Therapist always cuts sessions short

Hi,
I've been seeing a therapist since late March, and initially, she saw me for fifty minutes. The third session, she communicated that her sessions were forty five minutes. I am not opposed to a 45 minute session, but I noticed that she always starts late and ends early. She piggybacks clients so if a session ends at 4, she has another session starting at 4:05. However, this means that she gets me at 4:10 for a 4:05 session and lets me go at 4:45. I have been struggling with how to communicate with her that I'd like to get the time to which I am entitled and that I feel that our treatment is going nowhere in part because of her decision to end early, do scheduling, and then release me early. I don't want to disrespect her or make her upset by bringing it up, but I do think it's important that she knows that that is a big reason I don't disclose. We are pretty close in age, which makes our dynamic somewhat complicated sometimes (both young). I've had one other therapist before and I felt it was a waste of two years. Now, I actually feel like work is getting done, but she's not giving me the time I deserve. What do I do?

Do you feel you can bring this up with your T? I think if you bring it up in a non-confrontational manner, it will be your best chance for a positive outcome.

If I could suggest a possible way, if I were you, I'd say, "I notice that our sessions begin at X and end at X and I was wondering if you'd changed your appointments to X minutes instead of the X minutes you mentioned when we first started?"

If your T goes on the super-defensive, I'd respond with, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make a big issue about it. I just was feeling frustrated because I didn't understand why there was a change and just wanted to bring it up so we could discuss it. I felt that if I didn't, it would start to negatively impact our sessions."

That does seem like she's cutting it close. My t runs on the same type of schedule, every 45 minutes, but he doesnt take a full 10 minutes to change clients. That's kind of ridiculous. I feel like I get my full time, I'm probably in the room before the first 5 minutes are up, altho I've never checked.

It might save some time if you got a regularly scheduled time? Then you wouldnt have to waste 5 minutes establishing it, you could just say, okay see you next week. I can understand not wanting to make her mad, but feeling like she's taking advantage of you just because it's like she suspects you won't speak up. You wish she would be a better person and just not do that.

So part of the lesson is to figure out how to be totally Miss Manners and "confront" her nicely. One of my t's once told me, why aren't you using your smarts to "get around" your coworkers, I know you could! But I was in the middle of being bullied by my family and so I let work bully me too. AND that t. Really dumb of me. But too scary to use my smarts.

Yes no maybe?

Print out what you just wrote here and take it to her. It may not change anything, but at least you'll have let her know how you feel about it.

I think I might comment on the time I sit down in the room, something like this:
"So, it's 4:10 and the session is 45 minutes, so we'll end at 4:55, right?" It is not helpful when you can't depend on the time, or know when a session will end. I would establish that each session, if needed. Then you will know the ending time of each session, and she might become more aware of her time management issues..

I wouldn't apologise for bringing it up. You have nothing to apologise for!

I would give a couple of examples (on x day your session was delayed until x so you only had x minutes) and ask if she realises you're not getting your full session time.

I have a big issue with her piggybacking clients like that. Is she in private practice?

my T seems to be doing the same thing.i have not been able to bring it up with her either .I like what wotchermuggle said

I would have a hard time bringing it up but being that I'm passive aggressive I would just start asking how much time do we have left and if it conflicts with my time I would bring it uo

Yes, she is in private practice. The story is worse than this but I don't want her to be identifiable, so I won't share it on the forum, but lets just say-- the piggybacking clients thing is not the most concerning thing for me.

Geez...wonder what you mean above...anyway, that is not right. Whenever my T runs late, she makes it a point to say, " I'm sorry I am running late. You will still get your entire hour." Your T should do the same, and I would definitely bring it up, in a non-confrontational way.

What does piggybacking clients mean? It is a phrase I am not familiar with.

I believe it means scheduling clients back-to-back, without a break in between them. My T does this too.

I hate piggybacking, too. My ex-T always took 10 minutes in between (and scheduled his sessions that way) to take his own mental break or whatever he needed, and it made total sense to me. One of mine piggybacks now (sometimes), and the other won't but sometimes he ends up running late...but I always get my full time so I can't complain.

I would definitely bring this up with your T...but everyone else has already given you great suggestions so all I can say is I hope it goes well and that you definitely deserve all of your time!

Yes, piggybacking meanss having back-to-back clients.

She once saw her own therapist (same building-- I saw her walk out of his office) before she saw me, and she came to my session late, red-eyed, and wiping tears. We didn't discuss it, and we ended early, but I was so uncomfortable the whole time, that I was dying to get out.

I'll try this next week and will try to schedule a permanent session time so that it stops being such a problem! Thank you all for your help.

Sessions used to be 50 minutes until codes changed and switched to 45 minutes, ironically so what you are talking about wouldn't happen. It used to be a 50 minutes session and then the other 10 of the hour allotted to writing a progress report on the client. Now they are switched to 45 minutes to give the therapist a 5 minute break in between clients, if they are piggybacking clients as you put it.

I would definately bring it up to her. Don't be aggresive about it or anything, just simply say something like, "I know that our sessions are now 45 minutes, and I feel like we are doing really great work together. I have noticed though, that even tho we always end on time, we usually start late. (give example)." I think that just bringing it to the table for conversation will help things. she might not even realize how much of your session is being cut off.

Thank you, but we never end on time. We always start late and end early.

I am in the middle of switching T's to someone I think is better qualified for my issues.
One of the things I will probably have to do is adjust to exact timing of my session.
The person who I am (probably) leaving is over generous with her time. There have been times when we have gone almost a hour and 45 minutes. In fact she has never brought the session to a close!. On a couple of occasions there have been people waiting as I left, but usually not. And maybe twice I was kept waiting myself. Once for 30 minutes but I wasn't upset as I knew she would spend her full time with me.
Her practice is well established so I know its not due to lack of clients. I think she just allows plenty of time between them. Ive seen the new T only once but she brought the session to a close slightly over my allotted time and there was a person waiting and I heard her apologize for the wait.
Anyway if I was in your situation I would work up the courage to say something. I hate even mild confrontation with people of authority but you are paying for the time so you should be getting it.

peace

I thought you said that you started at 4:10 and ended at 4:45. if your appointment was supposed to start at 4:00, then you would end at 4:45. so therefore you ended on time. but started late?

No, the OP said the appointment was scheduled for 4:05. Therefore, it should end at 4:50. It started late (4:10 instead of 4:05) and ended early (4:45 instead of 4:50).

I agree with the others who recommend that you ask your T about it at the beginning of your session. I like the suggestion of saying, right as you sit down, it is X time. Does that mean I have 45 min from now, which would be X:XX." I think that may be the only way to get your full time.

I am also concerned when you say that time isn't your biggest issue with this T. Can you give us anymore information on what kind of an issue you are talking about?

Oh my bad... thanks scorpiosis...

'Piggybacking' potentially causes loads of problems. If the session starts late, it has to be cut short or the next client suffers. The T doesn't have time to rest, recharge or go over the client's notes between sessions, and goodness knows when they go to the toilet.

I think you are getting "shortchanged" by your T with her cutting sessions short. My prior T tended to "run late" but didn't shorten the sessions because of it. It can be hard to be assertive, but I think you need to address the issue directly in a non-confrontational manner. Tell your T that you have noticed your sessions often start after the appointed time but tend to end at the same "ending time" - and that you need a full session. You would be stating the facts and telling your T what you need. And, it is what you deserve. If your T is having problems running her schedule, that is *her* issue. It is not your fault and you deserve a full session. If you aren't getting that on a regular basis and she isn't receptive to your feedback and willing to improve the situation - I think it may be in your best interest to find another T. Best wishes and keep us posted. *hugs*

Hey OP,

Have you has a session since writing this post? Have you managed to bring this up? x

My t kept being late and i brought it up to her. She praised me for doing that. Ir is about standing up for yourself. If you are unhappy about ANYthing in therapy, it needs to be brought up,, otherwise you will stay upset and frustrated. You are paying her for a service.

I have noticed that the t's I have dealt with lately have all gone to 45 minutes. I didn't realize it was a code that changed. My son's appointments are sometimes cut short-starting late but finishing on time. She does respond to emails when needed, though, so I feel like this her time as well. If it was a constant, I might complain.
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