Couch 61: How Long Will it Last?

Control?? Dont get me started. Thats an order ok. See..I need to learn to give up some control quite clearly. Sigh

Have a good day MUE..hope you get some sleep at some time....

It is pouring with rain here now and I NEED to go to bed as have to be up at 6 and muster my 6 yearold into action also at that time....good luck to me with that!

LOL, JaneC......Hope you can get to sleep quickly! Goodnight!

Nope would be the answer, although it appears I am not trying very hard! My mind will not stop making lists and checking I have ticked evrything off. And now even the rain is beginjing to bug me......it is pretty heavy though and loud persistant noise sometimes triggers me a lot. Ahh c-ptsd give me a break tonight ok?

Going to listen to a guided meditation......maybe that will work.

Night All All

glad you got some sleep mue.
hi janc
jersey good luck with the kids today

heading out to see if the nurses survived my farther lastnight

Good morning all... It's a dark cloudy day here in paradise. Ick.
I am moving very slowly this morning. I don't have a ton to do today, but I really need to NOT sleep the day away again. Hard not to climb back into bed though.

My daughter is doing great in school...of course, she is an over achiever. Hmmm, I wonder where she gets that from? She is one of 2 students (out of 50) that are in 90/90...which means a higher than 90 gpa and more than 90% attendance. She'd actually be 100/100 if they had that. I am really proud of her, given her disability, to be able to push thru the pain and exhaustion of a 40 hr week on her feet. I am still a little disappointed that she didn't choose to go back for her Masters...but that's just me, and she's only 23, who's to say she can't do it later on.

Granite...
I hope your dad has a speedy recovery!

hi wiki. my guess she probably will go back in time .

hey chickie...

Yea, maybe. BUT...it's my dream to have a master's...not hers. She and her bf dream of a quite cape cod life much like the one she was raised in. He's owns and operates a large marine repair shop. They are blue collar..just like H and I. And there is no reason that they cannot be happy.

I have been going to this Spine & Pain center for the last few weeks...getting Novocain shots in my ribs and back. I have a lot of inflammation in my chest wall from the radiation and surgeries. They recommended I buy an ice vest, but sheesh...the things are a few hundred bucks. I just found one on amazon for $57...hmmmm.

Wiki...a couple of hundred dollars sounds worth it if it helps with the pain...

I would say get the proper ice vest right off the bat. If it helps relieve pain, I would think the cost was worth it. I hope it (whichever you get) does help.

Yea...I know. I just hate spending money on myself.

SD...do you take Turmeric? I have upped my dose, and it usually helps a lot for inflammation, but not helping much. I think I need to research other herbs.

I am back on an anti-psychotic too. ICK! Probably the main reason I am sleeping so much. That isn't going to last long. Grrrrr.

I don't take it as a supplement but I eat it several times a week because I use it a lot for cooking. I think ginger is also helpful for inflammation. I have started adding more cinnamon to my diet.

SO...as long as I am talking to myself...

D is bringing home great hair products. She's taking extra classes on organic and natural hair skin and nail treatments. She does this seaweed facial that is incredible. She also is using soy based waxes for depilation. AND...it is so nice to get weekly mani's and pedi's as she likes to practice on me.

oops...

Yea, I do use fresh turmeric and ginger. I also take a supplement, and I always add it to my juice. Now cinnamon, I haven't been getting nearly enough. That's a good idea.

what a horrible day can I have a do over .my farther is doing good to start with and I am thankful for. but some people IRL that I thought were some good peeps to hang around with seem to have completely rejected me now and I don't know what I did . it hurts .I should know better .why get involved with people .my T lies most people suck. love you guys though

Hi Granite. do you want to talk about what happened? You could PM me if you want.

Sometimes I feel rejected by other people IRL too... but then I find that there is a reasonable explanation for what feels like rejection... Anyway... maybe you could ask one of the people that you felt closest to about it so you could check what their thoughts really are.

Glad your father is improving.

So as I'm sitting here... my anxiety has just been escalating... my heart is running faster... my sholders are so tense... its unbelievable how quickly it came on... Just at the thought of going to see xT...

funny thing is I feel fine now... I guess I better go back and read old posts to remind myself how upset I was... I am so good at shoving feelings down and denial.

thanks ready I think it is me just messing up my life .I just don't know how to do people right.it is frustrating. it has to do with the peeps that I started scrapbooking with .it is Fairley new to me. anyway feeling kind of rejected by them .kind of like the new kid trying to fit in with a new school .people thinking I am stepping on old friendship and all . I hate people

why are going to see him again. is it to work out stuff that went on with him or to try and get back into T

I wonder what my xT would do if I brought in coloring book and crayons.... its easier to not filter what you say when one part of brain in concentrating on coloring and it can't function well enough to have you color, talk to T and have your own conversation in your head...

Granite... I'm going to see xT because I really need someone who knows the background to help me with my feelings about myself in regards to H... and because I do some really pretty messed up crap in my head with regards to my marriage and how my H treats me and I've never really talked to anyone about it and its now causing lots of distress