[Raging Quiet]

Hi all,

I don't know of its a coincidence, but I always seem to find that outside of the therapy room in the years I see my T; my life gets hard and I fail really important life-changing events.

Yet, when I leave or have a long break, my life becomes more stable and nicer things happen.

Obviously, it isn't as black and white as that, but I was just wondering if anyone else experiences that?

Don't get me wrong, I am in therapy working on trauma, ED recovery and a whole multitude of issues, but it seems life really packs in the punches when it knows I've got 'support'.

Hi rectopathic,
Firstly I really like your positive outlook on it on the last sentence:life really throws in the punches when it knows I have support!
Maybe that's why it falls apart because it knows you have someone to help you put the pieces back together.
I find that when I am in therapy I neglect other areas of my life, such as friends and relationships because I try to work on me and distance myself from others but that alone is a recipe for disaster and am working on that.
Do you find that therapy works for you?
Or do the cons out weigh the pros here?
It could of course be a strange coincidence but maybe there is a reason for it, for example we change when we are in therapy, we become stronger, maybe this does not suit the people in your life and they resist it, causing you strife?

[Perna]

I think it is about focus; you focus on your dreams, you remember more of them; you decide you like red cars, all the cars on the road are red :-) My husband and I did that; he doesn't like pseudo-red cars, just bright red, real red, nicknamed the other shades "putred" (instead of "putrid") and we started seeing a zillion different shades of red cars!

I think when I'm seeing T I want difficulties and challenges so I can learn to deal with them?

[skysblue]

For me, I think it's because I become bolder at facing some painful issues. They're not buried so deeply anymore.

[unaluna]

Putred - that's an excellent word.

Yeah life is tons easier when not seeing a t. Or it just seems smooth and peaceful until the avalanche breaks loose. That's how it goes for me. One bump out of place and it all comes crashing down.

[nessaea]

I feel the same way! I think for me, when I'm not seeing a T, I tend to take less risks, and just kind of go about my life as best I can, so things sail along more smoothly. Also, I tend to build these big walls around myself that keep me safe, and so I'm able to be a lot stronger.

When I am in therapy, however, those walls get broken down every session (and in between sessions as I try to figure stuff out) so I'm more emotionally fragile. Also, I tend to start actively working on my problems when I'm therapy, as opposed to just going with the flow and pushing everything aside.

So, yes, things often get pretty rocky for me while I'm in therapy. However, it is always a good thing in the long term