[SoupDragon]

l came here to post this and then saw a similar thread. Didn't want to highjack it, hence this one.

So have been seeing T for 4 years. Hard to believe it has been that long and we have never talked about the "big" stuff.

l saw Nymphomaniac at the weekend. An interesting film, but content aside, the film made me realise how much l do trust and respect my T.

This led to me raising this film in session and starting to talk about elements of it which did cause some embarrassment. And now after believing there are some things l could never tell T, l am thinking that although unlikely, may be it is possible,

But at the moment I am feeling rather horrible and yuky about talking about sex at all with T. l wonder whether there is a boundary to content with T. l sensed him not wanting detail, but don't know if he was protecting him or me. Do T's also need to get their heads around talking sex with their clients?

[Canyon]

Originally Posted by SoupDragon

Do T's also need to get their heads around talking sex with their clients?

Hmm, I think it depends on the Ts personality and how long they have been in practice. I think after they have been in practice for a while, they have heard just about everything.

I had one T that was really free and open about how she felt that sex was such an integral part of the adult human experience. She also let it slip one time that it was something that she enjoyed immensely. That helped me to talk to her about basically anything. My current T is a totally different story. He seems to be a bit more uptight about it (which has made it impossible to talk to him about it).

[RTerroni]

If you want to talk to your Therapist about sex than you should be able to.

Soup, I think sometimes they do need some time to get their head around it. I think I surprised my T the first time I mentioned something sexual and he seemed a bit anxious and just a bit flustered. We talked about it and he admitted he is basically pretty shy in general and was just caught by surprise. He has since become more more comfortable with the topic with me. Good for you for being brave enough to bring it up.

[Leah123]

I recently read a study here about how even in couples marriage counseling, female therapists are often unlikely to raise sexual compatibility or difficulty issues, which is clearly doing those clients a disservice in my opinion. Certainly, that's not true of all therapists, or all female therapists, but it goes to show that what one poster's therapist accurately called an integral part of being human, isn't as integral as it should be in therapy in a lot of cases.

As someone dealing with issues of sexual abuse, I do find it very complex to discuss sexuality in some cases with my therapist, some potential landmines around the issue, however, I do find it important to bring my experience of sexuality into therapy, and it usually goes just fine, fortunately, with this experienced therapist I'm seeing now.

My t is completely comfortable talking about sex.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by Starry_Night

My t is completely comfortable talking about sex.

I think that all Therapists should be comfortable talking about it, I already told my Therapist that I am not real intimate.

[JaneC]

I will need to talk about a few topics of a sexual nature at some stage with my T which is scary for me, but I will get there.

A few weeks back I made reference to something of a sexual nature and my T appeared to blush and seem uncomfortable. The next week I had to ask him about this as it worried me that I would not be able to talk to him about what I needed for fear of his discomfort, and therefore my own discomfort. He was great and talked about how hard it can be as a male psychologist working with women, but for him it would not be difficult to discuss whatever I needed. I felt somewhat reassured. As for detail...... ugh I'll face that when we get there!

[SoupDragon]

l tend to forget the gender thing when I am with T, maybe talking about sex is something we both need time to get used to.