[slbest]

I stopped seeing my therapist I would say about six months ago. Yesterday she posted a picture on Facebook of her office and said that she will be closing her private practice in three months. I haven't had contact with her at all but that you gave me and made me think that maybe I should have some closure with her before she closes her practice. We didn't originally have any kind of closure session because I just cut it off at a random point through email saying I needed more continuity. I'm looking for advice about this you think it would be a bad thing to rehash? I had been with her for six years and my needs were changing which is why I decided to not see her anymore but I still miss her a lot!!

All thoughts and advice so welcome I really need help with this!!!

[ThisWayOut]

I generally think closure is a good thing. Maybe you can call her and see if she would be open to it? It all depends however, on how things were left. If it was a bad fit, then a final session may not necessarily do much for you. If you really do miss her and think that saying goodbye would be beneficial, I would go for it.

[slbest]

Hmmm. Good point. See the thing is things are not left on a bad note I just didn't feel like it was a good fit but I mean I had seen her for six years so I just feel like I have a lot of unfinished business and feelings with her.

[slbest]

Keep your thoughts coming!

[HazelGirl]

I say it probably couldn't hurt to ask at this point. I don't think it will be a bad thing for you, and it's almost always a good idea to have a proper closure to a relationship, especially one that lasted 6 years.

[ThisWayOut]

what are you looking to get out of a closure session? (keeping in mind I am thinking of a single session, not going back for a few sessions to wrap up what was left unfinished). One session will generally only be enough to review what progress you had made, and/or what went off track. If it wasn't really a good fit and you left because therapy wasn't helping you, then I don't see much point in going for a "goodbye" session (You could get that done via a phone call or email). It is a bit daunting that she will be closing her provate practice and you will never get a chance to go back and work on stuff left unfinished with her. Keep in mind though, that you can find another therapist who may provide a better working relationship, and you could address the stuff that you still need to work on...
Like I said, I'm a big fan of closure and "goodbye's" but I guess you have to look at what you are trying to accomplish with it. If it's for your piece of mind, give it a shot. If it's just to tell her all the stuff that went wrong, then maybe not so pressing to do? Had you had any plans to go back to therapy with her at a later time after your abrupt ending?

[slbest]

Good point- this way out- no I had no plans to go back with her at a later time after the abrupt ending but I think about her almost every day. I liked her as a person but we didn't really get much accomplished in therapy which is also another reason why I decided to stop seeing her. Do you think I should talk about this with my current therapist?

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by slbest

Good point- this way out- no I had no plans to go back with her at a later time after the abrupt ending but I think about her almost every day. I liked her as a person but we didn't really get much accomplished in therapy which is also another reason why I decided to stop seeing her. Do you think I should talk about this with my current therapist?

Yes, definitely talk about it with your current T. They know you better than any of us, and can probably give you a better opinion.

[slbest]

Yes I'll talk to her but I like hearing your thoughts here too!

[RTerroni]

I will be having a closure session with my current Therapist 2 weeks from today (since she is leaving the practice that I am currently at) I plan on giving her a goodbye card (which she already told me that she will accept), and she told me that she will give me a hug at the final session as well (which is the one thing that I definitely want at the final session).

[Wren_]

if you are feeling that a closure session would be helpful, and that it could be healing in some way for you then it would be great to both talk to your current T about this and depending on what comes up there, contacting your old T to see if they are open to such a session

did your old T reply at all to the email you sent terminating after six years? and was it something you'd talked about at all before you ended it

[slbest]

Basically at one point we had a session set up and then I emailed and said I'm going to have to cancel and that I would let her know when I would like to reschedule and she responded back and said "what's going on". I then responded and said I need more continuity. She then emailed back and said okay good luck with everything and that was it. And no we hadn't ever talked about terminating at all before ended it. I had known for a while that I wanted to ended but just couldn't so when I finally decided to I just did it without any lead up.