[lu2415]

Hello,

I'm making a LONG story very short, so I apologize in advance if it doesn't make sense!

I've been working with a therapist for 3 years now. My therapist went on a 4 month break at the end of the year, saying she would be back early January. Well we're 3 weeks in and she just told me it will now be mid-February because she decided to move her office and the new one won't be available until some time then (if it's even available, she's awaiting phone calls).. I'm a bit frustrated to say the least.. She's called twice to "update" me on the status, and I was originally told she would be back today.. And I don't quite understand how she had 4 months off and didn't deal with the office situation during that time.

I'm having a difficult time deciding if I want to keep working with her. She has been very helpful, but I don't feel that things are always 100% professional - nothing major but things like changing appt times the day before/day of, randomly canceling the day/few days before (more than once), arriving late to appointments. Things I could normally deal with, but when added to this kind of back and forth with her returning has me questioning if I might be better off with someone else. I also just get the impression that she isn't eager in any way to get back into seeing clients which has me a bit concerned.

To be perfectly honest - it makes me a bit mad. But she's been really helpful so I hate to just give up on it if it's just. Any input on this dilemma?

[feralkittymom]

Consistency often carries important meaning in therapy, relating to issues of trust. I guess the question is to what degree does her inconsistency undermine your trust either in her as a T, in the relationship, or in your ability to progress?

If it's nothing more than a minor annoyance, maybe you can work through it. If it feels like a bigger issue, do you think you can work through it?

Did she explain her 4 month break? Did she prepare you for it? Offer any interim arrangements?

[ECHOES]

It would make me a bit mad too.

You could see someone else in the meantime, and then decide when your T returns to work if you want to continue with her or the new T.

[CantExplain]

Consistency is important. But I also comforted by my T's mistakes.

It's scary to think she might be perfect.

[pbutton]

I think I would start looking for a new T. It's hard to change, but if the new one is good it is totally worth it.

[stopdog]

If I were bothered by the things stated, I would find a new one.

I think a four month break, which then is getting extended, would be too much for me. But, then, I am still kind of nervous about falling back into a depression and want stability.

[TheWell]

Mt T has never cancelled (it's been over 3 years) He is always within 5 minutes of start time. When he's going on vacation he is clear with me and we set up the appointments before and after so there is consistency. Sounds like maybe a more professional T might be nice.

[Wren_]

From what you've said you've survived the break and your T should be starting up again very soon. Why not go to the session and share your concerns and frustration and since you've said they were helpful previously see if you can work through the problems. Let her know you are feeling mad. Did you ever discuss the other concerns before?