[rainbow8]

My session went well! She didn't think it was at all rude for me to bring up wanting to ask her for a painting. She said it's "grist for the mill." I have a great T. Did I ever say that before?!

She didn't give me a yes or no answer, but told me that she doesn't paint pictures for anyone; she paints for herself and if someone likes it, they can buy it. She doesn't make cards like I do, and doesn't have prints. She said she wouldn't sell me a painting, but not because it crosses boundaries or anything like that.

So, we talked about what it would mean if she gave me a painting, and about my gift experiences in my family.

Then we talked about Plan B. She's done joint paintings with other clients, apparently, or maybe with other people, and she's perfectly willing to do that with me. We could use acrylic, she said. We wouldn't do it at my last session, though.

So, doing it together is a good idea but I said I felt sad if I can't have a painting because it's something SHE does, that I'd like to have. She does get clients gifts, but she said it's more like something for the person, like a pretty journal for them to write in. I said I don't want a journal! We agreed that it's something I want from her life, not mine. She does not think that's part of my pattern; she understands and says we'll just be curious about it for now.

I said maybe having photos of her painting would satisfy me, so I took a picture of the two that are in the office. She also let me take photos of her! I had brought my camera to show her photos of my messy house, and of my Dad's paintings, NOT to take pictures of her. I was NOT in a needy mood; I think that's why she let me. I wasn't whining, and kept telling her I know I'm being rude about asking for a painting, and she kept telling me I wasn't!

So, I probably won't get a painting because she doesn't have them "sitting around" but I'll probably get to see photos of them, and we'll get to paint together. At the moment, I'm okay with that because she didn't reject me, and because she understands why I want something of HERS.

It was a pretty good session. I like that I can tell my T anything!

[Wren_]

that grist for the mill comment sounds so yalom'ish
that's great you had such a good session rain; and that now you already have some photos of her artwork to keep AND you have photos of her

That sounds promising Rainbow and congrats for asking her- takes a lot of courage! I like the idea of doing one together, maybe it could symbolise your journey together and how far you have come.
You do have the best t

[sittingatwatersedge]

Rainbow!!!!!
the idea of you and yr T making a painting together sounds (to me, who doesn't paint) absolutely wonderful.

maybe you could do two, so she could have a joint one too.

I hope you find a happy answer to this need

SAWE

[tinyrabbit]

I think painting together sounds amazing.

That's so great that she let you photograph her. Never occurred to me to do that but now I want to photograph my T, doubt I would have the courage to ask him though

[rainbow8]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

that grist for the mill comment sounds so yalom'ish
that's great you had such a good session rain; and that now you already have some photos of her artwork to keep AND you have photos of her

Thanks, tigergirl. Yes, I am happy with how I handled my session today. I think it went so well because the part who's "in love with my T" wasn't there. I think it was my Self who was there, recognizing that my T is very important to me and how much I like her, and wanting our relationship to be special, but knowing that I'm an adult and can act like one. T and I talked about my needs but I felt equal to her, and not like a whiny child, or a love-sick teenager!

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

That sounds promising Rainbow and congrats for asking her- takes a lot of courage! I like the idea of doing one together, maybe it could symbolise your journey together and how far you have come.
You do have the best t

Thank you. I only stalled for about 1 minute then started talking about it!! I'm looking forward to painting with my T.

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

Rainbow!!!!!
the idea of you and yr T making a painting together sounds (to me, who doesn't paint) absolutely wonderful.

maybe you could do two, so she could have a joint one too.

I hope you find a happy answer to this need

SAWE

Thanks, SAWE. I don't know if T wants a joint painting too, but I'd like to do 2 anyway!

Originally Posted by tinyrabbit

I think painting together sounds amazing.

That's so great that she let you photograph her. Never occurred to me to do that but now I want to photograph my T, doubt I would have the courage to ask him though

I must be fortunate because I'm not afraid to ask my T most questions. She doesn't scare me that way, though she used to. I think her constantly reassuring me that nothing is TMI, and we can be curious about anything I bring up, made me feel safe with her. If she had said "no", I couldn't take her picture, we would have discussed why I wanted to and how I felt when she said "no".

[Asiablue]

I actually think creating something together could give you some very special memories, plus you get to keep the finished product. Your T is awesome Rainbow, but then you already know that

[sweepy62]

That session sounded absolutely amazing you have a wonderful t I'm so happy for you can't wait for you to star your painting with your t

[rainbow8]

Originally Posted by Asiablue

I actually think creating something together could give you some very special memories, plus you get to keep the finished product. Your T is awesome Rainbow, but then you already know that

Thanks, Asia. Now I'm wondering how to put abstract art (T's) and my realistic art (I'd want to paint objects in her office) together in one painting! Or, maybe I'll go for the abstract too, which is more relaxing but in my opinion, isn't "good" art. T and I will talk more about my reasons for painting--whether it's for process, or product.

Originally Posted by sweepy62

That session sounded absolutely amazing you have a wonderful t I'm so happy for you can't wait for you to star your painting with your t

Yes, I'm looking forward to it, though I don't want to ignore the other issues left to talk about in therapy! Good luck with your group--isn't it today?

[A Red Panda]

Why not go all Picasso-style? Then you're painting some object... but in an abstract way. haha

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by A Red Panda

Why not go all Picasso-style? Then you're painting some object... but in an abstract way. haha

Outstanding idea!!!