[growlithing]

I've moved from residential treatment to partial hospitalization. I've been doing quite well and thought you guys might appreciate that update. I'm still seeing my T every weekday a lot so that should contextualize the situation.

Today, I told my T that I get really happy when she comes to work in the morning. I said I feel excited and literally think "mom's back!" . I want to run to her and hug her like a little girl may run to her mother when she comes home from work. My T started tearing up when I said that. I asked her why she was teary and she said "that was really cute and so sweet. Thank you for sharing that".

Now, here I am, reading into it like hell. Does this mean she feels like I am her daughter and she feels touched that I feel the same way? Was she merely just empathizing with me? I feel like it might be a sign that she loves me in a maternal way, but I can't seem to allow myself to accept that without her telling me that she loves me.

[Syra]

Originally Posted by growlithing

I've moved from residential treatment to partial hospitalization. I've been doing quite well and thought you guys might appreciate that update. I'm still seeing my T every weekday a lot so that should contextualize the situation.

Today, I told my T that I get really happy when she comes to work in the morning. I said I feel excited and literally think "mom's back!" . I want to run to her and hug her like a little girl may run to her mother when she comes home from work. My T started tearing up when I said that. I asked her why she was teary and she said "that was really cute and so sweet. Thank you for sharing that".

Now, here I am, reading into it like hell. Does this mean she feels like I am her daughter and she feels touched that I feel the same way? Was she merely just empathizing with me? I feel like it might be a sign that she loves me in a maternal way, but I can't seem to allow myself to accept that without her telling me that she loves me.

If my T said that, it would mean that he was very touched by what I said, and itwasn't indicating a change in the professional relationship into something different. (I debated whether to say "something more" but I don't think that's accurate. I thnk if a T-cl relationship becomes more than just T-cl, there is something gained, and something lost. The protective container of the therapy room is somewhat pierced. That doesn't mean I think it's always a bad idea to share gifts, get rides, or something beyond the T-cl container, just that it's different, not therapy + something more.)

[Daeva]

I agree with Syra on this one, I tihnk she was just really touched by what you had to say, not that it meant that she viewed you as a daughter. Sometimes I'll hear something touching and tear up and it won't even be directed at me.

[growlycat]

But tears do signify strong emotion. She must be fond of you, even if she can't literally be your mom she can still love you.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by growlycat

But tears do signify strong emotion. She must be fond of you, even if she can't literally be your mom she can still love you.

I think she loves me. I've been too scared to ask because I know she won't tell me. But I really think she does but I just want her to say it so I have permission to interpret her in that way.

[FeelingOpaque]

I think that was a beautiful moment, and you should cherish it, leave it at that. She can't become your maternal figure because it would hurt the T relationship and she wouldn't be able to help you anymore. If she does love you, why must you have her say it? Why do you have to have her as your mother figure?

[Petra5ed]

I think she felt touched by what you said to her, and it seems like she cares about you a great deal. I would bet she does love you. In my mind it doesn't necessarily mean she sees you as a daughter, but it's possible and actually I think I read it was common in a therapy relationship for a T to feel a maternal/paternal role. T's have their own countertransference and can also become attached, it's kind of human nature since therapy is such an intimate relationship. To be honest, I think she also feels empathy for the pain you must have endured in your past, since that is what causes strong transferences like this, like there is a twinge of pain behind that feeling you have toward her.

About her saying whether she loves you or not, I would not be surprised if she won't answer that question. Most T's (I think) would not say it because it could be easy to confused with sexual feelings, and they take an oath not to do or say anything that could be interpreted as a sexual message. Supposedly once you both say that you "love" each other the therapy relationship is forever changed.

[Rosondo]

that was touching, thanks for sharing, and I'm glad you doing better.

Your T sound very fond of you-I would be very touched if someone had the same to me.
Glad to here that you're doing better

[Rzay4]

Thanks for the update, your T is so proud and touched by your presence. She cares for you deeply.

[A Red Panda]

That's really sweet that she said that. If I were you though, I'd try to just accept it as-is instead of trying to put more into it. In the end, you might just end up tainting a really good thing because you will end up disappointed that your T isn't your mom and almost certainly isn't going to say "I love you" to you.

[Bill3]

I've moved from residential treatment to partial hospitalization. I've been doing quite well and thought you guys might appreciate that update.

This is so great to hear!

Thanks so much for letting us know!