[rainbow8]

Does anyone know if there is a rule or state law forbidding Ts to have contact with clients after termination, or do Ts make up their own rules about this? Why would a T say it's all right to write or email, but say they are not "allowed" to respond?

None of my former Ts forbade me to contact them, though my first one told me she wouldn't reply, and she never did. The others either answered my letter (this was before email), or emailed me back. They accepted phone calls from me, also. It was only occasional contact in each case.

I also wonder about the rule that a T is only "allowed" to greet a client if the client speaks first. One of my former Ts told me about that, but she said "hi" to me in the grocery store once, before I did, because I didn't see her!

[HazelGirl]

There are guidelines that are in place in the psychology community that say to wait for two years. I get the impression there are a ton of those "unspoken" rules that almost all T's follow.

But other than having a sexual relationship with clients, there are no state laws that I am aware of.

I also know that my T has said I will be able to contact her after my therapy is done if I need her for something, but I get the impression it will never be a mutual relationship.

[Cherubbs]

I must admit I was a bit shocked when I read some of the boundary rules here, I guess it varies from place to place but some of them do seem shocking to be honest. Why on earth can't a therapist choose to stay in touch with ex clients it's quite strange..

[rainbow8]

Thank you, HazelGirl. I'm not talking about rules for a social relationship, but therapeutic contact, to say how you're doing, and for a T to email back. Not a mutual relationship.

[AmysJourney]

This is a complicated issue! Yes, there are rules about contact after termination. It may vary from state to state and from country to country.
For example, there are quite strict rules in the state where I live how many years need to be between termination and relationship especially a romantic relationship.

The problem with contact after termination is that while in therapy there is a helper/helpee dynamic. Usually the therapeutic relationship is very one sided as it focuses on you, the client. So hardly ever a REAL friendship emerges that can be taken outside the therapy room. Even though the relationship is real and both parts have real feelings towards each other, it still is predominantly one sided and the goal is to equip us with tools and confidence to live a good life after therapy ends. Many people who want contact after termination want it because of the one-sidedness (sorry, bad word) because they still want the support, the empathy, the love and the good feelings they had in therapy. Which is why many therapists "accept" some form of contact because they want to "help" the client and because of course they care.
But many ex-clients have taken that contact too far and still do. And therapists have to weigh the individual pros and cons of this contact. Mostly it is for the client's benefit!
There are a lot of ethical questions around this and for many it's not as easy as reading a paragraph in a law book.

As to the rule to greet a client only if the client speaks first.. In my therapists disclosure form it says: "If I meet you in a public setting, like a supermarket or on the street, I will not acknowledge you or speak to you."

This is actually very important because it has solely to do with the confidentiality the therapist is obliged to uphold. Like for example a client is at the supermarket with a friend and the therapist comes up and asks how the client is, or even just says hi, it may compromise the confidentiality because the friend might ask who that person was and it could put the client into an awkward situation. It's not rejection or not care, it's simply because of confidentiality and I actually appreciate that a lot.

I hope this helps.

[feralkittymom]

In the US it's not generally about laws unless there has been actionable contact resulting in harm--in practice this is usually about either sexual involvements or financial involvements pre or post termination, with occasional time limits applied.

Short of laws there are state and organizational ethical codes of conduct, some of which are enforced by state boards of practice which can issue sanctions including mandatory surrender of license to practice.

Below these are "recommendations" by professional organizations and state boards: actions that are discouraged, but not generally actionable without proof of harm.

What constitutes "providing therapy services" varies, but many Ts who permit contact that doesn't violate any of the above, put limits on the level and character of their involvement in such contact. So some may refuse to reply, some will reply but not offer advice or comment in a therapeutic way, etc. It really is up to the T to interpret the guidelines.

The greeting issue is usually to protect confidentiality.

[stopdog]

In my jurisdiction I do not know of a law that forbids it, and I have seen two therapists who actively kept in touch with former clients. I became friends with one former therapist right after stopping therapy. The two I see now, I don't really have any reason to want to stay in contact with after therapy.

If you have terminated therapy, further therapeutic contact may be something a therapist would not advise, or if they did allow it, it would probably be on a very limited and very infrequent basis.

[ScarletPimpernel]

In CA, in January 2014, the law states:

§4992.3. UNPROFESSIONAL CONDUCT; EFFECT ON LICENSEE OR REGISTRANT

(l) Engaging in sexual relations with a client or with a former client within two years from the termination date of therapy with the client, soliciting sexual relations with a client, or committing an act of sexual abuse, or sexual misconduct with a client, or committing an act punishable as a sexually related crime, if that act or solicitation is substantially related to the qualifications, functions, or duties of a clinical social worker.

I thought I read somewhere that social relationship was 2 years and sexual was 7...not sure where I read that though

But just written communication...I think that's up to the T. I know I was allowed to stay in contact with my last T (though I didn't want to), the T before her (which I still write to), and my counselor from the board and care I stayed at (I am friends with her on Facebook and have her personal email).

I talked to my current T about contact after termination, and she said I can always stay in contact with her. And that if she's still practicing and in the area, I can go back and see her on an "as needed basis" for therapy.

[RTerroni]

It has been over a year since I ended with my 4 year Therapist and I have yet to try to get back in touch with her, if I do decide to it will likely not be until after the 2 year mark.

I know here it's two years before a therapist can contact you after terminating. Although, in saying that I emailed my t1 a few months ago and she emailed back and it was only a year later. To be honest I think they make up their own rules as they go along

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Bentay]

I wish I could stay in touch with my T but I know that's not possible. Perhaps this no contact rule is for the therapist benefit as they may not want to be in touch with some clients & this is just an easy get out clause.

Hi Rainbow, several months past I contacted personnel at the APA for another matter, and I put this question to them, because it so often comes up on this particular forum. There use to be a two year wait for Friendships. "At present we are not aware of any state in the USA that still has a two year wait in their behavioral ethics codes for platonic friendships." This goes for all professionals licensed in mental health. The states get their ethics codes from the the professional associations, and so do many other countries. In fact, many therapist think this two year wait still exist in their state. I would like to see people look it up and hopefully post what they learn to your thread. Both my individual and group Therapist said this two years and five months ago, respectively. Many therapist are just not aware that the code has changed.

It is an individual therapist's choice regarding platonic friendship/contact with former clients. Many that work for agencies, public or private practice groups, set additional rules of conduct. That maybe what some clients are running up against.

The no sex contact is a two years ban from the termination of therapy, and a licensing issue if it is violated, UNLESS a particular state has strengthened their law regarding this matter. Less than a handful of state ( < 2 ? ) make sex a criminal issue. I don't know how the two year rule applies regarding sex. My vote is a lifetime ban on sex with clients, IMO.

As for the meet and greet, that is taught in schools, training, etc. Unfortunately, I think it just helps continue the shame of getting help when we need it, IMO only. This was a thread on the boards early on in my therapy, and I told my therapist that I would be highly offended if she saw me and ignored me. She said she would never do that. I saw her quite a few times in public and she came over to me and visa versa. I even introduced her to my friends. She has a good memory as to what client wants what. Could she make a mistake if she has to remember what client wants what. Of course! Real life is what she teaches her clients to deal with.

Take care Rainbow 8,

GTGT

[Brightheart]

I email mine twice a year and let him know how I'm doing. He always responds briefly and supportively and he seems to appreciate hearing from me.

I've been out of therapy since December 2008 and I'm grateful we can remain in contact this way.

[ThisWayOut]

I had updated one of my earlier t's for a few years after termination (saw her through school and was unable to keep seeing her after graduation). I don't think she ever responded with more than thanking me for the update and she was glad I was doing well (only ever updated her on the good stuff). She was also the only student t that remained at the organization after her internship. One t terminated me because I was too much, so I never kept in touch nor did I have any desire to keep in touch. It was only later that I realized how much her strong views on how I should receive treatment actually negatively impacted all of it. The t i left because of a cross-country move I keep in touch with still and may be going back to see her later this year as we are moving back to the area... I think it all depends on the situation and the nature of the relationship after termination. You had said you were thinking along the therapeutic lines. From a business standpoint, I could see how sporadic contact for help may necessitate getting paid at some point... that part is left to the therapist and/or clinic from which they practice. The t I see now I doubt I'd keep in contact with except maybe to update on how the move went and such, but we have not talked about that. I'd love to keep in contact with our couples therapist add friends, but I doubt she wants that...

[rainbow8]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

I know here it's two years before a therapist can contact you after terminating. Although, in saying that I emailed my t1 a few months ago and she emailed back and it was only a year later. To be honest I think they make up their own rules as they go along

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Maybe emailing back is in a different category from "being friends" with? I do think they decide for themselves how to interpret the rules!

Originally Posted by Bentay

I wish I could stay in touch with my T but I know that's not possible. Perhaps this no contact rule is for the therapist benefit as they may not want to be in touch with some clients & this is just an easy get out clause.

I'm sorry, Bentay. It's really hard when therapy ends, I know.

Originally Posted by Goingtogetthere

Hi Rainbow, several months past I contacted personnel at the APA for another matter, and I put this question to them, because it so often comes up on this particular forum. There use to be a two year wait for Friendships. "At present we are not aware of any state in the USA that still has a two year wait in their behavioral ethics codes for platonic friendships." This goes for all professionals licensed in mental health. The states get their ethics codes from the the professional associations, and so do many other countries. In fact, many therapist think this two year wait still exist in their state. I would like to see people look it up and hopefully post what they learn to your thread. Both my individual and group Therapist said this two years and five months ago, respectively. Many therapist are just not aware that the code has changed.

It is an individual therapist's choice regarding platonic friendship/contact with former clients. Many that work for agencies, public or private practice groups, set additional rules of conduct. That maybe what some clients are running up against.

The no sex contact is a two years ban from the termination of therapy, and a licensing issue if it is violated, UNLESS a particular state has strengthened their law regarding this matter. Less than a handful of state ( < 2 ? ) make sex a criminal issue. I don't know how the two year rule applies regarding sex. My vote is a lifetime ban on sex with clients, IMO.

As for the meet and greet, that is taught in schools, training, etc. Unfortunately, I think it just helps continue the shame of getting help when we need it, IMO only. This was a thread on the boards early on in my therapy, and I told my therapist that I would be highly offended if she saw me and ignored me. She said she would never do that. I saw her quite a few times in public and she came over to me and visa versa. I even introduced her to my friends. She has a good memory as to what client wants what. Could she make a mistake if she has to remember what client wants what. Of course! Real life is what she teaches her clients to deal with.

Take care Rainbow 8,

GTGT

Thank you, GTGT. That sure is interesting that the 2 year wait is not true anymore, except for sexual relationships. I agree that Ts should almost never have sex with former clients; it's too confusing. I know that my Ts all said that we couldn't be friends, because "what if I wanted to come back to see them" in the future. They left that door open to me. My current T will probably say the same thing, but I know she will let me stay in contact with her via email, and she'd even respond to me then, she told me. I'm not sure I ever want to stop seeing her, though. Not to be morbid, but I'll probably die first. I want her to be my T as I age, at least on an "as needed" basis.

My Ts also told me that they wouldn't respond in public unless I did it first, but my former T who did speak to me first, was a member of my community so it wouldn't have seemed weird for her to talk to me anyway.

Originally Posted by Brightheart

I email mine twice a year and let him know how I'm doing. He always responds briefly and supportively and he seems to appreciate hearing from me.

I've been out of therapy since December 2008 and I'm grateful we can remain in contact this way.

I know how much it means to you that you can remain in touch with your T. I'm glad you have that agreement with him.

Originally Posted by MdngtRain

I had updated one of my earlier t's for a few years after termination (saw her through school and was unable to keep seeing her after graduation). I don't think she ever responded with more than thanking me for the update and she was glad I was doing well (only ever updated her on the good stuff). She was also the only student t that remained at the organization after her internship. One t terminated me because I was too much, so I never kept in touch nor did I have any desire to keep in touch. It was only later that I realized how much her strong views on how I should receive treatment actually negatively impacted all of it. The t i left because of a cross-country move I keep in touch with still and may be going back to see her later this year as we are moving back to the area... I think it all depends on the situation and the nature of the relationship after termination. You had said you were thinking along the therapeutic lines. From a business standpoint, I could see how sporadic contact for help may necessitate getting paid at some point... that part is left to the therapist and/or clinic from which they practice. The t I see now I doubt I'd keep in contact with except maybe to update on how the move went and such, but we have not talked about that. I'd love to keep in contact with our couples therapist add friends, but I doubt she wants that...

Thank you. I meant that I wasn't talking about pursuing a friendship, but just emailing back and forth occasionally. I think most Ts allow it to some extent, and was wondering why a T would specifically NOT allow it at all. I'm not really sure why my first T told me she would never write me back; I'd still like to contact her after all of these years, at her office address, just to tell her how I've been.