[kittycat97]

I have been in a dilemma whether or not to quit... I used to look forward going to the clinic but i dread going there now... It feels like i can't bring myself to share with my therapist after the bad experiencing of him being sarcastic and sighing .
My doc sighs every time too... Should i just change therapist and see how it goes or quit going to clinic although. I have already booked my first appointment at another clinic though. Am i sort of betraying the ppl at the current clinic?

[Asiablue]

No, you are not betraying the clinic. You have to do what is right for you. You are of paramount importance. You deserve to feel like you are safe to be vulnerable in therapy and not be mocked. Until you feel that safety you won't be able to progress any further. I hope the new clinic works out for you x

[stopdog]

I believe a client has the right to see any provider who they feel may help them without worry about any previous provider. I do not think you are betraying anyone.

[kittycat97]

So should i confront them or just request to change?

[feralkittymom]

There's certainly no betrayal involved. Do you need the clinic's approval to change?

I don't know about the sarcasm, which would always be inappropriate, but sighing can certainly express various feelings. Are you sure you're not jumping to conclusions about your T's responses to you?

Generally, I think a lot can be gained from at least checking out your assumptions and seeing how your T responds and how you feel about it before deciding to leave.

[stopdog]

Originally Posted by kittycat97

So should i confront them or just request to change?

Do you think you would benefit from seeing them again, is the question as I see it. I personally would not go back, but many others would feel the need to go back one more time. But I believe the focus should be on doing what you think would be most beneficial to you.

[kittycat97]

I am in a dilemma... Sigh

[Sannah]

A lot can be learned by trying to work through something. There is always something to learn.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by kittycat97

I have been in a dilemma whether or not to quit... I used to look forward going to the clinic but i dread going there now... It feels like i can't bring myself to share with my therapist after the bad experiencing of him being sarcastic and sighing .
My doc sighs every time too... Should i just change therapist and see how it goes or quit going to clinic although. I have already booked my first appointment at another clinic though. Am i sort of betraying the ppl at the current clinic?

my therapist and I deal with these issues by scheduling my appointments according to whats going on at the moment... if Im not having problems/issues to work on we set it as I will call her for the next appointment.. if Im having problems/issues that need to be worked on we schedule weekly/biweekly/monthly appointments.

only you can decide whether to change therapists or not, whether to quit the clinic or not. and only you can decide whether you are betraying the people at your current clinic... here where I live and work the term betraying doesnt fit whether a person seeks out treatment elsewhere.. here in america every american has the right to choose who they see for treatment and can at any point seek out other treatment options therefore its not considered stabbing a treatment provider in the back / being disloyal kind of thing which is what betraying someone means here. treatment providers in america understand americans have this right to choose their own treatment providers...that said...here in NY treatment providers prefer hearing from their clients when they have decided to go for a second opinion/make a change so that they can close out their file with that client. this allows them to open the door to another client that may need / want their help but cant get that health care as long as the client that is going elsewhere is taking up the caseload space because they havent closed the file with the first treatment provider. here most treatment providers have so many clients that they are able to help and when one moves on theres a list of others that waiting for health care on a waiting list.

to me its only common curtesy for someone to let another person know when they cant meet with them. whether its just a friend you had -plans with and have changed your mind or a treatment provider that you have in essence decided to dump, get rid of, change from... I wouldnt want a friend, or family member tr suddenly change their plans with out notifying me that they dont want to be my friend/ family or do things with me.. and I certainly wouldnt want my therapist, psychiatrist and medical doctors to suddenly drop me with out notifying me that Im not on their case load anymore..so I dont dd that kind of thing to them..

my suggestion... call the clinic and let them know you are meeting with someone else. that way the next person on their waiting list can get the help they may need. doing this will also help in keeping communication open should this new treatment provider not work out.

[wotchermuggle]

Originally Posted by kittycat97

I have been in a dilemma whether or not to quit... I used to look forward going to the clinic but i dread going there now... It feels like i can't bring myself to share with my therapist after the bad experiencing of him being sarcastic and sighing .
My doc sighs every time too... Should i just change therapist and see how it goes or quit going to clinic although. I have already booked my first appointment at another clinic though. Am i sort of betraying the ppl at the current clinic?

Oh my gosh, I am so sensitive to sighing as well. You have to do what is right for you. If you don't feel supported, you shouldn't feel guilty about doing what's in your best interests. You're hiring these people to help you and if they aren't, no worries. You don't owe them anything.

[kittycat97]

How do i bring the subject up on quitting?

[anilam]

No, I would not go that far to say finding a new T/ clinic is a betrayal. However, I think it is important for a client to be able to go back an openly say to their T that they want to quit. T should be able to help you to quit him (i.e. he shouldn't take it personally, be disappointed/sad/hurt...) After all it is still a part of therapeutic process.
If I were you I would brought up the subject why you're quitting. Ppl sigh for many reasons but being sarcastic? Really? How's that helpful?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by kittycat97

How do i bring the subject up on quitting?

when ever I quit seeing a therapist in the past I went in and say to them, I came in to tell you I wont be coming back because... then I list my reasons and what my future mental health plans are.

when I am seeing someone else as a second opinion or checking out a new person I tell the present therapist I found a therapist I am going to check out.. I will let you know after my first session with the new therapist if I will be continuing with you or changing to this new therapist.

[stopdog]

If you have decided to go back and tell them, I would think a simple "I have been thinking and have decided to try something else at this time" would do it.

[lifelesstraveled]

Originally Posted by kittycat97

I have been in a dilemma whether or not to quit... I used to look forward going to the clinic but i dread going there now... It feels like i can't bring myself to share with my therapist after the bad experiencing of him being sarcastic and sighing .
My doc sighs every time too... Should i just change therapist and see how it goes or quit going to clinic although. I have already booked my first appointment at another clinic though. Am i sort of betraying the ppl at the current clinic?

Can you bring up the subject by writing it down/journaling and then bring that writing with you? I am a huge fan of doing that because it's always hard for me to bring some difficult up verbally. Writing it down and letting T read it or even if you take what you wrote and use it to guide you as you tell T yourself.

Maybe T doesn't realize he's sighing, or that the sarcasm hurt you. Have you discussed that with him before? Maybe he is mimicking something he saw you do. Maybe he's trying to show concern by sighing---especially after telling him something hard. sometimes sighing can be empathetic like he hears and understands what you are saying.

I've noticed that when I'm present and actively talking in a session T will be very active and there too. BUT when I'm not completely there, almost out of it and disconnected from the discussion, I've noticed that T yawns more or looks tired like she's not completely there either. That usually only happens when we start focusing on me and not work issues or boyfriend issues and such. So maybe your T is some how reflecting back to you what you are doing--if that makes sense. I'm not a therapy expert (though I should been in T for 5 years now).

I don't look at is as betrayal if you decide to move on. I think you need to do what's right for you.

[Perna]

For me, I'd have to take some time and pen and paper and write it all out. Why I'm changing, what I hope to achieve by changing, why the other place/therapist does not work for me and how/why I think things will be different in the new place, what to do about the old therapist and/or if I have seen the new therapist long enough to know I prefer that, etc. Otherwise, I get all sorts of things swirling around in my head and I can't keep them straight and feel like I'm working with one of those mix and match children's books:

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/i...5H6Q_ybzyiPCBv