If your purpose for going is simply looking for an argument do you think it's time to walk? The interesting thing is, I mentioned last week that for a while I've picked up my T having hostile feelings towards me. I just sensed that in her, and in response I could feel tension building in me to a dislike back at her. Her response was that she this way because of my aggressive defensive way of being, and that she's trying to keep up with me in session, because I talk quick, I'm looking around constantly at the clock, I fidget with my feet etc..

She also said that " if you're looking for a fight then bring it on " was her genuine emotion and started moving her hands in a boxing way with closed fists. She got the impression I was looking for a fight with her ( not physical obviously ), whereas I got the impression she's looking for a fight with me and have the exact same attitude towards her.

What she said though with moving her hands seems like a challenge to me. I feel enticed to go back simply to have a huge argument with this T. It kinda feels enjoyable, but a part of me thinks I'm a man and she's a woman and this is all kinda petty and a waste of money. Another part of me feels I have unfinished business, I really want to see her anger at me so I can blow up back. If I walk away I'm forever going to view this T with a strong dislike and anger.

My destructive side needs to be unleashed I feel. In many ways it would feel somehow therapeutic to me.

[tooski]

No, I don't think it's time to walk. It sounds like your therapy is moving right along, and I'm serious!! I've had numerous angry exchanges with T over the past 2+ years, and as he says, all emotions are welcome here. Therapy is not an intellectual exercise, nor is it all polite and rational. There have been times when I've felt like T and I were flailing around in a mud pit. I can't believe how dirty and messy it can get - this was a real surprise. And it was confirmed by another T I consulted with on a 1-time basis. I described the whole mess of a situation to him, and he smiled and said, "It sounds like your therapy is right on track." That was a year ago, and yes, he was right. So that's why I'm saying to you that I think you're on track too.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with going to T simply because you want to fight. Those are your emotions, they're genuine, and there's a reason you're feeling them. Keep going and work thru it. It sounds like your T is up to the challenge.
I just wanted to encourage you by sharing my experience. I had no idea how down & dirty it can get - or feel like it's getting. It would be much nicer to just sit on the couch sipping a cup of tea and have a lightbulb go on, all clean & neat. Rarely happens that way I guess!!

[skeksi]

My T cheered when I said I was looking for a fight.

So--it's worth discussing with your T. How you feel about wanting to fight is worth talking about.

[FeelTheBurn]

Sure, why not? That anger is there for a reason, most likely not having anything to do with your T, and that's the best and safest place to let it out and discover where it comes from.

As long as that "destructive side" stays on your side of the room, I say go for it!