[AllyIsHopeful]

So the theory about my therapist sending in a clone or twin has got to be true. (I realize it is not, but it is how things are)

I was running late for my last appointment but didn't text or call her because I was driving in traffic. For the past few months, when this has happened, she texts me with directions on what to do once I got there so we could get started right away. Or she'd send a text asking "Are you coming to session?" or "Will you be here soon?"

I've been having timing issues lately. So the most recent session, I had already arrived at the building and she sent a text asking "Are you ok?" It has been forever since she's asked that and it feels like everything has hope of going back to the way things used to be. I don't have any desire for between session contact anymore, though, unless something really terrible happens. She allows it all still but those strong urges to just text her everyday, or call her have all gone away. I guess her concern is that I live closer to the office we were meeting in for that session (we rarely meet there).

I missed our relationship. It felt unique, genuine, and human. I really hope it starts developing into a new and better version of our old one, so I can continue growing and I could actually trust her again and feel the safe attachment.

[glok]

Hello, AllyIsHopeful. My suggestion is for you to print a copy of your post for your therapist. Maybe, you need to amend the treatment plan?

I wish you well.

[CantExplain]

I never did work out if it was me or T who had changed when things went bad.

[IndestructibleGirl]

I hope it develops into a new better version for you too, Ally. It does look promising, since it sounds like you felt optimistic when she texted you in the old familiar way - it sounds like you felt a flicker of trust start to come back? Did you?

I hope things get back to normal for you too Ally, and I'm sure they will. Sounds like you have/had a great relationship with your therapist. It's nice to know they won't reject us for the most part.

[AllyIsHopeful]

Originally Posted by glok

Hello, AllyIsHopeful. My suggestion is for you to print a copy of your post for your therapist. Maybe, you need to amend the treatment plan?

I wish you well.

I don't know about bringing any sort of writing or text into session with me. It makes me uncomfortable because she will have me read it. I'd rather just continue our course of work because it seems to be continuously getting better in different ways. Thank you for the well wishes. I've been needing those lately.

Originally Posted by CantExplain

I never did work out if it was me or T who had changed when things went bad.

Sometimes it's both...It is possible for one person to outgrow another; But it is also a possibility that you both outgrew each other. Maybe? Could also not be the best match since there was a lot of struggle with power and transference, if I'm remembering correctly? I hope she gets a hold of you as she said she would. If you feel you want to make amends, I would suggest reminding her about the appointment you requested.

[AllyIsHopeful]

Originally Posted by IndestructibleGirl

I hope it develops into a new better version for you too, Ally. It does look promising, since it sounds like you felt optimistic when she texted you in the old familiar way - it sounds like you felt a flicker of trust start to come back? Did you?

I definitely felt a flicker of trust come back. I have been feeling little things here and there and those have been giving me lots of hope. I just want things to work with her because of our history and I'm annoyed at the thought of starting all over with someone who knows nothing about anything.

By the way...Missed you. Where have you been? I'm one to talk... lol

Originally Posted by 8888an8888

I hope things get back to normal for you too Ally, and I'm sure they will. Sounds like you have/had a great relationship with your therapist. It's nice to know they won't reject us for the most part.

Thank you so much. I have a great relationship with her but we *had* a better one. I don't want to go back to that, though. I want to move forward and hope it grows into what I need it to be for the time being.
Yes, there are great Therapists out there it's just difficult searching for them. I'm not sure rejection, reasonably, is supposed to be in the job description for a Therapist. I hope there aren't too many rejecting T's.....