Therapist Vacation

When: Leaves in May

Length of Vacation: 4 weeks

Antimatter
How are you feeling about this? It's a LONG vacation

Oh noes! You poor thing! My T has a habit of taking long vacations, too, and so I know it's gonna be tough, but I am here to tell you that the time WILL pass and you WILL survive!

(And I am sure that, unlike me, you will be able to leave things in a positive place, and not pick a fight before T leaves and then worry about it for the whole month they are gone... not a good strategy!)

Yah, thats tough.hope it goes by fast.

It feels horrible. I just finished telling him how depressed I am, how I stay in bed most of the day when I can, and then he pops this on me. I HATE it. I absolutely despise it. The good thing is that it doesn't matter how I feel, I am of no consequence. Obviously, I don't expect him to stay home from this great vacation on which he is embarking.

Having that said, I hate it. I want to just leave now permanently, at least it will be on my terms. At least the pain will be me doing it to myself. The evil me has arisen.

Last time my T went away I was a mess. Total mess. We we in the middle of an ongoing rupture, which made the whole thing worse.. long story.. but I ended up going to see her supervisor while she was away, which helped some because I could work through some of my issues and feelings with him. I didn't miss her less, but I felt at least I had someone there helping me stay afloat in her absense... would something like that be an option?

As for making it 'the end' so it would be your choice... no. Nope! Don't do it. If one thing that break taught me it was that I didn't want my life not to have my T in it. It made me all the more determined to sort things out with her when she got back.

The vacation before that wasn't as long, and I was in something of a better place, but something I found helped me through that time was doing things I felt would make her proud of me that I could tell her when she got back. I even spent time making her a piece of art to give to her on her return, and that helped me feel connected to her.

I'm just 2 days into an almost 3 week long break due to T's vacation. And I'm angry about it - very angry - which makes no sense, but I don't care. That's how I feel.

I felt like I had to take some action or I would just burst, so I scored two appts with a T I had seen for one session last year. One appt this week and one next week. And BTW, he's a very attractive older man with a quiet soothing voice. I'm very comfortable with him.

Take that, T! You can be replaced!!

Of course, I'm sticking with current T but now I have something to look forward to while he's gone instead of just moping around and counting the days. It's a coping mechanism - expensive, but it works for me.

I hope you find something to help you get through this. I know the feelings are just miserable.

I will reply more when I get a chance to get on my computer, I hate replying from my phone. I took my sleeping pills already because I am ready to go to sleep and escape. Thanks everyone!

Yeah, I never responded well to T's vacation either. xT didn't take long vacations, so we never missed more than two sessions, but it always stressed me out. I tried to show that it didn't matter, tho.

Antimatter, I can totally relate.. I know how hard it can be. My T takes two breaks of 2 weeks each on Christmas and Easter and a summer break of 2 months! Plus, he has no cell phone, no nothing! As painful as it may be and as much as I dissociate after a long break like this, I find it useful to see how I cope by myself and how I make use of everything I gained in my relationship with him. Of course, there are times when I feel I can't make it; I usually write to him during this time in my journal. Just a way to feel a little bit more close to him.
You'll make it; you can post here as much as you want for support! Hugs!

Gosh, I'm so sorry. My thoughts are with you. My T was away for two weeks once when I was in a crisis situation. It was hard, but she referred me to someone else in her counseling group that she thought would be a good match. She was great, but it wasn't the same as seeing my own T as we didn't have the same bond. I only saw her 4 times.

Still, I do know that I can survive without her.... Four weeks is a loooong time, though. I'm really sorry. Would you see another T that your T could refer you to while your T is away?

Ugh. That IS a long break. I hope you can work towards figuring out what you need to be able to endure the break so things can be in place for you. (( HUGS ))

I appreciate everyone's support, thanks so much! I asked about another T, and he seemed okay with that. I don't know if I even want that. I'm just now recovering from the news. The hardest part is that it is going to be when I am at work, and I know it could be good because I will be busy, but I have a difficult time with people at work sometimes, and the workplace can seem terrifying, oddly enough. I don't even care about him leaving now, I feel nothing.

That's very hard. Mine would do 4-6 weeks often.

I think up projects to do; like I'm on sabbatical :-) What is a Sabbatical? | Meet Plan Go

Some things that have helped me get by while my t has been gone have been taking up a couple new hobbies, learning some new kinds of exercise, joining a gym, reading tons and tons of books, making some new friends, and doing art. And some days i just veg out on the couch cuz i dont feel like i am up to doing anything. Some days i miss her terribly. Some days i am ok with her being gone. Some days i am mad at her ( like if she tells me she had a good time at a special event, or is enjoying the weather where she is)-- and im like "youre supposed to be gone for a family emergency! Youre not supposed to be having fun!" My point its it is ok to have all the feelings you have when your t is gone. Its ok. You will make it thru this. Do whatever you can to make the time go by faster. Sometimes even just taking lots of naps is a good choice to survival

Thanks everyone for the replies. I had another session with T, and I feel much better than I did. I told him that I felt bad about not being happy for him as far as his vacation goes, and he basically told me that, WE know that this is a subject that you struggle with, I wanted to tell you so WE can work on this. He said, I want you to be totally honest with me about how you feel in relation to my vacation. I know that I will have issues when he leaves, as that is how it usually goes with me. However, I am confident in myself, I know we will have a plan if I get too overwhelmed, but I know that I can do this no matter what emotion emerges. I will be here often, I highly suspect, so I am giving you all six weeks warning Psychcentral People have helped me through so much, I wanted to say that I am very appreciative of you all.