[Christina86]

Joined a group that starts today - for self-exploration and learning.

Supposedly to learn about myself better - offered at my university through the counselling services. Was recommended by my counsellor, so I will go and check it out. Not really much to say except it might be really interesting, or alienating. I can't work in a group - nobody ever wants me in their group!

Basically we'll be journalling, talking, and doing activities to "get to know ourselves better".

I just hope it goes well - so here's to hoping.

good luck with it all, be sure to let me know how it goes.

you say you arent good in a group...you are good in this group, for sure. and this is a big group lol. and besides, this group therapy will help you learn how to be in groups and how to wwork with groups to achieve goals.

i wish you all the best canders.

speak soon

simon

Yes, this might be a great opportunity to practice being in a group & you may find you are not as inept as you think. When I was in group therapy, I always felt I didn't add meaningful things & that I was socially backwards. I'm still a loner, but the people in the group said that you can't tell that I feel that way, that I don't come across as a social outcast so that helped me IRL--I'm not so self-conscious in public. I used to think people at the grocery store, for example, could tell I was "weird."

Hope the group is helpful. Use all the resources you can get!--Suzy

[Perna]

It sounds very exciting. Wish they had something like that for people out of school. I'm trying to find a "group" I might be interested in joining but it's so scary joining something already established.

[Christina86]

Thanks (((((((((everyone))))))))

Truth betold, I didn't much like it today. It involved too much abstract stuff and trying to talk to people about myself that I've never met before is next to impossible.

I wish I could quit it - but since I went to the one session they expect you to stay for all 9 (approx) of them.

Maybe next week will be better.

stick at it, it wont be an overnight success. just go to the next few and see how you feel, its bound to be uncomfortable to begin with, what isnt?

hope it improves. when is your next one?

simon

[Christina86]

Its a weekly thing - so next Thursday.

I just wish it was a bit easier, I feel the need to control myself and you just can't in those kinds of situations. (grumble)

they exist to help people, and it is completely natural to feel the way you do canders. so just stick at it and see how you feel after a few more sessions. and say to them at the next one that you are uncomfortable about the situation, and i bet many others will agree.

take care

simon

[JustAPixie]

Maybe you need to learn to release control and that is why you find it so difficult??? I admire you for doing a group thing... I hope you benefit from it in the end!

[Christina86]

Hi all,

Today was the 2nd session. Its so hard to be there and talk and try to share a part of myself. I'm either not talking enough, and when I do start to talk - I feel like I'm doing too much or not making sense.

I just can't win.

I like everyone but I don't know how to emotionally deal with this. I don't want to deal with this. But quitting isn't exactly an option in my opinion. Its uncomfortable. I guess I just forget that is how I felt when I started therapy and "opened up".

Thanks everyone for your support - really does mean a lot to me.

[EJ711]

Hi Canders,

I really benefitted a lot from group therapy when I was about your age. I found out I wasn't so different from everyone else, which was tremendously healing for me at the time.

EJ

[Christina86]

HI EJ,

Thats just it. I don't think I'll ever really be a part of the group. I seem really different from all of them (and no, its not all just about my disability either). I do hope its helpful - thanks!

you know, canders... its a good thing to be different. being the "same" as others is no fun. allow yourself to deal with it however you feel is best. it is all natural.

i think you are a great person, and you are like no other person i have met. and i am different to anyone around me, but lately i have only just started appreciating that, because i sit here thinking negativiely about those around me, so isnt a good thing to be different.

be yourself,a nd act as yourself, and the group will accept you. they sound as though they have anyway. you cant ever talk too much, as long as you are opening up and trying to make yourself more comfortable, theres no problem in it.

hope it improves

simon

[Christina86]

Thank you dear ((((((((((Simon))))))))) for your wonderfully insightful words. Sometimes I just need to hear something that I know is the truth - just need some sort of validation. And you did that. So thanks.

[Christina86]

Updatedness...

I believe I'm going into my 4th group meeting in about 10 hours.

I've already said too much, and the last meeting I wasn't acting the way I should have been. So I feel the need to be truthful today. That in itself really scares me. But I shouldn't have hidden in my "shell" - I laughed off something I shouldn't have that would have helped me. I swear I wanted to kick myself after for being such an idiot. But I let it go temporarily to speak about it today.

Hopefully all will go well. All I know is that I rescheduled a dentist appointment that would have been today (since it is 12:05 am currently) so that I could attend this group and not miss a meeting. My mental health seems more important than my teeth - since I already know the outcome of the dentist appointment.

If it seems really important I'll update y'all after I get back from the meeting. Otherwise I won't. I should really learn to not speak (err, type) so much.

[Christina86]

OOooh update.

Still in group.

Second to last meeting in 10 hours. Need to sleep soon before I go.

It's hard hard hard work to go and try to work on oneself with other people. Or maybe I'm just not a group person. Not sure.

Either way, this meeting will either be the best or worst experience because of my really recent bad mood-swings. Will be interesting.

I loved it when I took a psychology corse called Personal Psychology. Because it was a college course we didn't go into specific details about ourselves to the whole class. We were asked to keep a journal and taught how to do such things as brainstorming, problem solving skills andhow to locate services in the community. We had homework where we had to use a personal experience as practice in learning what we were taught in the class. But talking about that homework and what we learned about ourselves was on a volluneer basis. One of our homework assignments was to bring something in the to the next class that would explain and or show the class who we are. I asked my boss, therapist, a co worker and a friend to write down three sentences of who they think I am and then I put those three sentences by each person into a poem and then concluded with who I thought I was first answering what others see in me and then answering what I saw in myself. Getting up in front of the class for this assignment was manditory. It was a really cool class.

[Christina86]

final update for anyone who still is paying attention.

last session was today.

i've learned so much and been challenged in so many ways, to the point where i may go to the next group formed which starts in january.

could be interesting.

Glad things worked out for you. I was wondering how it was going on this for you.

Hang in there

[Perna]

Glad your group was helpful for you. It takes time to learn to "jump in." I was in a group nearly 10 years! back in the 1970's and it was about as long getting use to it and using it well as it was getting comfortable with my individual T. I had been in a couple groups before that but they were not very good, the leaders let "attacks" happen, etc.