Fear. What does your T do if you start to cry in session?

I cry pretty much every session with my new t. Rarely did with previous one. She hands me tissues, says soothing things and just waits for the storm to pass. It's all so helpful because we are working on affect regulation so that we can begin emdr. Obviously my emotions are all over the place right now and she needs to see that so she can help me with some coping skills. It's good to be able to use these skills as the storm is happening. It's more helpful to me than talking about it abstractly.

My T sits there in silence and watches me. Nothing more. No words, no touch. Nothing.

Oh wow I'm tearing up right now. I can't remember if I've cried in session. I recently had a closure session with my former T. It was really hard and I miss her so much. I miss her voice so much. My current T I know I'll cry when we do trauma work. I hate being vulnerable, thanks for this thread.

Sometimes, she does nothing but listen. Other times, she rubs my back and says "you're okay. I'm right here. You're safe. No one will hurt you. I will protect you and you're safe".

I've only shed tears in therapy. No full out crying yet. We are working on it as we talk about trauma and loss. I'm extremely scared. When I've shed tears, she acknowledged that there is some emotion coming up. I remember the first time, she said it was my first time and she wanted to know what was causing the emotion. I couldn't say it all well I could I didn't because I knew to say it all would mean to start bawling.

I'm still scared to cry full out because crying is messy in my opinion. I've never cried in front of anyone. I typically cry in my bed lying down on my stomach. So, to sit up and cry and have someone watch me is scary. Tomorrow is the next session. I doubt there will be tears but trauma and loss is the focus now and with that comes tears and lots of them. I'm scared!

I have had some strong emotions but ended up smirking and smiling through out. Though I have very nearly shed some tears. I had to fight hard to not let them out. I think A. is noticing, the more I feel emotions, the more I smile or smirk.

I do the same if I am lying. I smirk all the more and sometimes laugh. Even more so if he touches a subject, that is what is happening to me right now, in secret. Behind my barricade. So I'm not great at lying. I'm not great at hiding my emotions, because in one way or another, it's going to come out in a laugh, smirk or smile. And he'll know.

I could have written the last paragraph as I'm the same. It feels very scary if it ever come to me crying in front of anyone x

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My therapist likes to say, "Let it go." I try very hard not to cry in front of her. I resist, I pinch myself, bite the inside of my cheek, hold my breath, tense my muscles, etc. just so that I don't let myself go, so that I don't lose control. Last week was interesting. She was having me describe what my sadness looked like and then she had me close my eyes and we did a guided imagery exercise where she had me imagine my words and feelings moving past the grief "blockage" in my throat. She had me imagine my feelings being freed so that I could recreate my inner self the way that I wanted and liked. I could tell she wanted me to speak my freed thoughts and feelings out loud but I didn't. Anyway, while we were doing this I could feel tears running down my face and I had a lot of trouble breathing but I felt better about crying with my eyes closed.

I don't know if this is strange or not but I feel a lot better and a lot more connected to my T if, when I am describing difficult thoughts and feelings, I notice tears in her eyes. If I feel she shares some part of my experience through empathy or sympathy I feel a lot better. It is really moving to me to see my therapist moved to tears.

Of the many times I've cried, she has gotten me the box of tissue and place it in front of me and took one or two out and handed me them. It's a very small gesture, but it means so much more. Make's you feel like they really do care.