Narcissistic Injury

I "think" she usually has 5-10 minute gaps. She sort of implied that it was possible she was trying to squeeze someone in and that was why she was a little late and I saw another patient for the first time. Idk. It makes me uncomfortable that she could care too much about clients that aren't me. I know this puts me in a bad light, but there just seems to be no point in trying to hide it anymore.

I usually do have her complete attention. On this particular day, she was being very fidgety though, and I think that only increased my anxiety. Like maybe something serious had happened with the client before and I was bothering her.

It does matter to me how I rate in relation to other client...how T is with other clients. I have no good/logical reasoning for it. It just does. It always has.

Thanks you and to everyone for their comments.

You may have already had your question answered, and if so I apologize for not reading all the posts but, here goes:
A Narcissistic injury is an 'insult'(wound) that is experienced as an attack on the essence of your Self, it is common with depression, not just in someone with a NPDO. We all have these, they originate in childhood. The therapist is helping you with your "wounds", YOU. And it is usual to feel a need to be special and not think that help is diluted by attention to others. Rationally, you know the t. sees others, but this time you were confronted with the discrepancy between your idealized/fantasized "reality" and the real workaday world, and it hurt to the core. Yeah. It hurts. That is OK, we need to face what pains us. hang in there!