Help - really don't know what to do :(

Bentay · 03:08 PM

My final therapy session is next week and I really don't know what to do. I knew the last session date a couple of months back (Ive been in CBT for two years) but we have hardly ever spoken about the ending and I really don't feel my T has prepared me for it. I have never been in therapy before so have no experience.
Also, what hasn't helped is that I lost my job of 14 years around 9 weeks ago and have found it very difficult to come to terms with the loss, so most of my remaining sessions I spent in tears about this (maybe its my fault) so my T has hardly spoken about the end of therapy but now the end has almost come and I don't know what to say or do and I don't really think I can do anything at this late stage. The only thing my T has mentioned is that it may help if I go onto group therapy.
Im so sorry if Im being a pain as Ive posted about termination before but I would really appreciate any advice.

purplemystery · Dec 14, 2013, 03:05 PM

I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through such a tough time.

Ending any relationship is always a loss. One of the hardest things about termination is that a client's work is never exactly "complete." There will always be issues that arise, things left unexamined. And it sounds like you haven't had time to process the end. I'm not sure what your situation is exactly, but I'm guessing you are being forced to end therapy sooner than you would like? That does make it even harder.

It's good that you still have one session left though (is there no way that you can have more than that?). My suggestion is to reflect on your time together. What will it mean to you to end therapy? What have you gained, and what are you losing? Write out everything that you are feeling, and either read it out loud, give it to her, or e-mail it to her before your session so that you won't leave anything out. You don't want to have any regrets about your experience. I hope it goes as well as it possibly can. I will only be seeing my T for another few months, and I am dreading the ending. I can only imagine how painful this must be for you.

Perna · Dec 14, 2013, 03:23 PM

I would talk about the termination and difficulties you are having, especially in light of your work termination, this next week and see if a plan to address the "problems" it raises for you can be figured out. A group might me a great idea, get details and a bit of information on how it might help, etc. If you can hammer out a plan with your T this coming week for moving forward on your own you might feel more purposeful and less at a loss?

RTerroni · Dec 14, 2013, 05:06 PM

Just try to make the most of it (maybe try to sum up all of the work you have done together) I was in this same situation at this time last year.

rainbow8 · Dec 14, 2013, 09:38 PM

Does this have to be your final session? Many Ts like you to have more than one session to discuss termination. Maybe because it's CBT?

I would write down anything that's on your mind so you won't forget. Any questions or comments you want to tell him. Has he recommended any particular group for you? That would be something to discuss, too. You might ask, if he doesn't tell you, what he sees as your progress, and what you still need to work on.

I hope it goes well for you, but I know how hard termination is. You're not being a pain, and you can post as much as you want, after your session, for support.

Bentay · Dec 15, 2013, 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow8

Does this have to be your final session? Many Ts like you to have more than one session to discuss termination. Maybe because it's CBT?

I would write down anything that's on your mind so you won't forget. Any questions or comments you want to tell him. Has he recommended any particular group for you? That would be something to discuss, too. You might ask, if he doesn't tell you, what he sees as your progress, and what you still need to work on.

I hope it goes well for you, but I know how hard termination is. You're not being a pain, and you can post as much as you want, after your session, for support.

Thank you so much to everyone for your support, it means a lot

Rainbow 8 unfortunately this is the final session. My T did say that in Jan there would be a review session after a 4 week gap to see how I'm doing. I'm going to try and ask/say as much as I can in the final session like everyone suggests. My T didn't give any details about the group although I asked (He just said he would give me some written info at the next final session - it was all a bit vague).