[jesusplay]

I often lie about me having suicidal thoughts when I saw my pdoc and therapist.

I refuse to go, I'm afraid to go inpatient.

So I say "nope, no suicidal thoughts".

met my new pdoc, told her flat out: Go inpatient she says, noooooooooo!(then thunder started and rain started, it was an epic moment)

last time I had an attempt I got really drunk to get over the fear and ambivalence but and I failed.

I'm afraid to die, I'm afraid to go to a mental hospital

[wotchermuggle]

Originally Posted by jesusplay

I often lie about me having suicidal thoughts when I saw my pdoc and therapist.

I refuse to go, I'm afraid to go inpatient.

So I say "nope, no suicidal thoughts".

met my new pdoc, told her flat out: Go inpatient she says, noooooooooo!(then thunder started and rain started, it was an epic moment)

last time I had an attempt I got really drunk to get over the fear and ambivalence but and I failed.

I'm afraid to die, I'm afraid to go to a mental hospital

Your support system can only help you if you're honest. It's tough, but ask them for alternative options to hospitalization.

[GenCat]

I was in a mental hospital for 6 days and it was both the worse and best time of my life. I got better with the meds they gave me. The hospital changed me for the better even though I was terrified in the beginning. I was the youngest there and both the nurses and doctors and the patients cared deeply for me and allowed me to see myself in a new light. Dont be afraid to tell them how you feel, its the only way you can untimely get better.

[kaliope]

getting locked up was always my worst fear in life. but then a very trusted t talked me into it and it was the best thing I ever did for myself. sure it was scary, but I got the care that I needed and the break from reality that I needed to get better. it wasn't so bad going in voluntarily because it was my choice and I made the best of it to get better for me. I was able to stabilize on meds in a safe environment. overall, it was a valuable experience. after that, we found ways to stabilize me outside of the psych facility but it really wasn't so bad when my safety was a concern.

Hi I am in a hospital right now and - although it's not nice to be robbed of freedoms and to have rules dictating every daily aspects - it isn't so bad. My first day was very bad because of my anxiety problems. I don't even go outside my house that often so being in a hospital and sharing my room with someone was a different world. But now I got used to it and I am doing more here than at home. I talk to different people every day, participate in group sessions, take walks etc. The doctors have seen many cases like mine and they know what kind of approaches are best suited.
Of course no two places are the same, so maybe you coudl make an appointment with a few hospitals in order to talk to a doctor about their treatments.
It is an option to consider if your doctors have mentioned it to you. A hospital would be a safe place for you where you would get the chance to deal with your issues with the help of experienced professionals. It is not the most fun place in the world but it might be the place where you start to feel better.
good luck making the right choice for you