Mr Analyst is encouraging me to free associate. Just say what comes to mind he says, talk about the first thing that arises he says...WHAT. What if I say I want to kill your wife? says I, well I think there is a big difference between saying it and doing it he says.

He says its interesting to look at the bits you find difficult to say, he says it is interesting to ask ourselves what is it for me to say what comes to mind TO him. He says when we don't censor we tap into other knowledge.

I can't wrap my head around it...to not censor myself? Sometimes I look at his couch and imagine all sorts of sordid filth....So I would just say that? WHAT!?

You know what is worse, I reckon one day I will try it. He's done it loads when he had analysis, I have a lot of respect for that.

Anyone tried it?

[A Red Panda]

Nope, but my T is starting to learn how to work with that.

Yes, to some extent anyway. My T encourages free association, he is all about the not censoring myself, and he leaves a lot of silence to allow things to bubble up. It is hard, but I have never regretted the sessions where I have managed to decouple my inner censor and just talk.

For me, the key is not thinking about doing it. When I think "I have to associate, I have to associate" it becomes a pressure to perform - I have to stop thinking about T's possible reactions to what I am saying, and that's only possible sometimes.

It's not the pure psychoanalytic form of free analysis, though, because T does comment and ask questions, and ask me to elaborate on points I make, and sometimes he directs the conversation based on something I have said, when there is a topic that needs exploring further.

[nottrustin]

I don't think I could do it...

Originally Posted by StarShank

I can't wrap my head around it...to not censor myself? ...
Anyone tried it?

Hi, yes, that's the whole point-to not censor yourself.

It is hard. It helps that my T is very active, asking lots of questions, making interpretations, and summarizing things for me.

But each time i pause for a minute, he asks-what are you thinking? or What's going through your mind? I just told him that he is very intense.

Analyzing unfiltered thoughts allows you to find out who you really are. It also brings the unconscious conscious.

You'll get used to it; just keep trying.

[stopdog]

I don't censor myself when I talk to my dog. I just patter on at him. So I suppose if I wanted to free associate, I would talk like I do to the dog.

[Lauliza]

I didn't think many ts did this anymore. Do you find it helpful?

[sweepy62]

My t asks when I'm in silence what is going through my mind, it pisses me off.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Originally Posted by skies

Hi, yes, that's the whole point-to not censor yourself.

It is hard. It helps that my T is very active, asking lots of questions, making interpretations, and summarizing things for me.

But each time i pause for a minute, he asks-what are you thinking? or What's going through your mind? I just told him that he is very intense.

Analyzing unfiltered thoughts allows you to find out who you really are. It also brings the unconscious conscious.

You'll get used to it; just keep trying.

Classic free association involves a T who is not active, though. Not censoring oneself is part of most therapy, I would think, but free association in its pure form means no input from T - it's your associations, not T's, that are looked at. But I have no experience of this completely free association, just a kind of middle way where T does comment on what I say, from time to time. (I would hate it if he did not allow me to be quiet for a few minutes without asking about my thoughts, I have to say.)

[HazelGirl]

My T has me do that, but she is very interactive. She will ask questions and direct the conversation with those questions. My role is to answer with what comes to mind without censoring it or trying to make it sound "better" than it really is.

Originally Posted by Mastodon

Classic free association involves a T who is not active, though. Not censoring oneself is part of most therapy, I would think, but free association in its pure form means no input from T - it's your associations, not T's, that are looked at.

Yes, the more active therapist part is the main difference between classic psychoanalysis and psychoanalytic psychotherapy. But it's still a form of free association. The key is to say it as soon as it comes to mind rather than deciding whether or not you want to say it (which happens in a split second). That's the hard part.

Originally Posted by skies

The key is to say it as soon as it comes to mind rather than deciding whether or not you want to say it (which happens in a split second). That's the hard part.

Yep, that's definitely the hard part.

sometimes i free associate, but then T just seems keen to move onto her preferred question and i feel rejected and that my topic was wrong.

Originally Posted by Mastodon

Yep, that's definitely the hard part.

Tell me about it.

I like it though, because it's like making little discoveries throughout the session. It's kind of like 'reverse CBT'...

Originally Posted by skies

The key is to say it as soon as it comes to mind rather than deciding whether or not you want to say it (which happens in a split second). That's the hard part.

Yes I can see how that would be hard! I think the shame worries me, I could say all manner of awful things....I'm scared he might hate me or find me disgusting.

Skies, can you say how it is like reverse CBT? I find that very interesting!

Illegal Toilet, now this also scared me too. Sometimes Mr Analyst says "I think what you said was important" and that makes me feel good.

Skies, can you say how it is like reverse CBT?

I don't really know. I think i was free associating when i said that because it just popped up in my mind.

I guess-

With CBT, you try to redirect your emotions to think what you don't believe.

With PAT, you try not to think to know what you believe.

Or something like that!

[ECHOES]

Sometimes it is hard to say what comes to mind when it comes to mind.
It is fascinating to see what comes up. Sometimes it is just fun to 'blurt it out', as we might consider it outside of therapy. I once told my therapist that I was attracted to her breasts. I think my eyes opened wide after I said that. I knew it but I was so surprised that I could say it out loud.

It doesn't have to be disjointed, like word-association, although it could be. And there is no right or wrong way to free associate. When you learn to allow all thoughts into therapy, and in meditation, you can learn to allow them most any time, and they can be windows that let you see and learn more about you. Sometimes they can be funny! When you have a thought and know the meaning behind it, it can make you smile - an "inside" joke with yourself.

Thank-You! Your post really illuminated it for me. I am going to try just a little bit.