[retro_chic]

For some reason I am convinced my T doesn't like me despite having no evidence at all. I am sure she must dread having to see me and put up with my whinging for an hour - I know I would if I was her. I sent her an email on Friday and she hasn't replied yet and I keep thinking it is because she doesn't like me even though I know that is stupid and she is probably just busy. Despite knowing that I just feel as if she doesn't care about me.

[Freewilled]

I feel that way all.the.time I want to believe my T when he says he doesn't find me difficult, isn't frustrated or annoyed with me etc. But I always go back there. It is so frustrating! I feel for you and I don't fully understand it either.

[ChicagoFire]

Yes, I feel that way. I've asked her if she just want to scream "Shut up!" I would hate that job.

[a bland]

i know what yall mean! i wonder does my T really care like she says she does or is it just her job. and then she says, "i dont know how to help u." what the hell does that mean? am i a lost cause? or does she just not care enough to want to try and help me?

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by retro_chic

For some reason I am convinced my T doesn't like me despite having no evidence at all. I am sure she must dread having to see me and put up with my whinging for an hour - I know I would if I was her. I sent her an email on Friday and she hasn't replied yet and I keep thinking it is because she doesn't like me even though I know that is stupid and she is probably just busy. Despite knowing that I just feel as if she doesn't care about me.

I sometimes felt Madame T was mean, but I don't recall thinking she didn't like me. I thought she was mean as a matter of policy.

[retro_chic]

Originally Posted by CantExplain

I sometimes felt Madame T was mean, but I don't recall thinking she didn't like me. I thought she was mean as a matter of policy.

Interesting... I don't think my T is mean but I still think she hates me. I keep having the thought that I shoul SI as a way of seeing if she cares. I am trying really hard not to act on it though because I know how manipulative that is

[CantExplain]

Please don't.

[elliemay]

yep. still feel that way sometimes. It's hard to talk about it, and they won't listen to reason when we say they don't like us.

[tinyrabbit]

I'm learning that this is information about how you feel about yourself, due to experiences you've had. My parents didn't care about me so I assume my T doesn't either.

Please don't SI to get a reaction from your T.

I have been talking to mine about this lately and he says that, whatever he says or does, it's going to keep happening - I will think he doesn't care - until we work through the root causes of these beliefs. What helps is to talk about it and challenge what you are assuming. Why do you think that? What basis do you have for thinking it?

[ThisWayOut]

I feel that way too a lot... and I challenge him sometimes, and we talk about it and he says he doesn't dislike me or find me a bother... but my inner voice says otherwise. it will take a whole ton of convincing and work on my self-esteem to change my mind just now... but when I'm in a better space, I don't feel the same way...

[retro_chic]

Yeah, as I said, I am trying very hard not to act on those thoughts. More than anything I want T to like me and I will not achieve that by being manipulative.

I feel angry at T but at the same time attached to her. Stupid transference.

[tinyrabbit]

I told my T I'm afraid he'll say: "I hate you, you can't come for therapy any more."

He said: "I promise I will never do that. If I hate you, I will explore with you why I hate you."

Which is good, as he's saying he'll stick with me. But bad because I don't understand why he doesn't hate me...