[adam_k]

Does anyone else feel emmotional numb in therapy. Maybe its not an issue, or necessarily a bad thing. My therapist made a comment to me that I seemed flat. She says a lot of people cry, or get upset when they talk about marriage issues. I've noticed I tend to be a little detached when I talk to her. Does that cause a problem?

[Freewilled]

I'm not sure if it causes a problem because I do the same thing...my T and I have described it as being disconnected. Last week, he reminded me of our discussion about it and said it seemed like I was somewhere else and asked where I went /: I rarely can express traumatic issues with emotion attached and I just tend to intellectualize. My T tries to help me slow down and notice how I feel in my body - but I tend to get stuck.

I think if I can't move past it, it will become a problem for me. I'm hoping it just takes time (?)

[adam_k]

Not expressing my emmotions and needs is a common theme with me. My T pointed it out. I never really noticed it. The only time I noticed it was on the first session when we went over my whole life and I talked about a lot of sensitive issues. It just made me wonder how much I do that and don't notice. I don't really control it. It just sort of happens. It is like I am there, but I feel no emmotions when I think about stuff.

[Freewilled]

I can really relate to how you describe being numb emotionally in sessions and it just happening automatically....my T also has pointed out to me that I seem to suppress my needs in my life and it has been very detrimental in certain past situations. But how to stop? I have no idea right now /:

[adam_k]

That is where I am at myself. Sometimes I dont even know what I need. I guess expressing myself is just foreign to me. I grew up in a house of all guys, and feelings weren't talked about. Everyone was either happy, angry, and mellow.

[littleplum]

Yeah, I guess I could call myself "numb." I talk about my issues (including the very painful stuff) as if I am talking about the weather. I prefer it that way. But i don't know if it is a good thing or bad thing. I guess all the crying and etc has somehow numbed me. Who knows...

[sugahorse1]

Personally, I think you do move past it after a while. It took me about 6 months with my T, and I'm only beginning to feel.
Ultimately, your T needs to get to know you, and what buttons to push. I've asked my T to push me to feel, and she's really good at it. Sure, it sometimes hurts, but it's also an amazing thing to be able to feel. Even if they are negative emotions

[tinyrabbit]

It sounds like an observation rather than a criticism. It's something that will change in time rather than overnight. Maybe she's trying to encourage you to let your feelings out by telling you it's common - ie that it's okay and not something to be afraid of.

[adam_k]

I think that was her point. I didn't feel critized by her comment. I just didn't notice that I do that.