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Old May 08, 2013, 09:19 PM
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Sometimes psychotic Sometimes psychotic is offline
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Hi...so I couldn't find anything on this anywhere on the net so I thought I'd start here. I had a psychotic break 2 years ago but have for the most part recovered although I'm still on the meds. I see my pdoc for thirty minutes every two months but he is always comparing me to other patients. At one point he actually said I was one of his two best patients an proceeded to describe the other one for me. He is always telling me stories about other patients and how I'm not like them. Last session he told me about a guy with serious delusions that he had to sleep with two or possibly three prostitutes to end the voices. He actually went out and did this and now he's in inpatient undergoing ect because he's suicidal. I think this is TMI and it scares the heck out of me when he tells these stories. How do I nicely explain to him that I don't want him to continue this behavior. Also while I like it when he tells me how good I am I feel that it is contributing to some transference I'm feeling so I'd rather he stop telling me I'm good as its disruptive. Any advice is appreciated.
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  #2  
Old May 09, 2013, 04:00 AM
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Lamplighter Lamplighter is offline
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Hello SP - yeah I get how it must feel, on the one hand being praised (but will his opinion of you change if you suddenly get ill again or don't stay as well as you are now?) and on the other hand, hearing him be critical about other patients, as well as giving you so much info about them. I'd be feeling very insecure and anxious in your position.

You've supplied your own solution here, to talk to him about it, at least to let him know how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Perhaps you could write out what you want to say to him and post it here to see if anyone can help you with composing your words?

Hope you can speak to him about this, it's not an easy thing to bring up .

Torn
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  #3  
Old May 09, 2013, 04:03 AM
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Shew - that's wrong of him to be discussing other patients.
I also agree - tell him how you feel. I would be very nervous around my pdoc if he kept talking like that
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  #4  
Old May 09, 2013, 04:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
I think this is TMI and it scares the heck out of me when he tells these stories. How do I nicely explain to him that I don't want him to continue this behavior. Also while I like it when he tells me how good I am I feel that it is contributing to some transference I'm feeling so I'd rather he stop telling me I'm good as its disruptive. Any advice is appreciated.
((Sometimes))

It does raise questions about confidentiality, doesn't it?

What about: "I don't know if you should be telling me so much about your other patients," or "I get scared when you tell me those stories."
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  #5  
Old May 09, 2013, 05:12 AM
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Originally Posted by CantExplain View Post
((Sometimes))

It does raise questions about confidentiality, doesn't it?

What about: "I don't know if you should be telling me so much about your other patients," or "I get scared when you tell me those stories."
Well he's never told me any names so its more like a case study I have no way of ever identifying these patients, so far as I can tell that's totally legit it just scares me. I wish I could tell him to stop when he actually starts telling a story but I'm just not that fast at processing emotions. I feel bad when I get home but I think a part of me feels privileged while I'm there so I just let it keep happening. It's just this last one...I had no idea they even did ect at this hospital and it scares me to think if I went downhill.
  #6  
Old May 09, 2013, 05:35 AM
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Originally Posted by Torn Mind View Post
Hello SP - yeah I get how it must feel, on the one hand being praised (but will his opinion of you change if you suddenly get ill again or don't stay as well as you are now?) and on the other hand, hearing him be critical about other patients, as well as giving you so much info about them. I'd be feeling very insecure and anxious in your position.

You've supplied your own solution here, to talk to him about it, at least to let him know how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Perhaps you could write out what you want to say to him and post it here to see if anyone can help you with composing your words?

Hope you can speak to him about this, it's not an easy thing to bring up .

Torn
The problem is he's been incredibly supportive an I wouldn't want to be without him. He's helped me through everything I'm just thinking he's lost perspective as to what might be scary for me. He wasn't being critical of the other patient he just told me the story to illustrate how well I am in comparison because he wants me off the meds. He's very emotional and was upset about the ect patient. I was too busy countering his points to pay much attention to how I was feeling at the time. I was basically explaining at one point that I thought that if I put all my computers into sleep mode then the voices would stop so I had the same faulty logic as the ect guy. I actually drove into work at 4 am to make sure that my computer was in sleep mode but I couldn't figure out how to do it and turned it off instead...later I was convinced that this is why the voices didn't stop. So instead of stopping the story he escalated it to be more convincing that I am good.

I'll work on some wording here maybe I can just read it to him. Thanks!
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Old May 09, 2013, 05:47 AM
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Sometimes psychotic Sometimes psychotic is offline
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Dear pdoc,

I want to stress that you've been incredibly helpful to me but I'm having some problems when you tell me about other patients. I know you are telling me to help me feel better however it is having the opposite effect. When you tell me about someone who is still having problems with hallucinations or delusions I picture myself back where I was when I first met you and that is a place I no longer want to be. I'd appreciate it if you could stop telling me these stories about other patients as they are terrifying. Again thanks for being so supportive I hope you understand that this is just scary for me and is starting to undermine our therapeutic relationship.

Me
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Old May 09, 2013, 07:41 AM
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Hey SP, that sounds like a pretty good way of telling him what's going on for you . A nice reasonable explanation and an even more reasonable request. Do you plan on explaining this to him face to face, or are you thinking of emailing him?

He does sound like he is only trying to help you and I might have overestimated the kind of info he was giving you about his other patients, as you say, he was trying to get you to see how much healthier you are and so keep you off meds (that makes sense.)

Your deal with the computers in sleep mode could be worrying him perhaps, do you think? And perhaps he's trying too hard to be rational and logical with you and that's what's making him come on too strong? In any event, from your description it sounds like he's an ok Pdoc and your telling him how you feel will not cause any problems.

When do you see him again? Hope it all goes well, let us know.

Torn
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  #9  
Old May 09, 2013, 08:34 AM
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Sometimes psychotic Sometimes psychotic is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Torn Mind View Post
Hey SP, that sounds like a pretty good way of telling him what's going on for you . A nice reasonable explanation and an even more reasonable request. Do you plan on explaining this to him face to face, or are you thinking of emailing him?

He does sound like he is only trying to help you and I might have overestimated the kind of info he was giving you about his other patients, as you say, he was trying to get you to see how much healthier you are and so keep you off meds (that makes sense.)

Your deal with the computers in sleep mode could be worrying him perhaps, do you think? And perhaps he's trying too hard to be rational and logical with you and that's what's making him come on too strong? In any event, from your description it sounds like he's an ok Pdoc and your telling him how you feel will not cause any problems.

When do you see him again? Hope it all goes well, let us know.

Torn
I'm seeing him in 2 weeks that's sort of why I'm worried about it now. The computer in sleep mode thing was 2 years ago when I was actively psychotic. I just wanted him to understand that I was sick...really sick, he should know he put me into the inpatient psych ward for a week and did not really want to let me back out but it was voluntary. But all of that is gone now the problem is he's acting like it never even happened. I'm going to tell him in person because while I have his email address he never really gave it to me for that purpose. He likes me to call and I don't want him over analyzing anyway.
  #10  
Old May 09, 2013, 08:45 AM
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WikidPissah WikidPissah is offline
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I had a pdoc whom I absolutely treasured. He was kind, spoke to me as an equal, and always encouraged me. But he too had a bad little habit of talking about other clients. Once he told me (names changed) "I have a patient that I called this script in for whose name is Peg, but she goes by the name Claire. So I called it in for Claire and they never filled it. So I called it in for Peg and they still didn't fill it. After all of that, I found out her name was legally Margaret, even though her insurance card says Peg."

I was like "WTF?" How many people on this tiny little peninsula have the name Peg but go by Claire, and now I know that the one that does has issues with X because she's on the same med as me.

On time I went in after a smoker and he said "let me open a window, can you believe people walk around smelling like that? They can at least bathe before they come in here".

It was bad. I finally left him, even though I liked him as a treatment provider. I figured if he spoke of other patients like that, he's speak of me like that, and that bothered me.
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Old May 09, 2013, 09:20 AM
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Sometimes psychotic Sometimes psychotic is offline
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Originally Posted by WikidPissah View Post
I had a pdoc whom I absolutely treasured. He was kind, spoke to me as an equal, and always encouraged me. But he too had a bad little habit of talking about other clients. Once he told me (names changed) "I have a patient that I called this script in for whose name is Peg, but she goes by the name Claire. So I called it in for Claire and they never filled it. So I called it in for Peg and they still didn't fill it. After all of that, I found out her name was legally Margaret, even though her insurance card says Peg."

I was like "WTF?" How many people on this tiny little peninsula have the name Peg but go by Claire, and now I know that the one that does has issues with X because she's on the same med as me.

On time I went in after a smoker and he said "let me open a window, can you believe people walk around smelling like that? They can at least bathe before they come in here".

It was bad. I finally left him, even though I liked him as a treatment provider. I figured if he spoke of other patients like that, he's speak of me like that, and that bothered me.
Wow I can't believe he told you her name, mine has never crossed that line even identifying a patient is considered a breach by the APA.

I'm pretty much under the assumption that he talks about me with other patients just in a deidentified way. I like to think I'm a positive example so it doesn't bother me too much. It's just that my pdoc is a schizophrenia specialist so all his stories are scary by default. I'm not sure that he's even aware of it since he works with them(and me) every day.

Thanks for your response.
  #12  
Old May 17, 2013, 04:03 AM
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So this is kind of bad but I think I've changed my mind about this. While I do think the story he told me last time crossed a line, spending a week on the schizophrenia forum here has sort of immunized me. Sure it can be scary but the stories also tell me where I stand with my disease. I'm not sure I want to limit my understanding of the disease in order to feel safe...I think the problem is that I'm not safe and that's what's actually scary.

Oh and now that I've been here a while I realize that most people post about their T's on this forum but my pdoc is a psychoanalyst so we do talk about more than the meds.
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