Question...

Anyone ever had an experience where your T always offered a hug or handshake at the end of your session and then one week, he/she just didn't offer? If so, did it bother you? Did you talk about it?

If not, do you think this would bother you? Would you bring it up with your T?

Never experienced it. If I did then yes it would bother me, and yes I would bring it up.

This. We never hug or shake hands but if he suddenly stopped I'd wonder why.

She has not offered me a hug only a times. A couple of them was when she was fighting a cold and didn't want to give it to me but she told me. The only other time was one day that I was in a really bad space and was having problems with people touching me...I was even feeling uncomfortable when my son wanted to cuddle he is 12 and I LOVE to snuggle with him. So she didn't give me a hug but I assumed it was because she knew what was going on.

This is where T and I are now. At first she would offer a hug, sometimes I would accept and sometimes I would refuse. And then one day she just stopped. I thought we were over that and then three weeks later she offered again. So I tried to find a pattern to it, and ultimately there was none because she eventually just stopped offering.

At first it bothered me a little bit because right around the time she stopped offering, I was beginning to get used to the idea. But, it wasn't more than a session or two before I just got over it.

THEN, I noticed that whenever we 'conclude' I automatically turned my back to her (and faced the door) and I really think that the hugs stopped partially because she didn't want a hug (not like I ever asked for them) but also partially because my body language could have very well suggested that I didn't want to be hugged (though not 100% true).

Regardless, although the hugs have stopped, she still does an arm rub/pat and well wish for the week at the end of the session (back turned to her or not) and although I don't react, I do appreciate the sentiment of it all.

This is one reason - and perhaps a good one - why some Ts don't hug at all.

My T and I hug at the end of sessions. Every once in a while she'll forget to offer (I don't bring it up because I have troubles asking for that type of thing), and so we don't. But it's just forgetfulness, and it only rarely happens. Only once has she said she won't hug me because we were both sick with colds and we obviously didn't want to spread our germs to each other even more. I think if she was super sporadic about it, it would bother me, but I know that when she forgets, it's not because of anything I did.

I had the experience where T always sent an email picture during breaks. Than last break nowt.
T had forgotten. I at first wanted to get all hurt and betrayed, but eventually I worked it through and I saw the bigger picture, sometimes people forget but that doesn't change all what's gone on before.
It's good when this stuff happens in therapy. With a safe person. One that knows how to address our fears and pain.