So T is short and fairly big. Not obese. I'm felt big too.
The last few sessions I noticed T looked as if she's lost weight.

Today I asked her if she has? She said yes. I asked her was it an intentional thing? She said, well, I'm getting older (she was 60 recently) and I'm not very fit and do not want to end up in a wheelchair or one of those scooter things.

This is silly, but I felt with her being content with her previous body shape, that I could be too. Now I feel I've got to lose weight.

Crazy, I know.

[Perna]

Oh. My T was short and very small, Asian. I felt like a bull in a china shop sometimes. We talked once or twice about my perceptions of how her/my size would change depending on how I felt. Tell her if she's going to lose weight you all have to meet in a smaller room so it isn't as obvious :-)

[precaryous]

Are you over weight?

Yes I am. I take remeron and am considering quitting as it's well known for its side effects. Namely, weight gain.

I gained 40 pounds in two months on remeron. And I felt like a zombie all the time. I feel for you!

[Wysteria]

I don't think it's crazy at all...
For one thing, you want to relate to your T and it seems that if she was content with her size than you could be too. But if she is not, than you "should" not... It may also be that she triggered something in you to look harder at whether or not the downsides to being overweight changed how you view your own health, and that may or may not be a good thing. Perhaps from a purely for your own good health standpoint, you might decide to take a few off. It also may have caused some anxiety for you that T is getting older or has fears and may have triggered your own about aging.
In the end, just be happy with your own body and realize that IF you want to change it a bit you can in healthy ways and will when you are ready.
If you are anxious about T, you might bring it up and just discuss it. Fear of aging or health deficits are always scary and natural and a good thing to discuss.
No, not crazy at all....talk it over with your T...your anxiety is real and worthy of a good discussion imo...

Gentle hugs,
Wysteria Blue

[precaryous]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

Yes I am. I take remeron and am considering quitting as it's well known for its side effects. Namely, weight gain.

I'm overweight, too. I just had lapband weight loss surgery a few months ago to help me with it.

I'm sorry remeron is causing such a weight gain. I would want to switch, too.

[anilam]

That's a tough one- im not overweight but am weight sensitive (used to be MA) and my T loosing weight would be a huge trigger for me. Sucks the med thing, I gained nearly 20 pounds while on meds.
Please, do not stop taking meds that are helping you- I know, easier said than done. God knows I surely would stop ASAP but that's me and my distorted body/self image:/

One thing though, I've been severely under weight, overweight, normal weight... Whatever the number and I still hate my body. Loosing weight won't help you to love/accept yourself

[unaluna]

I would say its definitely an age thing, not so much a size thing. After 60 You slow down and cant bend, and weight seems like something you can change to speed and flex you back up. I remember after 40, i couldnt stay up all night working and then work the whole next day, like i used to in my 20's. Geez no wonder i sleep 18 hrs a day now! Darn computers.

[Perna]

Mouse, have you gained weight in therapy (not just from the remeron)? I did and figured out I was getting better but my body was adding on the pounds and "defending" me with its size as I got psychologically freer. It was like instead of having to stay in my room/isolated I was taking myself on the road but had to have a larger vessel, a tank instead of a BB gun LOL.

Yes I've gained weight in therapy. But I was newly sober then and begun eating. Plus I went on remeron at the same time.