[MusicLover79]

Today I had an intense session with my t and he made me angry and we were yelling back and forth at him and I told him that he was stupid. Then I said he was frustrated with me and he denied it. I ended up yelling at him about him keep looking at the clock Which he denied. Has anyone ever called their therapist out on something?

[Wysteria]

Originally Posted by MusicLover79

Today I had an intense session with my t and he made me angry and we were yelling back and forth at him and I told him that he was stupid. Then I said he was frustrated with me and he denied it. I ended up yelling at him about him keep looking at the clock Which he denied. Has anyone ever called their therapist out on something?

Yes, I have.
I have sent emails with concerns or saying that I'm upset...I have confronted in person, but I don't really remember yelling or having one yell at me...

I told one T that she was lying...she denied it. Finally later admitted to it and I left her as a client...

Another T, I basically said that she had broken my confidentiality, she at first seemed to deny, but then backtracked and said that yes, she could see how what she had done had indeed been innapropriate...she apologized and promised not to do it again. I was not angry, but seemed to really appreciate that I called her on it. I have apologized for lying to her when something was too intense or when it would hurt another group member, but later always email about the lie, why I lied and that I'm sorry. If I demand honesty, I must give it as well....

My main T, I have talked to about things that he said that really hurt my feelings or if what he said felt innapropriate...we have always worked it out. I trust him implicitly because we are honest with one another. I don't see how it could be done otherwise with me at least. He teaches me to communicate better, so it is important to me.

Don't know if that helps or not...hope you can work it out with your T.

WB

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by MusicLover79

Has anyone ever called their therapist out on something?

Oh yes! Sometimes it seemed like I did nothing else.

[stopdog]

Yes, of course. I don't know why a client would not when the the therapist is off base or going in the wrong direction or what ever.

[AmazingGrace7]

Originally Posted by MusicLover79

Today I had an intense session with my t and he made me angry and we were yelling back and forth at him and I told him that he was stupid. Then I said he was frustrated with me and he denied it. I ended up yelling at him about him keep looking at the clock Which he denied. Has anyone ever called their therapist out on something?

Yes, but never in this manner. I have had intense sessions with T's. I can't imagine how calling my T "stupid" and yelling back and forth would be helpful or productive for my therapy unless you had the opportunity to talk about how it affected you.

Sure, I've called him out, but not in this manner. We simply had a conversation where we both voiced our views and opinions about the matter. I don't yell or name-call at people. Just isn't generally necessary and actually weakens the chance the person on the other end will really hear you.

[MusicLover79]

I only called him out on being frustrated which resulted in him looking at the clock a lot during the session which doesn't usually happen. I talked about how it was a waste of a session and he said it wasn't because I was projecting hour I was feeling about myself on him which was probably true but I didn't want to agree. It was a frustrating session fit me though

[Freewilled]

I've never really yelled at him, I don't think, but I've been insistent in my tone and kind of overall snotty. I told him I thought he was being arrogant once or something to that effect....then I took it back (I've also called him out plenty regarding being frustrated at me but it's a long story - I think it may have been part of our bigger rupture......)

I'm wondering if it might help to try and explore where the anger is coming from, in my case anyway. I just realized it might help me to say something like I know I've expressed anger toward you and I know it can't all be about you per se....because I do like you and feel like you're a competent T. Can you help me figure it out? (Before I royally piss you off and have to add you to my long list of losses lol)

Do you think there is any transference involved for you, musicLover?

[MusicLover79]

I don't think there's transference. I think I was just angry. One certain thing he said to me in the session really made me mad. I like my therapist though and I know well move past this. We did talk about that I was masking the problem and that we should talk about what was really making me mad.

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by MusicLover79

Has anyone ever called their therapist out on something?

Yes, but I don't think of it that way. I just make an observation about him and see what he says. Has just happened a few times. For example, at one session, I told T something and he seemed appalled by it. I was not sure why and thought about this quite a bit between sessions. At the next appointment, I said, "last time when I told you X, you seemed appalled." He thought about it a few moments, then said yes, he had been appalled and explained why. I think it is good to check with T when I don't understand his reaction or something he says.

[ScarletPimpernel]

Both my T and I call each other out. We're both perfectionists and we will both be picky about word choice. But we've been trying harder to be extremely clear. Plus, now she tells me that I remember her words too well, so she has to be careful about the words she uses.

One time though, my T said something that upset me. She brought up something that I never knew about. She told me that she mentioned it on our first session and I was just now manipulating her. So, I made copies of my journal and copies of emails to prove to her I didn't know. She didn't apologize or admit to her error, but we did work it out.

[tinyrabbit]

I do this all the time. All. The. Time.

I have no idea why. My T seems to get it but I don't.