Therapist as Scapegoat

Maybe. For me, forgiveness has begun with the intent to forgive, but acceptance of what is has been the starting point.

You're still embroiled in anger at what you perceive Madame T didn't give you (which is what suggests that this is an older pain than that connected to Madame T); you don't seem to have ever accepted her actions. It's very possible to accept her actions, and yet disagree with them. That would drain the gnawing emotion from the situation, opening the possibility of forgiveness. But forgiving is also a process of both letting go and giving back.